Marissa2010
New Member
Within the last couple of days I have suffered a complete relapse and am freaking out! I'm trying not to give it too much attention, and am really trying to stay calm and do everything I did the first time to recover completely. I have a lot of obvious causes for it...it coincides exactly with the death of my mother. But it's still getting worse by the minute. So far nights are the worst and my lower back/Sciatica woke me up at 2am with excruciating pain. I was able to talk it down a bit and focus on my emotions to fall asleep again. I guess I just need some reassurance. I can't believe after making a full recovery that I'm back here again. I have an appt in 2 weeks with a TMS Psychotherapist I found on this forum, but I'm just really scared for the next 2 weeks until I see her. It's such a weird thing this time because the symptoms that I experienced in different intervals over several months before healing are coming at me in full force rapidly withing 1 week. It's almost as if my unconscious mind is throwing everything it possibly can at me as fast as it can, like a last ditch effort. I'm journaling and i'm also starting the recovery program again, but I feel myself slipping at moments when the pain is so bad. I'm not taking any meds or anything because I already know from experience it doesn't work. Just needed someone who understands to vent to!