Mani
Well known member
So, these last days had been going amazing. I was doing great (mind you this is coinciding with upping dosage) but i was more comfortable and i could let sound go and i was so proud of myself. I was already thinking about my barbers appointment (which will probably not be anytime soon) but i was just in a really good mood and i could eat with my parents again (with ear pro), utensils bothered me less, it was all great.
So yesterday evening i suddenly started feeling a lot worse. Pressure in my belly, i felt like i was gonna vomit. I got sweaty and i was just very uncomfortable. I had noticed i was way more sensitive to sound right after dinner and that went on until todays morning and i had an appointment to make an ecg. I wasnt catastrophizing at all but i was aware that i wasnt feeling as great as i had been. I knew that this was the time to prove to myself that id learnt stuff to deal with this a little better
Spoiler: i did not deal with this better. I was just as stressed, sounds were just as stressful and loud. I tried putting my mind off and feeling my body but they just kept coming. Afterwards I cant help but feel a little helpless again. Where is my impact? Where is my influence? I have picked this all up again just to get hit with a setback like that out of nowhere. It wasnt the setback that got to me but the fact that i wasnt able to deal with it better. I felt so helpless again. Want to say I am doing better already and im still not at all catastrophizing.
What are my takeaways supposed to be? Did my symptoms get worse because i had this ecg planned? How can i take matters into my own hands and stop feeling so helpless? I thought that i was doing better because i was doing it better, now i realized that theres still so much not in my control.
I thought id post here to maybe get some support, get some insights get some help. I'm so dedicated to making this work and I just dont wanna give up and thats why im here. What can i improve? How to deal with all this? How can i still keep going without just flat out ignoring my body and making it all worse?
So yesterday evening i suddenly started feeling a lot worse. Pressure in my belly, i felt like i was gonna vomit. I got sweaty and i was just very uncomfortable. I had noticed i was way more sensitive to sound right after dinner and that went on until todays morning and i had an appointment to make an ecg. I wasnt catastrophizing at all but i was aware that i wasnt feeling as great as i had been. I knew that this was the time to prove to myself that id learnt stuff to deal with this a little better
Spoiler: i did not deal with this better. I was just as stressed, sounds were just as stressful and loud. I tried putting my mind off and feeling my body but they just kept coming. Afterwards I cant help but feel a little helpless again. Where is my impact? Where is my influence? I have picked this all up again just to get hit with a setback like that out of nowhere. It wasnt the setback that got to me but the fact that i wasnt able to deal with it better. I felt so helpless again. Want to say I am doing better already and im still not at all catastrophizing.
What are my takeaways supposed to be? Did my symptoms get worse because i had this ecg planned? How can i take matters into my own hands and stop feeling so helpless? I thought that i was doing better because i was doing it better, now i realized that theres still so much not in my control.
I thought id post here to maybe get some support, get some insights get some help. I'm so dedicated to making this work and I just dont wanna give up and thats why im here. What can i improve? How to deal with all this? How can i still keep going without just flat out ignoring my body and making it all worse?
