Day 25 Apprehension

I haven't posted for a while because I'm not making progress. I have been working through the Structured Educational Program, reading the daily educational program and writing my responses to the Journaling and Question to Ponder exercises. I'm losing faith in the diagnosis, or at least its applicability to me. I would much rather be making progress like the people in the success stories I've been reading. I can see myself in some of the personality characteristics. I have stressors in my life that coincide with the pain, but I'm not thoroughly convinced they cause the pain. The pain really scares me.

 

Rest assured we all go through these phases, especially in the early days. Truly understanding TMS and the ways it manifests in your body can take time which is just one reason to nurture patience.

Ease back on your time frames and expectations and derive some comfort from the fact that this forum is rich with advice and resources.

It has taken me a long time to reach the point where I can say I am unequivocally healing. I gave up on the whole TMS shebang for two years but continued to nurture and soothe my nervous system. By the time I returned I was ready to heal and completely understood how I had created my pain.

Pain is scary. Getting past that fear is one of the biggest steps of all. For me that rested on two things; Claire Weekes and ruling out anything wrong. I needed to know that I was essentially physically fine before I could authentically make the leap of faith.

The other that really helped me was reading David Hanscom's book. He writes on the importance of calming a frazzled nervous system and I found it to be true. Sleep is the best circuit-breaker for pain for me.

Maybe you would fare well with approaches that describe TMS from a neurological viewpoint. Aside from Hanscom, Dr. Schubiner does this. It makes relating your pain to your emotions and circumstance more tangible.

Above all, chin up. We all get there in the end.

Plum x