I am on week 3 or the Structured Educational Program. My story can be found here. My pain is getting worse, and it's gotten to the point where I can't take care of my kids. Cooking dinner feels impossible sometimes...changing diapers and chasing toddlers too. I know I'm supposed to do my normal activities and just "observe" the pain. I am asking myself "what is this pain trying to tell me?" But honestly, the pain is so bad, I can't think about anything else. How do you continue to do your normal activities when the pain is so bad? How do you NOT tense up and "expect" the pain? I try, but the pain still comes. I'm so worried that this program is not going to work for me. Thank you for any insight you can give me.
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Alan has completed the new Pain Recovery Program. To read or share it, use this updated link: https://www.tmswiki.org/forum/painrecovery/
Feeling discouraged...pain is getting worse
- Thread starter ashljunk
- Start date
Rather than trying to analyse the pain or make yourself relax, try bringing your attention back to your breathing. You don't need to make the pain go away or convince yourself that everything is fine. Just pause for a moment and notice your breath — the feeling of the air coming in, and then going out. Let your breathing be as natural as possible.
When you notice yourself tensing in anticipation of the pain, you can gently acknowledge it: “There’s the fear and anticipation again.” Then bring your attention back to your breathing and to what is actually happening in this moment, rather than what you fear might happen with the next movement.
You might even make the goal much smaller. Instead of thinking, “I have to cook dinner while ignoring this pain,” think, “For the next minute, I’m going to breathe and stay present while I do this one thing.” Then another minute.
And importantly, I wouldn't interpret the increase in pain as proof that the programme isn't working. Recovery isn't usually a straight line, and sometimes increased attention to symptoms can temporarily make everything feel louder. Try not to turn the pain level into another test of whether you're getting better.
You don't have to successfully stop the pain, stop tensing, or stop being afraid before you can make progress. The practice is noticing what's happening, breathing, and gently returning your attention to life rather than continually monitoring the pain.
And please be kind to yourself. Taking care of toddlers while dealing with severe pain is genuinely hard. You don't have to prove anything by pushing through beyond what is reasonable.
When you notice yourself tensing in anticipation of the pain, you can gently acknowledge it: “There’s the fear and anticipation again.” Then bring your attention back to your breathing and to what is actually happening in this moment, rather than what you fear might happen with the next movement.
You might even make the goal much smaller. Instead of thinking, “I have to cook dinner while ignoring this pain,” think, “For the next minute, I’m going to breathe and stay present while I do this one thing.” Then another minute.
And importantly, I wouldn't interpret the increase in pain as proof that the programme isn't working. Recovery isn't usually a straight line, and sometimes increased attention to symptoms can temporarily make everything feel louder. Try not to turn the pain level into another test of whether you're getting better.
You don't have to successfully stop the pain, stop tensing, or stop being afraid before you can make progress. The practice is noticing what's happening, breathing, and gently returning your attention to life rather than continually monitoring the pain.
And please be kind to yourself. Taking care of toddlers while dealing with severe pain is genuinely hard. You don't have to prove anything by pushing through beyond what is reasonable.
Adam Coloretti (coach)
Well known member
Hi! After reading your story, did you end up getting that MRI, and what were the results? Also, you spoke of the 10% that don't take to this. I just want to make sure that you don't interpret that as 10% of people simply don't recover, because if you're quoting the statistic I think you're quoting, it's Dr Sarno's that 10% may need additional assistance in the form of psychotherapy. He's not saying that they don't recover, it just takes a different path.
Assuming that this is TMS, your chances of recovery are very good ( I say that about everyone with TMS because it's true, it has a much higher success rate than other chronic pain causes)
Thank you for this encouragement. I noticed in the educational program today it talked about being indifferent to the pain...that success is not necessarily measured by absence of pain. Every time the pain gets worse I'm so afraid it will be like this forever. So I'm working and praying to address, acknowledge, and let go of this fear.
The MRI is scheduled for next week Wednesday. Thank you so much for the encouragement. It does help to be reminded that there are some people who need additional help to overcome TMS.Hi! After reading your story, did you end up getting that MRI, and what were the results? Also, you spoke of the 10% that don't take to this. I just want to make sure that you don't interpret that as 10% of people simply don't recover, because if you're quoting the statistic I think you're quoting, it's Dr Sarno's that 10% may need additional assistance in the form of psychotherapy. He's not saying that they don't recover, it just takes a different path.
Assuming that this is TMS, your chances of recovery are very good ( I say that about everyone with TMS because it's true, it has a much higher success rate than other chronic pain causes)
Adam Coloretti (coach)
Well known member
My MRI results shows I have a lower lumbar protruding (herniated) disc that is specifically on the right side, and the doctor says this is why I have so much pain on the right side of my back and leg. I really want to believe this is TMS but I'm struggling because it seems like the right side herniation fits with the fact that I have pain on my right side. The good news is the MRI has ruled out anything serious. I did have two better days a few days ago where the pain wasn't debilitating, so that was really encouraging! But then yesterday was a really bad pain day again.
So I'm going to continue to do the TMS work and pray that I get better. Thank you for all the support on this site!
