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Nat2223

New Member
Hello everyone,
I have been suffering from chronic back pain for 18 years now. I had a fusion l5 s1 in 2002. About a year ago my pain started to increase. Not sure why. It got so bad I had to give up my part time job. I have tried everything to cure this pain. Chirp, ostiotherapy, physio, tens, medications, heating pad, etc. I have had ct Scans and a MRI. The only thing showing is degeneration. My dr Said the amount I have is to be expected for a 43 yr old.
I read John sarno's book in the past and thought nothing of it. Now I am thinking it is my last option. I'm going to give this a 100%. I am a prisioner in my home and I want to get back to my life. I have hopes and dreams that I'm always thinking of. My back consumes me. It' what people talk about when they see me. I want that to change.
This is a 90% success rate so why not. My only concern is I'm really not sure what I am holding on to. What is causing my tension? I did separate from my spouse of 26 years 2 years ago. Is it that? Have I not gotten over that? I found a great guy so why would I be struggling with my past? I have a hard time letting anything go. If anyone says something that hurts my feeling I hold on to that. Is it that?
I worry about money and my future. My kids future. Is it that? Is it everything?
 
Hi Nat2223,

I am a former lower back sufferer having recovered from lower back pain in the year 2000. In those days (before TMS forums), I just had a copy of Healing Back Pain and Dr. Sarno’s video tapes. I made an unusual recovery from the severe back spasms and chronic back ache that dominated my life. Your story reminded me of how I became a prisoner on the couch with a heating pad.

I remember reading Healing back pain for the first time. I threw it across the room in sheer terror and disbelief. I wasn’t allowed to think psychologically this way. I considered it a weakness to recognize my feelings, let alone address some of the unfortunate issues that were going on in my life. Eventually perhaps a year later I reread HBP again and became hooked. This was my “last resort”. My wife helped me immensely when she read the whole book to me out loud. It was the weekend and I was able to focus on her spoken content.

My unusual recovery came the following weekend. It was unusual because unconventionally I went for a jog and ran in severe pain, it wasn’t fun, and I would not recommend doing this. Most importantly what took place was the removal of fear that I had something wrong with me. Here is a link with the story.

http://www.tmshelp.com/forum/topic.asp?TOPIC_ID=7141 (TMSHelp Forum - Success from 2000)


Nat2223, it is wonderful that you are asking questions where your tension lies. I have seen many people never ask these questions, as they become focused on one thing: “Their Pain”. They write thread after thread about their physical MRIs, doctor’s visits and severity of their issues and remain in pain. I am proof that is possible to recover without knowing the exact causes of my psychological pain. Note the date of recovery is 2000 and I started blogging on the TMS Help and this website in 2011, eleven years later.

One of my discoveries was when Dr. Sarno mentioned the three areas of emotional issues were derived from “Past, Present and Personality” or a combination of all three.

http://tmshelp.com/forum/topic.asp?TOPIC_ID=7787&SearchTerms=three

Since writing this post in 2011, I have been able to understand where my own issues lie, that is my personality and society life style, for in retirement at the age of 70, I consider that we all a little mad, driving around in tin boxes with cell phones in hand, in essence every part of our lives are tension inducing, to say nothing of work and family pressures.

My back is only troublesome when I abuse it. I consider it controllable with Yoga and mindfulness. In the eleven years from 2000 to 2011 my neck gradually became bothersome as the TMS personality will find a new location, possibly age related.

I don’t know much about back fusions, but get the impression you have been checked out well.

Good luck.
 
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