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Constant stomach pain/acid reflux: Symptom Imperative

Discussion in 'General Discussion Subforum' started by maxpower, Nov 17, 2020.

  1. maxpower

    maxpower New Member

    Hi all. I have only posted once or twice on this site, but I'd love some insight from those who'd like to offer it. I've dealt with various forms of TMS for over a decade: it started with terrible pelvic pain but I've also had stomach ulcers, back pain, nerve burning in my feet and hip pain at points in time.

    In working with a TMS therapist I was able to trace the rise of my symptoms to suppressed dissatisfaction with my marriage. For years I put on a happy face and pretended I had a perfect marriage, even though the physical aspect of our marriage was completely broken.

    Through working with my therapist, I slowly beat a number of the issues I was having. Starting in September, I completely lost the fear I'd harbored for almost 15 years about pelvic pain, and it disappeared. Then I started running hard again, and the fear of my hip pain disappeared as well. I felt free for the first time since 2006.

    Then, my wife and I started seeing a marriage counselor. And even though nothing changed in our relationship, I could see my wife felt "happier" about us, and I didn't want to hurt her by sharing that I felt no different. So I put on a happy face and pretended things were better. In other words, I went right back to pretending everything was OK when it's not. And right away: stomach pain. CONSTANT stomach pain. burning in my throat. Constant hiccupping and cramping. No relief for several weeks. We tried treating it as a recurrence of my ulcer, but so far three weeks of the meds have done nothing. Of course, my doctor wants me to get a CT scan and another endoscopy, but I can't justify putting myself through all of that knowing what I know about how my brain works. I am suppressing fear and anger and sadness, and since I don't fear pelvic pain or hip pain anymore, I imagine my brain sent pain to another place to distract me.

    Thoughts?
     
  2. hecate105

    hecate105 Well known member

    You need to be kind and thoughtful to yourself as well as your wife. You are both part of the marriage - so be honest with each other and continue from there - you cannot make yourself more ill just to avoid the brutal honesty that is needed in a marriage... You can see that yourself.... Also your wife could be doing exactly the same.... putting on a brave face for you - It is really difficult to have a successful partnership - but it only comes with being open with each other and having enough respect for each other that you will work thru all the problems - then whether you stay together or not - you will both be able to say you treated each other with human respect and kindness .... I hope you both work it out so you will both be happy...
     

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