So I'm going to continue to do the TMS work and pray that I get better. Thank you for all the support on this site!
Adam Coloretti (coach)
Well known member
Hi @ashljunk
What did the doctor advise? I think you've said you've already tried physical therapy. Also, how long now have you had this pain?Dr. said I could start with steroid shots and see how that does. She said if that doesn't work typically they advise surgery.
I have had this specific low back/leg pain for one year. I have had what I am assuming is "TMS" pain since I was 20 (now I'm 38). When I discovered Nicole Sachs and started journaling, all of my chronic pain went away. Right after that pain went away, one morning I bent over to clean up a spill, and when I got back up my back immediately seized up and I could hardly move. Ever since then, I have had this pain, and despite journaling every day (and going through this structural educational program) it is not going away. Some days are better than others...so I'm guessing I just need to keep going and be patient. I just started reading Dr. Sarno's book, "Healing Back Pain", and hoping that can give me some insight too.
I have had this specific low back/leg pain for one year. I have had what I am assuming is "TMS" pain since I was 20 (now I'm 38). When I discovered Nicole Sachs and started journaling, all of my chronic pain went away. Right after that pain went away, one morning I bent over to clean up a spill, and when I got back up my back immediately seized up and I could hardly move. Ever since then, I have had this pain, and despite journaling every day (and going through this structural educational program) it is not going away. Some days are better than others...so I'm guessing I just need to keep going and be patient. I just started reading Dr. Sarno's book, "Healing Back Pain", and hoping that can give me some insight too.
According to Dr. Schubiner in his new Unlearn Your Pain book, the Mayo Clinic did a MRI study involving several thousand people all of whom had NO BACK PAIN. The people in the study varied in age from their 20s to their 80s. Since you are age 38 @ashljunk, I'll point out that 40% of those in their 30s had a bulging disc, and 50% of those in their 40s had a bulging disc. Since I am an octogenarian, I will add that 84% of those in their 80s had a bulging disc. (I suffered from chronic right-side low back pain from age 27 until age 51, when Dr. Sarno published Healing Back Pain. That book enabled me to end my back pain completely and for good.)
Schubiner summarized the MRI study as follows: "Recall that not one of the people in this study had any back pain. You can see that disc degeneration is common even in people in their twenties and thirties and becomes universal as people age. If disc degeneration occurs in this many people who have no pain, how can we assume that disc degeneration is the cause of back pain?"
He concluded: "It is now clear that these MRI findings are 'normal abnormalities' or a kind of graying or wrinkling of the spine. As we age most people develop gray hair sooner or later, and wrinkles in their skin. . . . If you had head or facial pain and went to your physician, what would you think if they told you that your pain was due to gray hair or wrinkles on you skin? In this scenario, you might be offered a [dye job or] facelift for chronic pain."
Schubiner summarized the MRI study as follows: "Recall that not one of the people in this study had any back pain. You can see that disc degeneration is common even in people in their twenties and thirties and becomes universal as people age. If disc degeneration occurs in this many people who have no pain, how can we assume that disc degeneration is the cause of back pain?"
He concluded: "It is now clear that these MRI findings are 'normal abnormalities' or a kind of graying or wrinkling of the spine. As we age most people develop gray hair sooner or later, and wrinkles in their skin. . . . If you had head or facial pain and went to your physician, what would you think if they told you that your pain was due to gray hair or wrinkles on you skin? In this scenario, you might be offered a [dye job or] facelift for chronic pain."
Ellen
Beloved Grand Eagle
This is similar to my story. I recovered from 20 years of fibromyalgia by treating it as TMS. I was symptom free for a while. Then one day I was bending over and my "back seized up" (not something that backs do I have learned except from a MindBody trigger). It took me a few weeks to realize I was having a relapse of TMS, but in a different form. I had to go even deeper in treating my TMS in this relapse than I did the first time. I think that those of us who are prone to TMS will always be prone to TMS. We have to be vigilant our whole lives and always question deeply any new symptoms that appear. The variety of TMS symptoms that my brain can throw at me is truly amazing. Each time I have a relapse, I'm convinced this new symptom is a "real" health issue. So far I am always wrong and end up finally admitting to myself that I am in fact having another relapse of TMS. As soon as I realize this fact, my recovery time is pretty short.
Adam Coloretti (coach)
Well known member
I think that's a good idea! No one can tell you on here for sure - is the doctor in question a specialist? Because usually if you see a specialist they'd be more forceful with the idea of surgery if it was absolutely necessary (like if the disc was pressing on a nerve sufficient enough for immediate action to be required - which can happen, but I doubt it in your case). How large is the herniation? If it's small to medium in size instead then it's unlikely to be the cause + it's true that chronic pain due to herniations just as a whole is rare.
As per the TMS guide "Persistent pain should rarely be attributed to these bulges and herniations".
What I would do is really analyse the FIT criteria (feel free to share how your story relates to each criterion) as this will also give you a better idea and help you rule in TMS
- https://www.themindbodyapproach.com/_files/ugd/bd131c_e66345ae74d6423f8a1c86a8a7774f3a.pdfI could not agree more, Ellen. You just described my situation perfectly.