Day 1

Hi,

Today is day 1 of the Structured Educational Recovery Program for me. I read Week 0 and went thru the whole other recovery program yesterday...listened to all the calls & watched the video. I completely relate to the drill sergeant guy & the girl who needs validation of her self-worth with accomplishments. My parents were not like that so I am not sure where I picked that up. That just started for me within the last 10 years or so I think. I am 36 now. I have always been a "neat freak" & worrier though I think.
I posted my list of ailments on my profile (if I even covered it all, being so long & complicated & overlapping with different ailments) so I won't get into all that here but I did receive a lot of help from SOME of the physical treatments, but not all. I have been way worse but some of it just sticks around & moves around. For that reason I was having trouble accepting the diagnosis. I was diagnosed by Dr. Schubiner yesterday just by him reading my story. I was still having some doubts though but after going thru the online materials yesterday I know TMS is it & I have a lot of work to do. Dr. Schubiner replied to my doubts today too...what a kind man. Alan Gordon also replied to me yesterday & agrees & recommended a counselor for me to Skype with as I am in San Antonio, TX. I am thinking about it & think I should at least try it. One of my worries is about money though & I have spent so much on useless treatments already. I am worth it though & I want to heal for sure.
I actually heard about Dr. Sarno's book a couple of years ago & thought it sounded silly. Then I bought the book about 6 weeks ago & finally started reading it 2 weeks ago out of desperation...only to finish it within 3 days & feel miraculously better at about page 30. I went a whole day with almost no pain while reading it. I haven't had a waking moment without pain in almost 3 years...such a miracle. It didn't last though & it has been very emotional for me. I have watched many YouTube videos to help me. There is a series videos my a young man named Kareem that really spoke to me. I am so thankful for him sharing his story & I am so thankful for the free program on this site...along with all the other endless material. Now I just wonder if I work this thru on my own or seek professional help...but like I said, I will at least try it. I will only become a better person. I am looking forward to this long overdue growth process. ~ Stefanie

 

Hey Stef-

Welcome to the SEP and the start of a new pain-free life. I glanced over your story and I can relate - I too have herniated disks, scoliosis, etc.... basically just normal wear and tear, as Dr Sarno states. It takes a while for us to break the belief in modern medicine into which we've been indoctrinated, but it can be done. I did the SEP, finished it 2 weeks ago, and am 100% pain free.... this after 6 months of horrible pain everyday, especially when walking or standing. I couldn't walk more than a block without nearly crying, nor could I stand up straight for more than one minute! All the other stuff wasn't working, the PT, chiropractor, medication, acupuncture....there'd sometimes be brief relief, but the pain quickly returned. It wasn't until I started this program, reading the books, journaling, etc. that I began to see real progress. For me, I also had to start psychotherapy because I had/have some deep things from my childhood. The recovery was a bit slow, but patience and self kindness are essential. I'm still seeing the therapist because I aim to address these things and be cured, although I also realize that this experience is a journey sans final destination, that is, addressing emotions is a life-long necessity. But I've learned the tools here and for me journaling is a fantastic way to get in touch with repressed emotions and let them out, without hurting anyone, including myself.

Anyhow, I can't speak highly enough of the SEP. Just set your mind to finish it, no matter what the result, you won't be disappointed. Good luck on your journey, be kind, patient and gentle with yourself and keep up a positive mental attitude (PMA)!

Kev

 

Hi, Stef and Kev. A wonderful exchange of posts. I too know from healing experience that TMS works. It's actually amazing, how realizing our pain is not structural but caused by repressed emotions and/or our personality can make the pain go away. The SEP really does guide us from pain to healing.

Stef, TMS knowledge is going to make you a better person all-around, both healthier and happier.

One thing I suggest to everyone posting is, to say something nice to someone. It's a fantastic morale-builder for the receiver and wonderful too for the sender. A grammar school teacher in Texas emailed me last week saying her K-6 grade pupils love one of my children's books and she and her own children did too, when they were kids. It made more than my day, it made my year. We are emailing each other every day now and I'm learning more about what kids want to read, to get them away from video games. So saying something nice can be wonderful for everyone.

 

Thank you Kev...your kind words mean a lot. Yes, I am having a spiritual awakening & it's amazing!!!! I started journaling just a few days ago & I remember thinking "I don't know how to journal...I don't know what to write." Boy do I know how to journal!! I started writing & it just POURED out of me.
I am continuing the program...no doubt. I may talk to a therapist as well...seriously considering it. This whole website is just such a blessing though.

 

Oh Walt, that is fabulous. So you are a writer? I will look you up online...I really admire that. I agree...I already feel like a better person (as I commented in my other reply to you)...a spiritual awakening. Funny thing happened today...I was driving home & passed by a park. There was just some random guy in the parking lot that had his whole drumset set up & was just jamming out having the most lovely time. I honked to show my pleasure since that just made my day for some reason (I mean, that takes courage in the 100 degree heat here in Texas...guy must've REALLY wanted to play his drums ya know?). Well, I thought "I really need to tell him how much joy he just brought me" So I turned around & drove back, parked & told him so & gave him $5. He was beaming. I got his picture (attached) & he took a pic with me. It was wonderful. I will never forget him. I didn't even hear his music that he was playing...it didn't matter...music is a celebration of life & therein lies the magic!