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Hi Mark,

Healing is a 2 pronged approach. There's the emotions you are repressing (from the past but also going on in the day to day, every day) and there are the practical changes you need to make, both practical and mental. You have to remember that all your TMS symptoms, as well as other behaviors (drinking, gambling, whatever...) are ALL distractions from emotion. The more you repress and the more threatening and scary those emotions are, the more your brain will try to come up with ways to distract you. The goal is to communicate to your brain that you can handle those emotions and that it doesn't need to keep distracting you (sending you pain signals). This takes a lot of patience and persistence from a mechanical/mental standpoint. There is no magic recipe but simply being persistent and calm and confident in the TMS diagnosis.

Step 1: Become aware of the chronic negative thoughts you are having on a day to day basis and become aware of the tension this is generating for you. Some of these negative thought patterns are rooted in the past and carry over to your present day but most is being generated by things going on in your life. I can't stress this enough: The goal is not to be out of pain. The goal is to live your authentic self and to live your life. Its not about your body or your symptoms or even other behaviors....it is about your LIFE. You must consistently shift your focus from the physical to the psychological. This takes practice and time but the more you focus on the real things in your life and the more you get out of the state of emotional repression...the more the pain starts to fade out. Why?? Because it no longer serves a purpose! You disable the pain strategy. There is no rush or pressure. Just live your life and trust the process. There is nothing wrong with you. You are already "well" but you just don't realize it yet because you keep getting in own way.

Another thing you need to figure out is how to lower your anxiety level (whether it's through meditation, anti depressants, journaling...whatever...). You won't be able to do the work if you are in a constant state of fight or flight and numbing yourself in other ways. The next thing you will have to do (I know I did) is make changes in your life that are aligned with your true desires. Figure out what you want to do instead of what you think you "should" do or what others expect of you. Really focus on that. This is not a physical journey. It's an emotional one. You will never never ever find the answers outside yourself (from doctors, other people, relationships, places...). You will own find them within. You created this pain and you can just as easily increate it. That is the truth and I know of what I speak lol!

I hope that gives you some pointers in the right direction! It sounds like on some level you already know all this deep down but may not have been ready to face it

Miffy Bunny