Rosebud
Peer Supporter
Today, I had to spider write about something that is causing me anxiety, and one of the things that is causing me stress and anxiety is my home. I'm a SAHM, and I spend a lot of time at home. Unfortunately, I'm not a very good housewife: I dislike housework and I'm not good at it. My husband works long hours, and literally everything falls on me, cleaning, decluttering, home repair, gardening, bill-paying, everything car-related, you name it. If I don't do it, it doesn't happen.
So, I'm writing down everything that stresses me, and I end up with what is basically an enormous to do list. Eek, that wasn't supposed to happen!
I did realise though, that I'm pretty angry about this. There are reasons why I ended up in this situation, and I had my part in that story, but still. I also realised that I am a caretaker after all. I'm not that person who volunteers to do your dishes or to pick you up at the airport at 3 am, but at home, I do tend to end up with the stuff nobody else wants to do. Hm. Why do I have to do all of that? Why indeed.
So, I'm writing down everything that stresses me, and I end up with what is basically an enormous to do list. Eek, that wasn't supposed to happen!
I did realise though, that I'm pretty angry about this. There are reasons why I ended up in this situation, and I had my part in that story, but still. I also realised that I am a caretaker after all. I'm not that person who volunteers to do your dishes or to pick you up at the airport at 3 am, but at home, I do tend to end up with the stuff nobody else wants to do. Hm. Why do I have to do all of that? Why indeed.