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A Lifetime of Symptoms - back, migraine, afib

B

bc1016

New Member
I write you all today for positive feedback, hope, and motivation. I refuse to give up.

29M. Healthy. Fit. Hard working. Perfectionist. Puts pressure on self to do good. Fear of failure and embarrassment. Sensitive to criticism and rejection.

Throughout my life I have battled TMS. During my early 20s I had debilitating back pain, migraine, and some sciatic pain. After discovering Sarno I realized the stressors in my life. School, serious program, girlfriend, etc. I bought in. I got back in shape. Symptoms vanished. It was fascinating.

After being healed, I did the work less..... pressures at work picked up. Responsibilities picked up. Failed relationships. Pressures in routine, always in a rush. And so did debilitating migraine/tension headaches. So painful surely this was different. They still come and go till today. I fear throwing up from the pain in some situations. But have gotten more comfortable with the pain and am okay sitting through them. After realizing how I am always in a rush I picked up meditation. It did help clear my mind some.

One year ago I had a bout of AFIB. It was scary and new and unexplainable. Im healthy and my heart is structurally normal. My risk of stroke is nill. Yet because it was new I eventually had an ablation done. It went away, tension headaches became daily but never debilitating.

Still really didn't sit down and do the work. But was doing well moving slower, meditating, and being mindful. At the same time stress at work picks up, unsure if i should take a new job. Stress with relationships and girls picked up. Unsure if im with the right person. And as this cocktail came to be, today marks my first afib episode in 1.5 years. Funny isn't it.

So as I write this in AFIB. I don't care. I don't care this is flopping around in my chest. I'm 29 and single, no one is depending on me. My heart is structurally normal. I put a fuck ton of pressure on myself and have rage at others. So im going to let it continue until my brain gives up. Im a tough mother fucker. Im not going to die. And if my brain thinks im bluffing, Im 29 single no kids.

Yes im being morbid, but i mean business. Partially writing this for my own realization.

In case it helps others, here are all symptoms ive noticed over the years:
- back pain
- migraine
- tension headaches
- afib / palipations
- heartburn
- tingling sensation / numbness in limbs. feels warm
- achilles pain
- leg knee pain
- always hungry, almost like a low blood sugar feeling like need to eat
- anxious
- depressed
- throbbing in ear, hear heartbeat
- vision bluriness
 
Hello after three years, @bc1016.

This is a very interesting post on several levels. One is that I've had palpitations off and on all of my adult life, but the only time I finally took myself in to urgent care during an extended episode was last summer - and sure enough, I was in Afib. And I converted within a few hours and they sent me home - with a blood thinner and a beta blocker of course, gah. I haven't mentioned yet that I'm 75 years old, so it's harder to talk my way out of being medicated, but I immediately determined that I was going to get off the blood thinner. Like you, I also do not take my proclivity for Afib at all seriously, even at my age.

I agreed to upgrade my watch to one with an ECG function. I've only ever recorded normal sinus rhythm even at times I'm feeling jittery or having palpitations. The watch had no problem capturing an Afib reading on a friend who's always in it. After six months I asked to wear a Holter monitor, which recorded zero incidents other than typical minor palpitations. I declared my intention to go off the blood thinner, agreeing to all of the cautionary caveats. And I don't worry about it.

bc1016 said:
So as I write this in AFIB. I don't care.
Click to expand...
And I totally get it, right? But I'm also not in Afib. Even at 75, when believe me, body parts really don't work as well as they used to. But you're far too young to be putting up with so many significant symptoms, my friend. I haven't had a sick headache (maybe they were migraines) since 2011, which is when I discovered Dr Sarno and this site.

bc1016 said:
Still really didn't sit down and do the work.
Click to expand...
And there's the thing. You've clearly got the TMS knowledge in hand, but you're all over the place with it, with no real structure or discipline, and no long-term consistent application of the principles to help maintain your equanimity in the long term and in the face of life's stressors.

Your acceptance of your symptoms is admirable, as well as being an essential first step. It's time to take the next step, and do the SEP - the Structured Educational Program on the main TMSWiki.org. On the so-called "Week 0" page, I've linked to a forum post I wrote on the SEP's subforum, about tips for success. The program is completely free of cost, ads, or any kind of registration. You just need to make an honest commitment to yourself and do it.
 
JanAtheCPA said:
Hello after three years, @bc1016.

This is a very interesting post on several levels. One is that I've had palpitations off and on all of my adult life, but the only time I finally took myself in to urgent care during an extended episode was last summer - and sure enough, I was in Afib. And I converted within a few hours and they sent me home - with a blood thinner and a beta blocker of course, gah. I haven't mentioned yet that I'm 75 years old, so it's harder to talk my way out of being medicated, but I immediately determined that I was going to get off the blood thinner. Like you, I also do not take my proclivity for Afib at all seriously, even at my age.

I agreed to upgrade my watch to one with an ECG function. I've only ever recorded normal sinus rhythm even at times I'm feeling jittery or having palpitations. The watch had no problem capturing an Afib reading on a friend who's always in it. After six months I asked to wear a Holter monitor, which recorded zero incidents other than typical minor palpitations. I declared my intention to go off the blood thinner, agreeing to all of the cautionary caveats. And I don't worry about it.


And I totally get it, right? But I'm also not in Afib. Even at 75, when believe me, body parts really don't work as well as they used to. But you're far too young to be putting up with so many significant symptoms, my friend. I haven't had a sick headache (maybe they were migraines) since 2011, which is when I discovered Dr Sarno and this site.


And there's the thing. You've clearly got the TMS knowledge in hand, but you're all over the place with it, with no real structure or discipline, and no long-term consistent application of the principles to help maintain your equanimity in the long term and in the face of life's stressors.

Your acceptance of your symptoms is admirable, as well as being an essential first step. It's time to take the next step, and do the SEP - the Structured Educational Program on the main TMSWiki.org. On the so-called "Week 0" page, I've linked to a forum post I wrote on the SEP's subforum, about tips for success. The program is completely free of cost, ads, or any kind of registration. You just need to make an honest commitment to yourself and do it.
Click to expand...
Interesting. So you believe your afib/palpitations are TMS. my trigger for AFIB was any time i swallowed anything freezing cold, it would shock the vagus nerve, ultimately throwing off my heartrate. weird, but it happened multiple times and at the time was difficult to buy in as TMS. Got Ablation. Fine for 1.5 years until yesterday when it happened after swallowing cold kefir. But maybe my vagus nerve is the issue, since it controls so much in the body, My nervous system creates a faulty vagus nerve?
 
Who knows? Everything is so interconnected, there's no way to really know for sure. There is one thing we do know for sure, which is that every single physiological system, process, and sensation that keeps us alive and experiencing, is created or controlled by our brains. This is a neuroscientific fact - and it totally explains why and how our brains can create real physiological responses for psychological purposes: all the way from blushing, to the big distraction symptoms we call TMS.
 
Dear new member, my heart goes out to you. You could be me many years ago, or any one of my family. The tools I have learned include knowing that the sensations including afib all come from your brain. Yes, they are real, but they come from your brain and can be healed from your brain. Concentrate on who you would be without the sensations, and then become that person. You are smart and healthy and can do this. This is a new life style, not a medical cure. I work at it every day and my life is better than I could ever have dreamed. Trust the process, it works.
 
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