But...nothing is working and my pain is getting worse!

[Cactusflower]

I like to watch free youtube TMS videos once or twice a week.
Most of the time, the advice given is really helpful. I like hearing the information from a variety of people and from a variety of perspectives.

Occassionally I watch Myriam with PainOutsideTheBox she's very straight forward, and kind but drives a hard line.

Here she discusses exactly what to ask yourself with all honesty, and how to conduct yourself: things you actually "DO" long term (she is a proponent of continuing your mind-body practices through your life) when you feel you've tried everything, and think perhaps you've come to a dead end with mind-body (TMS) practices.

 

[Diana-M]

Wow! Thanks, @Cactusflower! I really like Miriam. First time I’ve heard her. And this video in particular speaks to me!

She says: “If nothing is working, ask yourself this: (3:07) What are your symptoms trying to tell you? Are your symptoms trying stop you from doing something specific? Are they trying to get you out of a toxic situation? Are they trying to get you to take a time out? To give yourself what you really need? Are they trying to get you to pursue your dream? There’s no reason pursuing all this healing if you’re not really listening. Do you need to release a relationship? Get aware of what you need. Lifestyle tweaks are needed. In the mind-body world, we need to live the right life for us, then the healing takes place as a direct result. Are you basing your life on what aligns with your own personal definition of happiness, or on what you think you *should* be doing?”

I like this because I have been wrestling so hard with all the changes my symptoms have “caused” in my life, mainly, getting me out of almost everything I was doing before. From working doing some things I didn’t like, to doing all the cooking, to service projects and babysitting grandkids and spending time talking to toxic family and friends.

At first I was resisting. I felt so lost without all these obligations! I wanted to get better so I could get back to all my obligations and make everybody happy. Then, as I journaled more and more, I could see that I didn’t really want to do any of it. I just felt I had to. I’ve been holding myself up to these brutal standards of performance and social obligation all my life. I couldn’t feel what I really thought about anything. What I really want.

since I’ve started work on the forum about 4 months ago, things have changed. I’ve loosened up. I’ve declined all these pressures. (My body made Me!) I can regroup now. I am starting to accept that I don’t want my old life back. And that’s scary. I’m so used to all these props holding up my self esteem. Now I’m in the deep water, swimming with myself. I have to make sense out of who I really am and be able to defend it. Am I ready for that yet? I guess my body knows.

A lightbulb is going off: I Don’t even have to wait til TMS goes away to live My new better life right now! This is such a mind-blowing thought. It really took me awhile to see all of this. And I’m sure there is much more left to see!

 

[BloodMoon]

I've just watch the video you posted plus some more of Miriam's videos - and they are really, really good! Thanks for posting this, @Cactusflower.

 

[Tomi]

Having come back here after a long break, I came across the video you posted @Cactusflower. It's wonderful and just what I needed to hear! Thank you for sharing. I have now subscribed to Miriam's channel and will watch more of them.