Hi everyone, I came into contact with the 'term TMS' since 3 months ago, and started the structured educational program 3 weeks ago. Today is in day 15. Briefly explain my problem: young thirties, severe scoliosis, great muscle tension on one side, psoas is also very tight. Problems: - After 2 weeks, the program says: I'm starting to recognize the fears that start to cause TMS... But that's not the case for the time being. - I've been meditating for a while but it's hard to do it.. I do it and do it as I should but don't notice any special things. 1: I read on TMS that through the meditating certain things come to mind and these are processed. 2: I read an article on TMS by someone who advised going into the pain while meditating, so that according to him your body will spontaneously tell you what is bothering you - I do have a good idea for myself which things keep me mentally occupied (acceptance back, physical limitations, being different from the rest, relationship that runs less, wanting to pretend to be different than I am). (past bullying seems to have been processed, I have written them all down but I can no longer relive the feeling and do not lose sleep over it). But even though I am aware of them, and I write them in the diary, I notice no change. My daytime activities are always the same. Work, take a walk in the afternoon, then go back to work, in the evening with the children. Sometimes also work on Saturdays. Sitting: no pain. Walking/Standing immediate pain (resembling heavy muscle strain). -I think psychologically, and now try to do that as much as possible. But the curvature (skew) is of course there... Pain has been there for many years (I can hardly remember any other time). - The underlying issues are not yet visible... How then? Why is meditation not working? - Pain stays in one place and never shifts. - Perhaps more importantly: I don't have access to my emotions... I know myself as emotionless (indifferent, hard to love partner = falling in love, never crying). I always stay on the same level... My body wants to tell me something, but then what? Thank you in advance for your responses!