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confession

Discussion in 'Support Subforum' started by ashoo79, Mar 23, 2016.

  1. ashoo79

    ashoo79 New Member

    I have been taking painkillers throughout for my sciatica symptoms with three kids to take care of I feel like I can't even move around the house without takings meds for my relief. This is very very tough on me I spend all day in this hope that I might not have tobtake it today but every evening I wind up taking it. I don't know I am fueling my symptoms or what but it's been almost three months in this and I am sick of it... I believe it I do believe it I am trying my best to look into my traits. journaling everyday.. But why my hopes shattered every other day. What am I missing. I have the best support group I can ask for. I am trying to stay focused too. Then what? How to just turn the switch ON for my brain. My leg burns my butt feel.like someone stabbed me while my medicine wear off..
     
  2. TG957

    TG957 Beloved Grand Eagle

    Your hopes get shattered every day because you set a deadline, consciously or subconsciously. Your deadline drives anxiety, anxiety fuels pain. Stop counting days, no matter how hard it is. Set smaller goals: 2 hours without meds, 3 hours etc. It will happen, sooner than later. Good luck!
     
  3. Susan1111

    Susan1111 Well known member

    Ashoo79 pain is awful.... There is nothing wrong in wanting to relieve it. I remember when I had sciatica pain I went to see a Broadway show and I couldn't wait untll intermission so I could sit on the floor of the aisle to stretch... Daily I stretched I rolled I used massage balls and acupuncture...I didn't know about TMS....I kept moving, and exercising... One day it was just gone...I never feared the pain it just hurt...my best advise keep moving!!!!
    Take pain medication it's OK don't feel guilty!

    Warmly, Susan
     
  4. ashoo79

    ashoo79 New Member

    Susan right now I am crying out loud I don't know how long I have to bear this..its been three months I have 4 month old baby who needs me I have 8 yr old and also 5 yr old. I feel like I am a dead man walking.
    Tg957 you are right I am about to be done with SEP program in one week or so and still taking meds I thought I be done with pain by the end or atleast some relief without meds but here I am fueling it again monitoring it cuz my brain just killing me to think about it. No matter how hard I am trying stupid brain is there to pump up my stresses
     
  5. TG957

    TG957 Beloved Grand Eagle

    ashoo79, can you find just 5 minutes a day for yourself, to close your eyes and meditate? make it 5 minutes of a quiet dream that pain will go away. make a note of your anxiety to yourself each time you are in pain. it will happen. it is all in your hands. your brain is not stupid, it is just very tired. talk to it in a friendly voice.
     
  6. Simplicity

    Simplicity Guest

    Hi @ashoo79, I'm so sorry to hear that you're in so much pain. I can totally understand that you're desperate to heal. Sciatica was one of my TMS-symptoms as well, I couldn't walk, sit or turn around in bed without excruciating pain and I don't suffer from it anymore - it's possible to get rid of it. No matter how much we want to be completely healed NOW, it's important not to put that pressure on ourselves because that only fuels the symptoms even more.

    You have to be kind toward yourself, right now it sounds like you're beating yourself up all day long because of the pain and for taking painkillers and that is the first thing you have to stop doing - It's OK to need some relief from the pain, to be able to care for your family - YOU ARE OK even if you're in pain, you're doing the best you can and that's enough.

    I know it's extremely difficult, but we have to stop seeing TMS as our enemy, make peace with it and accept it. It's here to teach us something - that we are too stressed out, that we need to take better care of ourselves, that we have to be kind toward ourselves, etc and that is something that takes time.

    Here's a guide @Forest wrote that I really like: Living Tension Free. ... and I would definitely look into working with the Inner Bully/Critic - disengaging from the negative self-talk is so important.

    All the best.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 24, 2016
    Susan1111 likes this.
  7. Susan1111

    Susan1111 Well known member

    Here's a guide @Forest wrote that I really like: Living Tension Free. ... and I would definitely look into working with theInner Bully/Critic - disengaging from the negative self-talk is so important.

    What a wonderful article. Thank you so much for posting!
     
    Simplicity likes this.
  8. ashoo79

    ashoo79 New Member

    Thank you simplicity for posting it. I am almost done with structured program and will start Alan program after that.
     
  9. ashoo79

    ashoo79 New Member

    thank you so much for helping me
     
    Susan1111 likes this.
  10. ashoo79

    ashoo79 New Member

    Simplicity it seems like its taking for me forever. I know I should not be counting at all but its been three months I am trying the best I can. Have you also experienced the burn in lower leg as soon you started walking. And I wonder sometimes how to just calm down and I try to stay calm but with this burning symptom I have to sit down somewhere.
     
  11. Simplicity

    Simplicity Guest

    My hip/leg would hurt (+ my foot) which forced me to walk with a cane. Once I accepted that this was TMS I started moving around more, taking very short walks and teaching myself that it was OK to walk even with the pain, increasing the physical activity gradually. I started my TMS journey in September last year and the pain improved somewhat, then it got a lot worse during a very stressful time later in the fall... but sometime after that it just went away.

    As far as burning/tingling/numbness in limbs I think it's important to get checked out properly by a doctor to be sure that there's nothing else going on. If you've done that, the only thing you can do is to keep working at it, take your time, don't be hard on yourself and you will get better!
     
  12. ashoo79

    ashoo79 New Member

    Yes my spine surgeon checked it with X-ray and MRI and as usual what they always say in my case is herniated disc with nerve pinching. I read healing back pain by Sarno and read it almost 2 times. My regular doctor when I asked if there is anything structural? Her answer was NO. Its nerve pinching basically. And I am taking pain killer too just because I have 8 yr 5 yr and 4 month old baby to take care of. I know it should not be an excuse but I am doing the best I can as of right now with this cripple pain. Thank you so much for replying back to me.
     
    Simplicity likes this.
  13. Simplicity

    Simplicity Guest

    That's great that you have that confirmation, then you can feel confident to continue to work on your TMS. I can't even imagine having three young children to take care of and being in such pain, you should give yourself credit for all the things you do despite of the pain. You're not alone, there're plenty of people here to support you.
     
  14. Orion2012

    Orion2012 Well known member

    I believe Sarno is correct that pinched nerves do not cause pain or burning. A pinched nerve can only cause numbness. I recovered from a herniated disc with horrific sciatica using mindbody techniques, and it did take months. Longer than I wanted. I had to stop putting pressure on myself to heal on a deadline before I saw results.
    I think it is Ok to use pain meds if they help you feel better, but if you feel guilty about using them, they are not helping your TMS.
     

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