Depression

My pain wasn't too bad today and when I did feel some pain I was almost relieved because it would get my mind off of feeling bummed out. I had also received very little sleep the night before and I've noticed being sleep deprived is a cause of depression for me.

I seem to feel really, really, down in the gutter about twice or three times a month and it sucks! It's like being mentally hungover and having no motivation to do anything and feeling miserable about everything and terrified about the future. In my case, it is related to feelings of worthlessness and feelings of a total inability to cope. I am getting better at identifying when I am feeling mentally crappy but wish I could find some better ways of coping with it.

TMSwiki community seem to have the best solutions for chronic pain and anxiety so they probably will have something good for depression too.

Thanks

 

Give it to the big man upstairs. That's what I do. My whole life i was a total agnostic. Having a relationship with a higher power is crucial for my tms recovery. I can identify with everything you said. It takes practice but anything is possible. I can not make it in this world alone. With him all is possible. I hope you have the best day today that you could possibly have. Emmet fox books helped a lot I would highly recommend " power through constructive thinking".

 

Hi, Mr. Rage. Brendan has given you wonderful advice. Give your anger to God. He will lift you out of your depression. I find meditation to help lift me up when I need lifting up.

I knew a priest who told me that he had problems with the church hierarchy and "tossed the ball" to God and let him solve the problems.

Meditation is a time-honored way of relaxing the mind and relieving anxiety, mental stress, headaches, and even physical pain. There are many ways to practice meditation, but many consider the most successful to be a technique called the Relaxation Response (RR).

It is a wonderful way to practice TMS Mindbody Healing because it changes harmful thinking in the subconscious mind which Dr. John Sarno says causes pain that is not caused by anything structural.

The RR, practiced once twice a day for 10, 15, or 20 minutes has a profound positive effect on the subconscious mind, relieving or curing everything from anxiety, hypertension, headaches, fatigue, nervousness, dizziness, high blood pressure, insomnia, stomach problems, all forms of pain including backaches, abdominal pain, muscle pain, neck, arm, and leg pain, and relieves side affects from cancer and AIDS.

RR is like Transcendental Meditation which is taught by TM specialists who charge hundreds or thousands of dollars. But the RR is free and you can do it yourself.

It is practiced, before a meal, and works best if not practiced within two hours after a meal. I do it in bed before arising in the morning and again in bed before falling sleep. Often, I only do it 5 or 10 minutes and it works to calm me and put me to sleep.

Just sit in a chair (or lie in bed in the morning or at bedtime), close your eyes, don’t listen to any music, and try to avoid outside noises. Let your mind think of a word such as "One " which has no real meaning or association. Or say a calming word such as “Calm” or “Peace,” or add the faith or spiritual element by saying a favorite religious word or prayer. Breathe naturally or incorporate Deep Breathing by breathing in through the mouth to inflate the stomach, suck in the stomach while holding the breath for a few seconds, then say the word when you exhale through the mouth.

I practice the RR using this mantra: "God loves me and is protecting me." I believe He is protecting me from physical and emotional or financial stress.

Say the word or words silently over and over. At the end of the 10 to 20 minutes, picture and feel yourself as you were when you felt your best, and in a place where you felt that way.

When distracting thoughts arise during the RR, as they will, just tell yourself, “Oh, well,” and go back to repeating your chosen word.

There are several free videos on Youtube about the Relaxation Response. I especially recommend these two by Dr. Benson:

 

I know how you feel. If you're doing the work you will go through things. It happened to me. For me journaling was my saving grace. Steve O says in his book that depression is a cry to be heard. Journaling gave me the opportunity to be heard. Knowledge about tms and of yourself. You will heal.....

 

Thanks for the links, Walt.

Does anyone here know about the condition "Tarlov" My aunt was diagnosed with it today and she believes it is causing her pain. I wonder if this is another tms type thing or not?

 

This sucks! My TMS isn't nearly as bad as it was in March, 2016 when I first discovered Sarno. My back pain is mostly gone but I have still been getting TMS equivalent headaches a lot. I keep falling into depression. I haven't been journaling and this might be part of the problem. Right now, I'm feeling so-so. But this evening I was feeling hopelessly depressed. I haven't had this type of horrible depression in a long time although the depression isn't anything new. I was depressed like this roughly a year ago and I was also depressed for months when I was 19 years old. At least I am better able to cope with it now then when I was 19. Nowadays, the depression seems to last for a few hours in the evening time. There was a period when I was 19 where the depression dragged on for months and months with almost no pause. Also, I have nobody in my life who I feel comfortable sharing this with. And almost no social life or any other type of life.

