Day 1 - TMS Newbie

After 7 years of opioid painkillers, 3 years of chronic fatigue syndrome and idiopathic neuropathy, I have stumbled onto Dr. John Sarno. I have read his first book, and then bought Steve Ozanich's, "The Great Pain Deception." My personality fits the profile to a tee and I believe TMS is my issue. I have had had some emotional upheaval over the past 10 years and am seeing that these are the drivers behind my pain. I am glad to have found this site and am beginning the Educational program today.

I have prepared by getting off all medications and am about 5 weeks out from ending my last opioid. Though I am still experiencing some PAWS, I trust the withdrawal mayhem has subsided enough to start this process.

Physical symptoms: Began as sciatic pain, but doc diagnosed me with left SI joint pain, reason unknown. As pain meds helped, I developed debilitating chronic fatigue and neuropathy. Since reading Sarno, becoming more active again and quitting opioid meds, my back pain is mostly manageable (though not yet gone), the chronic fatigue is much better - mostly gone - but the neuropathy has become more intense. From what I am seeing in the books and on the forum, this seems to be a fairly normal progression of symptoms migrating...I hope!

I must admit, I still struggle with anticipation of pain when walking or initiating more physical activity, which seems to be a conditioned pain response for me, but I am making myself do it. I am somewhat concerned that my buy-in is so far only intellectual. I joined this site hoping to find more practical help in moving to complete belief, effecting my healing.

 

Congratulations on all that you've already accomplished. Starting the SEP and participating in this Forum are great ways to find the practical help you are seeking.

Welcome to the Forum! You are on the right path.

 

I'm fairly new to all this myself, and I too see the connection to that 'conditioned response'. My issue was believing that my forward head posture was the cause of my frequent and sometimes constant headaches. But when I began to accept that my pain was not caused by any physical position, I forced myself to stay for a while in the awkward positions I had tried so hard to avoid. While doing so, I told myself to just relax in every way possible. Sometimes I would smile or laugh while in the position- anything to try to see if I could make the pain go away with a mental image or thought. It has worked very well so far, and that is what is helping me to accept my TMS on a gut level. Also, I've been trying to think of the aches and pains I have left in an emotional light. This has been another helpful strategy for understanding my TMS on a gut level. When you begin to feel the pain rise with a negative emotion, then you know what is happening and there's no need to think of your TMS diagnosis on an intellectual level. You just know, and then you can treat it accordingly. Sounds like you're already moving in the right direction. Don't be afraid to experiment- use your conscious mind to reprogram those unconscious reactions. It just takes time.

Hope this helps.

 

Hi, MikeKnapp. You're making good progress toward TMS healing. You might spend some time with Dr. Sarno's 12 Daily Reminders .

I especially like this extended version:


Herbie’s Extended Version of Dr. Sarno’s 12 DAILY REMINDERS

1. The pain is due to TMS. This is real pain or anxiety but it is caused by subconscious tensions and triggers, stressors and traits to your reactions and fears and also when at boiling point your conscious tension can and does also cause real pain.
2. The main reason for the pain is mild oxygen deprivation. This means that when you get in pain or anxiety then the blood is restricted from going to your lower back, for instance. The blood being restricted causes oxygen deprivation which causes the pain. Remember, where there is no oxygen then there is pain in the body. Also, the pain stays because of fear.
3. TMS is a harmless condition caused by my REPRESSED EMOTIONS so even though you think you can harm yourself from the years of pain you have felt and how you feel in general -- so far no reports have been heard from TMS healing knowledge causing damage to anyone, it only helps.
4. The principle emotion is your repressed ANGER -- this means under your consciousness lies something that happens automatically to everyone. TMSers have repressions that are stored because of our personality traits, traumas, stressors, fears, strain, etc... When these stored repressions build and build, then eventually they cause the brain to send pain into your body to keep you from having an emotional crises. The mind-body thinks it is helping you.
5. TMS exists to DISTRACT your attentions from the emotions, stressors, tensions and strains of your personality traits because if you can get distraction then you won’t have to be in emotional turmoil. When you don't face and feel your emotions and they get repressed because you didn't want to deal with something -- they are just adding up in this beaker, ready to pour over and create real pain and anxiety in your body.
6. Since my body is perfectly normal, there is nothing to fear. So in reality when I fear the pain or anxiety I just cause myself undo strain and tension adding to the beaker of pain. If I fear, then I feed the pain, If I fear, it’s impossible to recondition. Fear keeps the pain and anxiety alive in the body through focus.
7. Therefore, physical activity is harmless. If I want to work against the pain I could but it’s better to lose some of the pain so when I start my life over I have to be in pain trying to heal because facing the repressions and all the other activities that cause the pain and reversing my fear and focus to them, then I can heal.
8. I am resuming all normal physical activity. I don't fear moving anymore. I believe in my body’s ability to heal now. I can move as I want. I will not fear moving with a bent back anymore. I will also practice going out and acting normal again, not in fear of what pain might do to me.
9. The pain is unimportant and powerless. Its only power is how it is hidden -- its illusion, its fear.
10. I will keep my attention on the emotional issues. I will think about my emotions and feel my emotions throughout the day. I will not judge, criticize or fear my emotions. I will not run from my emotional issues but face every one of them. I will feel my emotions fully and cry if I need to. Then I will release the emotion and get my mind and thoughts back to my life and living in the present.
11. I am in control of all of this. This is how I recover.
12. I will be thinking PSYCHOLOGICALLY AT ALL TIMES. This means I will keep my thoughts on psychological issues like happiness, fear and anger -- traits and triggers, conditioning and journaling -- The science behind mind-body/TMS healing, etc.... This way I will not feed my thoughts to the body -- that is a trick of TMS. TMS will always try to get me to focus on the body caused by the pain until I break its show and flair. When I get my attention off physical symptoms and on to emotional issues and psychological issues then I will not feed the fear of the physical issues anymore, thus making the TMS of no pain effect on the body. This will in return, give us the cure and become pain-free.