Hi all. I have only posted once or twice on this site, but I'd love some insight from those who'd like to offer it. I've dealt with various forms of TMS for over a decade: it started with terrible pelvic pain but I've also had stomach ulcers, back pain, nerve burning in my feet and hip pain at points in time.
In working with a TMS therapist I was able to trace the rise of my symptoms to suppressed dissatisfaction with my marriage. For years I put on a happy face and pretended I had a perfect marriage, even though the physical aspect of our marriage was completely broken.
Through working with my therapist, I slowly beat a number of the issues I was having. Starting in September, I completely lost the fear I'd harbored for almost 15 years about pelvic pain, and it disappeared. Then I started running hard again, and the fear of my hip pain disappeared as well. I felt free for the first time since 2006.
Then, my wife and I started seeing a marriage counselor. And even though nothing changed in our relationship, I could see my wife felt "happier" about us, and I didn't want to hurt her by sharing that I felt no different. So I put on a happy face and pretended things were better. In other words, I went right back to pretending everything was OK when it's not. And right away: stomach pain. CONSTANT stomach pain. burning in my throat. Constant hiccupping and cramping. No relief for several weeks. We tried treating it as a recurrence of my ulcer, but so far three weeks of the meds have done nothing. Of course, my doctor wants me to get a CT scan and another endoscopy, but I can't justify putting myself through all of that knowing what I know about how my brain works. I am suppressing fear and anger and sadness, and since I don't fear pelvic pain or hip pain anymore, I imagine my brain sent pain to another place to distract me.
Thoughts?
In working with a TMS therapist I was able to trace the rise of my symptoms to suppressed dissatisfaction with my marriage. For years I put on a happy face and pretended I had a perfect marriage, even though the physical aspect of our marriage was completely broken.
Through working with my therapist, I slowly beat a number of the issues I was having. Starting in September, I completely lost the fear I'd harbored for almost 15 years about pelvic pain, and it disappeared. Then I started running hard again, and the fear of my hip pain disappeared as well. I felt free for the first time since 2006.
Then, my wife and I started seeing a marriage counselor. And even though nothing changed in our relationship, I could see my wife felt "happier" about us, and I didn't want to hurt her by sharing that I felt no different. So I put on a happy face and pretended things were better. In other words, I went right back to pretending everything was OK when it's not. And right away: stomach pain. CONSTANT stomach pain. burning in my throat. Constant hiccupping and cramping. No relief for several weeks. We tried treating it as a recurrence of my ulcer, but so far three weeks of the meds have done nothing. Of course, my doctor wants me to get a CT scan and another endoscopy, but I can't justify putting myself through all of that knowing what I know about how my brain works. I am suppressing fear and anger and sadness, and since I don't fear pelvic pain or hip pain anymore, I imagine my brain sent pain to another place to distract me.
Thoughts?
