I'm having a lot of fear and sadness coming up. The anger keeps melting into a deep sadness, or fears. Today, I had the thought of exercising later today and just the thought sent terror through my body, and took me some time to calm down. According to a few tests I've done, and my history, I think i'm going through a mild anxiety disorder- and wonder if medicating would impact my ability to do TMS work. I fit the profile of mild anxiety and mild depression. Sadness I'd say from multiple events in the past that have been so painful- close to a decade of pain including losing my father when I was ten. Fear because of what my own graph of the past predicts for the future, and a lot of current stresses that if unresolved, could become future nightmares. So that's what I'm finding. There is a lot of anger, and then it melts into sadness and fear. I'm also on Day 12 of the Pain Recovery Program, and today was on Cognitive soothing. That was really helpful. I just started doing affirmations yesterday at the top of the hour, mostly to help me calm down and check in with giving myself as a sense of safety and belief in the TMS Diagnosis. It has been helping. The constant feeling of discouragement and 'this will never end' is less today. But learning to say to myself "I am safe, everything will be okay, is good"