Thanks Andy. I really appreciated all your support last time I was here. Yes....I have checked Alan Gordon's Recovery Program out a little. I will look into it more closely.
I came over a lot of stress this past summer, then it was amplified when Football Season had started. I knew what I had to do, so I went on auto-pilot. This is my way of separating myself from my emotions and inner chatter. I basically cut myself off from my emotions, then run on adrenalin, allowing my insecurities and anxieties to push me to higher levels of success. I have always dealt with stress like this, but in the end, it leaves me with feelings of emptiness. Not saying this to brag, but I just led our Team to their second State Championship in a row, and I could not really take it in and enjoy it. We have won 5 in the past 10 years, and I can recall only one that I actually enjoyed. Don't get me wrong, I really appreciate how hard my Players work for me, and the success I have been allowed to accomplish, but it is the compulsiveness and my insecurities that drive my TMS. Actually, it is my fears of not being able to succeed or do things that drive my TMS.
Anyway, I am aware that it is my fears and anxieties that keep me in the cycle. I have taken steps to overcome this in my own way. I just finished equipping my own home gym (even though I love Strength Training, I become very apprehensive, because of my fears of overtraining, or even training exasperating my pain). I started a new training cycle, including heavy Deadlifts, etc. Og course at the beginning of the week, I was in major pain, then decided to push thru. I was in extreme pain, then something clicked yesterday, and it dawned on me what was causing my pain....the fear of heavy lifting and deadlifts. Once I realized this, my pain really diminished. I am getting ready to do heavy deadlifts again today, and I feel confident. That just amazes me, how powerful our unconscious brain can be. It seems for me, it is overcoming my fear of pain is driving my TMS. The more confident I become with myself, the better I feel.
Anyway, sorry to go on and on, but I feel as if I am remembering what was helping so much the last time I did the SEP, and this has helped me tremendously. I hope this can help others in some way. I sincerely believe that our fears are a major contributor to TMS.
Again, thank you Andy for your support.