Hi all, I posted here as I was starting the education program earlier in the summer. My journey is I hurt my back in February pulling a boot off my foot. I have dealt with chronic pain and other issues from various sources for about 18 months total at this point. I saw a lot of progress in the early summer, especially after I did a big bike trip in July. I went into the trip scared about my back, as it’d be a week of biking all day, 450+ miles total. I started the trip with pain, but I was listening to Alan Gordon’s book “The Way Out” and really felt good with his methodology. By the end of day 1 of the trip I said “screw it” and decided I wasn’t gonna think about it anymore. The trip went very well and I totally forgot about my back! It’s been about 2 months since and I’ve felt great, occasionally some minor issues but living life normally for the most part. However, a little over a week ago I felt like I completely reverted to where I was.
So, to be fair, I feel like this is classic TMS, but it’s still rough. Long story short, I met a girl! And I quickly started meeting her family. She invited me to her sisters wedding and that entailed spending 5 days with her and her immediate and extended family. My back was hurting leading up to the weekend, as I was stressed out about getting outfits sorted (turns out getting a suit on a days notice is difficult). The day of the wedding though, PHEW!, my back was killing towards the end of the night. I felt so defeated. It hurt bad the next few days too as I spent more time with her family.
I’ve felt pressure from her family about providing. I work a physical job (firefighter/EMT), so obviously the back thing is a concern long term to support a family. I also recently made a big career decision within the department, so that’s been a stressor as well. Basically I’m STRESSED about literally everything right now. Good stress (excited about the new girl) and bad stress (pressures, thinking about career options and or changes), but stress nonetheless. As I’m writing this I do realize it a bit more that this is clearly induced by recent events, but it’s just difficult and I’m worried sick and I’m tired of being in pain again. I haven’t touched any TMS related materials since mid July—I haven’t needed them since my bike trip. Now I feel like I have to go back. I’m also wondering if I should consider therapy.
Symptom-wise I have the same left lower back pain and the frequent feeling that the from my calf down on my left feels weird. Not numbness, or tingling, or even pain… just off, like my socks are too tight and my pant leg grabs my leg hairs more than the other side; hypersensitive. This is a familiar feeling. I don’t have any increase in symptoms when doing activities, bending at the waist, lifting, running, etc., though some mornings I wake up feeling tight in my lower back. Yesterday I did a pretty grueling 2 hour bike ride with no issues. It just doesn’t make sense. Why can’t I shake this? Am I going to struggle with this forever? Is there actually something structurally wrong? I lived just fine for two months, and now I’m just stuck in the vicious worry cycle again that started when I initially began having pain in February. I was worried about my back before, but now that I’m with her I wouldn’t be able to forgive myself if I lose a girl like her because of my stupid back!
So, to be fair, I feel like this is classic TMS, but it’s still rough. Long story short, I met a girl! And I quickly started meeting her family. She invited me to her sisters wedding and that entailed spending 5 days with her and her immediate and extended family. My back was hurting leading up to the weekend, as I was stressed out about getting outfits sorted (turns out getting a suit on a days notice is difficult). The day of the wedding though, PHEW!, my back was killing towards the end of the night. I felt so defeated. It hurt bad the next few days too as I spent more time with her family.
I’ve felt pressure from her family about providing. I work a physical job (firefighter/EMT), so obviously the back thing is a concern long term to support a family. I also recently made a big career decision within the department, so that’s been a stressor as well. Basically I’m STRESSED about literally everything right now. Good stress (excited about the new girl) and bad stress (pressures, thinking about career options and or changes), but stress nonetheless. As I’m writing this I do realize it a bit more that this is clearly induced by recent events, but it’s just difficult and I’m worried sick and I’m tired of being in pain again. I haven’t touched any TMS related materials since mid July—I haven’t needed them since my bike trip. Now I feel like I have to go back. I’m also wondering if I should consider therapy.
Symptom-wise I have the same left lower back pain and the frequent feeling that the from my calf down on my left feels weird. Not numbness, or tingling, or even pain… just off, like my socks are too tight and my pant leg grabs my leg hairs more than the other side; hypersensitive. This is a familiar feeling. I don’t have any increase in symptoms when doing activities, bending at the waist, lifting, running, etc., though some mornings I wake up feeling tight in my lower back. Yesterday I did a pretty grueling 2 hour bike ride with no issues. It just doesn’t make sense. Why can’t I shake this? Am I going to struggle with this forever? Is there actually something structurally wrong? I lived just fine for two months, and now I’m just stuck in the vicious worry cycle again that started when I initially began having pain in February. I was worried about my back before, but now that I’m with her I wouldn’t be able to forgive myself if I lose a girl like her because of my stupid back!
