Fear

[mikeinlondon]

Okay, so the TMS experts are saying that whatever we resist persists and we should allow. This is important especially in emotions where we allow our emotions ie we feel them instead of resisting them. Okay, that makes sense to me. However, we are also told that we shouldn’t fear our pain as it’s the fear that creates the loop within our brain to continue the fear-pain cycle. I think I understood that right. Now, here’s what I don’t understand. Fear is an emotion so isn’t that contradictory ie we should allow emotions so that we feel them but with the exception of fear ie fear isn’t an acceptable emotion to allow? I’m confused, can anyone elaborate or explain this to me?

 

[Diana-M]

I’m confused, can anyone elaborate or explain this to me?

Werewolf of London! It’s ok to feel your fear (and all your feelings) and acknowledge them. Just don’t be controlled by your fear or let it take over.

 

[Rusty Red]

I posted a series of images in Nicole's FB group yesterday that I saw that resonated with me about this and all feelings.

 

[JanAtheCPA]

Fear is an emotion

Just to confuse the issue even more (sorry) I will submit my contrarian point of view regarding this widely-held perception.

I can't remember where I came across this, because I know it's not an original thought - it was early in my TMS journey which started in 2011, and it immediately resonated with me. Which is :

Conscious (ie, obvious, or surface) FEAR (along with Anger) is NOT an emotion. It is a reaction. The reaction is designed to engage the fight-flight-freeze response of our physiological survival mechanism.

I struggled for a while with the difference between anger and Rage (a la Sarno, channeling Freud) and the personal explanation I came up with is that Rage encompasses a very deep, primitive, and unconscious (repressed) combination of dire fear and outrage surrounding the core issues of abandonment (especially in childhood) freedom (especially in adulthood) and mortality (frequently triggered in middle age).

When we consciously experience excessive fear (or express excessive anger) on the surface, I believe these are distractions, just like pain, to cover up the more serious emotional repression which is taking place.

Whenever I see surface manifestations of Fear and Anger being defined as emotions, I mentally add the word "shallow" in order to distinguish them in my mind from the deeper unconscious emotions that are actually being repressed.

Just one of many tools in my hodge-podge TMS toolkit.

 

[Joulegirl]

Ok @JanAtheCPA I think we need a TED talk on emotions! I have heard that fear was not an emotion. Same as anxiety. Is there any other one that gets confused as an emotion and is a reaction instead?

 

[mikeinlondon]

Just to confuse the issue even more (sorry) I will submit my contrarian point of view regarding this widely-held perception.

I can't remember where I came across this, because I know it's not an original thought - it was early in my TMS journey which started in 2011, and it immediately resonated with me. Which is :

Conscious (ie, obvious, or surface) FEAR (along with Anger) is NOT an emotion. It is a reaction. The reaction is designed to engage the fight-flight-freeze response of our physiological survival mechanism.

I struggled for a while with the difference between anger and Rage (a la Sarno, channeling Freud) and the personal explanation I came up with is that Rage encompasses a very deep, primitive, and unconscious (repressed) combination of dire fear and outrage surrounding the core issues of abandonment (especially in childhood) freedom (especially in adulthood) and mortality (frequently triggered in middle age).

When we consciously experience excessive fear (or express excessive anger) on the surface, I believe these are distractions, just like pain, to cover up the more serious emotional repression which is taking place.

Whenever I see surface manifestations of Fear and Anger being defined as emotions, I mentally add the word "shallow" in order to distinguish them in my mind from the deeper unconscious emotions that are actually being repressed.

Just one of many tools in my hodge-podge TMS toolkit.

interesting take but it contradicts what Google says ie that emotions are in fact reactions:

Emotions are conscious mental reactions (such as anger or fear) subjectively experienced as strong feelings usually directed toward a specific object and typically accompanied by physiological and behavioral changes in the body.

In conclusion I think I’ve opened up a can of worms and I’m even more confused than ever as I can see both sides of the argument.

 

[dlane2530]

See what works for you. What you want is to convince your brain that fear isn't dangerous. If that means accepting and allowing it, great. If that means visualizing yourself riding along a cliff on a motorcycle at top speed and using a club to whack fear off the edge, do that. The main thing is to take away the sense of paralysis and danger. Some people find going loose in response to fear is the key; others find that getting excited about the adrenaline it brings works better.

Here, for example, are two excellent but different ways to handle a panic attack:

AND

Both work.

 

[mikeinlondon]

See what works for you. What you want is to convince your brain that fear isn't dangerous. If that means accepting and allowing it, great. If that means visualizing yourself riding along a cliff on a motorcycle at top speed and using a club to whack fear off the edge, do that. The main thing is to take away the sense of paralysis and danger. Some people find going loose in response to fear is the key; others find that getting excited about the adrenaline it brings works better.

Here, for example, are two excellent but different ways to handle a panic attack:

AND

Both work.

Thanks, Diane. I'll look into these. I recall watching a video somewhere by someone who said the problem isn't the FEAR itself but the FEAR of the FEAR. Perhaps that links into Jan's message about deep vs shallow fear? So, perhaps, allowing the FEAR is the correct response but don't fear it i.e. allow the fear emotion to bathe you ... don't resist it ... just don't fear that emotion .... float through it. I think that's what you mean when you say "Just don’t be controlled by your fear or let it take over".

 

[mikeinlondon]

FYI - Was just watching Dan's videos on YT and he said TMS pain is like, when you realise, the bear in the woods is actually a cardboard cut-out and the FEAR is ... False Evidence Appearing Real. The pain may be excruciating but, at the end of the day, it's a false alarm.

 

[Diana-M]

So, perhaps, allowing the FEAR is the correct response but don't fear it i.e. allow the fear emotion to bathe you ... don't resist it ... just don't fear that emotion .... float through it. I think that's what you mean when you say "Just don’t be controlled by your fear or let it take over".

Yes! That’s it!

 

[Cactusflower]

“Conscious (ie, obvious, or surface) FEAR (along with Anger) is NOT an emotion. It is a reaction. The reaction is designed to engage the fight-flight-freeze response of our physiological survival mechanism.”

@JanAtheCPA is correct, however anger is an emotion if it not held on to. Anger like other emotions felt and released within minutes is an emotion. The resentful kind of anger that becomes stuck as a state of mind eg. “the angry guy” Hanscom talks about in his work, isn’t emotion but a defense mechanism. We’re seeing a lot of this coming to the surface in the world today.