I can't believe how much TMS and depression have altered the course of my life. I imagine that it is like being released from prison and having no idea how to get started again. I'd say I am at the stage now where I'm in prison eagerly but also anxiously awaiting my release.

Hopefully, if I start applying the Relaxation Response as a routine I will be able to see more results.

 

I did have one interesting experience during one of my recent bouts of depression. I was feeling angry and bitter when suddenly a horrible childhood event flashed into my head. I got so angry that I started to grit my teeth and punch my pillow. It was a real release. By the time I got over it I was breathing heavily, chuckling to myself, and my headache had disappeared. It was one of those rare moments of joy. Just typing this out makes me feel like a lunatic LOL

 

https://rarediseases.info.nih.gov/gard/9258/tarlov-cysts/case/27316/case-questions.Here is the link to Tarlov condition.

 

What a great release! And what a perfect demonstration that the pain is TMS. When my headaches come, I frequently don't know and can't easily uncover the source of the tension. You're definitely making progress.

 

Hi, I remember one of your posts about anger and I thought about you while I was reading the Great Pain Deception this morning. You posted about being very angry once right? The book talked about anger and how the best way to deal with it is forgiveness. Have you read that book?
Also, check out this book on Depression. It helped me a lot.
https://www.amazon.com/Depression-Cure-6-Step-Program-without/dp/0738213888/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1466544598&sr=1-1&keywords=the+depression+cure (The Depression Cure: The 6-Step Program to Beat Depression without Drugs: Stephen S. Ilardi: 9780738213880: Amazon.com: Books)

 

I noticed today that I have not been having the "hemorrhoid pain" I have mentioned in earlier posts. And I also have had very little pain in my wrists. And much of my back pain is also gone. What was interesting is that I had a pain in my right knee for a couple of days but I didn't freak out, reasoning that I had either slept on it wrong and it would go away within a day or that it was just another manifestation of TMS. I still don't know which of the two was the cause but my knee isn't bothering me anymore.

However, I have been nervous and fearful. I have had horrible feelings of anxiety and depression.. I am getting better at remembering that when I have depressing thoughts, they are just a manifestation of a current frame of mind and not necessarily representative of reality. It's like wearing tinted sunglasses, but the tint is depression and it makes me feel hopeless. I did have a genuinely good five minutes a few days ago, watching the sun set and feeling strangely optimistic about life.

I will read Claire Weeke's book soon.

My pain levels are definitely way down from late March, 2016. Now it's becoming more and more of a challenge and less suffering is involved.

I will probably be way more busy in the future and have less time to spend on the internet. So expect less posts from me. But I am determined to reach a full recovery or the closest thing possible. Failure is no longer an option. Once I accomplish my goals, I will try and give back to this helpful community.

 

Claire weeks book is good. I got it from the library.

 

Her book is outstanding and I am feeling very optimistic that I will be completely pain free as time goes on. Just apply the steps for dealing with depression and anxiety to dealing with TMS pain.
"Face the pain" - As soon as you feel pain in your body, focus on the pain and remember the root cause of the pain.
"Accept the pain" - Accept that it is your unconscious mind that is the root cause of the pain. Accept that you have the pain. Don't try to change it. Understand the source of your pain and you will no longer fear it.
"Float it" - When pain arises, face it and then accept it and then allow yourself to relax into it. Don't allow the pain to dictate who you are or what you do. Don't limit yourself because of the pain. The pain is only a temporary sensation. You will outlive your TMS pain if you understand that you will outlive it.

I have recently been meditating in an upright position. Even after discovering the works of Dr. Sarno in March, 2016, meditating in an upright position was always an activity that was incredibly difficult for me to complete. After Claire Weeke's book, my unconscious mind spends the first fifteen minutes trying to focus attention on my body. I face this phenomenon of the unconscious and accept it and try to remain calm despite it. Eventually, the unconscious gives up and the remaining time meditating is peaceful and easy to complete. It is important, however, to remember the concept of outcome independence. Some days will be easy. Others days will be difficult.

 

Claire Weeke's book is the best in the business in my opinion. The works of Dr. Sarno have also been wonderful but this short book by Claire Weeke is really powerful. I highly recommend it for anyone who has finished reading "The Divided Mind.". Her method for dealing with stress is also effective for dealing with unconscious rage. I am feeling more and more positive as the days continue.

The biggest challenge for me is trying to reframe my perception when I first wake up. It seems that if I can try and deal with my negative emotions the minute I wake up, the chances that the rest of the day will go well are far higher. I wake up, feel like shit, feel bitter, feel angry. Then I remember to remember that I am feeling angry, bitter, etc. Then I accept that I am feeling this way. Then I "float it." Then I'll usually, but not always, start to calm down and feel better. It doesn't work every time but we have to remember the concept of outcome independence.