Hi I have never joined a forum in my life but am doing it today out of hope and desperation. I am now 12 weeks into a severe attack of sciatica and leg pain that I am really trying to believe is TMS despite the obvious scan result of herniated disc! I have been signed off work most of that time. It makes so much sense to me but at the moment I feel like I should just be able to will the pain away instantly so I'm frustrated. I have been in bed most of the last 3 days and that hasn't happened before I was always getting up. It coincided with me trying to return to work unsuccessfully for a second time. I went to work OK but was on the floor over the weekend. Obviously an emotional connection right! It became so clear to me how much I hate my job now. It bears no resemblance to the job i qualified to do. I am a teacher and my school has been through the ringer with Ofsted inspectors these last 2 years. I can no longer stand the pressure, guilt and feelings of disempowerment. I have stuffed it down thru run ins with colleagues and managers and seeing people much more stupid than me get promoted and take control in idiotic ways that have nothing to do with supporting children. On top of this I have had 2 family bereavements this year and another elderly relative has been in hospital, needs more help and showing early dementia signs. I have tried to struggle through and help as much as I can and I also have a seven year old son. Today I feel I can do no more as just going to the toilet is agony. I am so ashamed and embarrassed. I hope there can be a way out. I had to be in a caring role from a young age as my mother was an alcoholic and prescription drug addict so I ran around after her and took care of my brother. Now I see it all happening again. And ironically I am becoming her as I am bed bound and see my son's concern and desire for me to be well. I guess my body is telling me i' m angry at having to be responsible. Is quitting my job a good idea at this point? Any advice appreciated.