Floxed

Yes I definitely want to leave. Two main symptoms are extreme tendon damage and extreme fatigue. Basically I have been in bed for two years and it’s not even a close call regarding leaving.

it’s torture. I am telling you I am very familiar with Sarno absolutely believe his theories if they don’t apply to when you are literally poisoned.

what you are reading only scratches the very surface. my insurance doesn’t cover MRIs unless I have several thousand dollars to put down which I don’t and the type of damage indicative of this is different than normal damage. It is not a tear necessarily. The collagen matrix is damaged, but I don’t need to spend thousands of dollars and have this sent to an expert far away to know what I have.

but this is not the way it’s diagnosed anyway. it is a diagnosis by exclusion. my doctor already admitted what it was, but won’t admit it publicly or in writing. There is actually no disease where multiple tendons are damaged all at once there is no such thing except this. You could see the tearing in the ankle just google Achilles tendinosis or tendinitis and you can see what it looks like.

they are now sending me to a rheumatologist and a neurologist to rule out things but absolutely do not have arthritis. My joints are fine. Everyone this with this has to play this game and it is very difficult for me to get to these doctors. I might need an ambulanc. I went from completely active. I’m talking a middle-aged guy who can do 20 strict pull-ups. My body is now like a 95-year-old and not even a healthy one

it is literally dangerous for me to stay like this because I have no way to take care of myself and right now. I’m just relying on people helping me, but that’s no way to live and this isn’t living whatsoever. I do have pain but not like the first six months which was extreme, but I am literally in bed 24 hours a day and I can only walk about 100 to 150 steps a day, which is basically to the bathroom once in the kitchen ones as if I was 100 years old.

at this moment I hear a mouse, but I can’t even set a mouse trap so I have to wait till tomorrow to ask somebody

I can’t do laundry or fill up a bathtub. Basically I can get to the bathroom and that’s it but even then I only go to defecate but to urinate I use bottles next to me.

 

@Cheffo
I’m sorry for your struggles.
I too was bed bound for about 2 years, unable to walk much for 1.5 of that. It is distressing, depressing and causes anxiety.
I know you say it doesn’t feel like all or even some of this is TMS, yet here you are, on a TMS forum.
I’m impressed that despite the lack of safety you feel within yourself, and the physical vulnerability of having to be cared for by others, your pain level has been reducing, even though things are still incredibly rough.

What can we do to support you through your TMS journey? What do you need?

 

Look, I have severe crohns in my colon but I feel not pain. I have severe pain in my hips and legs when I sit but I have no tissue or structural damage in those areas. This proves one thing to me ie that even with inflammation, damage etc the brain can choose to turn on or off pain signals. You can heal from this. The loving family in this website can and will support you.

 

Perhaps your tendon damage is caused by the med. I wasn't contesting that. I know drug injuries are possible. I also know TMS exploration can't cure cancer or infection or fractures. What it can do is change the way your brain processes that painful experience, so while it can't cure the damage done, it can help you deal with the painful results.