Day 30 - changed relationships; anyone else?

Archie

Archie

Peer Supporter
hi, if anyone has read my previous posts you may realise that I started ALOT longer ago than 30 days!!! However, this is part of me bring kind to myself - taking off the p ressure of "you must do a day of the programme each and every day, and not miss a single one, and also do it brilliantly" !
So, at day 30 is the reflection on how the programme has changed my significant relationships, and I decided to post my thoughts to see if anyone else has had a similar experience . Firstly I have to say that following the programme has been very positive - I am less of a people-pleaser, I have found reservoirs of rage, my voice is stronger, and I am less afraid to challenge the status quo. However, I have also become more easily irritated, bad-tempered, and less tolerant of my nearest and dearest, and for a while, whilst the pendulum spun in the opposite direction, things were hard-going with my husband. Things are settling down, but I am not the person I was, and for those who are close to me and used to a very "nice, easy-going, tolerant" person, it has been hard at times. Mercifully, I have a wonderful husband who supports the process and accepts the slightly different me, but it may have been otherwise.
Had anyone had a similar experience?
 
Hi, I'm really happy for you, this is great!

Yes, I did! I started actually to be more like myself in the last month or 6 weeks to be exact. I used to be like that when I was a child, more assertive in a way and with a stronger voice, not so much a people-pleaser, now I'm more without fear nor judgment. I did not become more irritated inside or outside, this I did not experienced. I could say on the contrary I think I'm more calm and at peace with myself and others. I accept them as they are. My husband is very pleased about these changes and I'm very happy as well. Plus, the bonus is that I'm not in pain anymore as I used to be. I do feel my lower back more tense sometimes when I have stress in my life and there is even pain other times but everything is manageable these days. And I don't think about it, this is very very important!
 
Sita said:
Hi, I'm really happy for you, this is great!

Yes, I did! I started actually to be more like myself in the last month or 6 weeks to be exact. I used to be like that when I was a child, more assertive in a way and with a stronger voice, not so much a people-pleaser, now I'm more without fear nor judgment. I did not become more irritated inside or outside, this I did not experienced. I could say on the contrary I think I'm more calm and at peace with myself and others. I accept them as they are. My husband is very pleased about these changes and I'm very happy as well. Plus, the bonus is that I'm not in pain anymore as I used to be. I do feel my lower back more tense sometimes when I have stress in my life and there is even pain other times but everything is manageable these days. And I don't think about it, this is very very important!
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Thankyou Sita, I am assuming that eventually my irritability will pass as more healing occurs - it really has been a very rocky road, but happily, a very positive one in the outcome. It is just amazing how much those repressed emotions can affect us in negative ways, and then when "found" , how much that process affects us in positive ways. :)
 
Yes yes, you are right! And it's so amazing what we can do. I, for instance, just have to keep my mind clean ... so to speak. No negative thoughts, never if possible. It's not easy, I have to admit. But is quite liberating to practice this. I'm building a new habit, a good one this time. Have a great day!
 
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