I’m not sure what to do. I’m in the middle of one of the worst IBS/acute rectal and colon spasm flares I’ve had for a long while and I’m feeling close to breaking point with the pelvic pain and stress. It’s been building up for a few days. Last night I couldn’t find a comfortable position in bed, so I got up and fell asleep in the chair for about 4 hours then went back to bed. The burning pain was so bad when I lay down that I abandoned the effort to get any more sleep. All this interspersed with several trips to the bathroom. Whatever else has been going on re pain I do generally manage to get a reasonable night’s sleep so I find this frightening. Recently, as per the received TMS wisdom, I’ve been making a real effort to get out there and start living my life, and yesterday was no exception – I met up socially with my local French language group yesterday morning even though the pain was bad. They're a nice bunch and yes, I enjoyed it, chatted a lot, and I had moments when I managed to block out the pain but the added tension was there and it just built up over the rest of the day. I’m due to see my GP tomorrow, ostensibly as a follow-up to the foot surgery I had in June. Previously I’ve had a load of tests and been told that there’s not a lot the medical profession can do, its IBS, and it’s a question of learning to live with it. I’ve been given some medication which, to be honest, doesn’t really help. I’m now debating whether to approach this subject with her again. I do believe this condition has been triggered by repressed emotion, anxiety, rage, fear, which has built up for decades (I’m 69). I’ve done a lot of work on myself over the years and I’m pretty sure I know what’s going on. But the knowledge, both of my own history and of the TMS approach, through the books and through this Forum doesn’t stop flares like this one. And they frighten me a lot. One thing I’ve realised recently is that pelvic pain run in the maternal line of my family. My mother died of multiple myeloma which gradually destroyed the bones in her pelvis and meant she was in increasing pain and couldn’t sit down properly for her last years. Her mother died of uterine cancer. So there does seem to be a pelvic/sacral link. And I need to break this particular family chain, I really do. I’m wondering if this flare is due to the fact that I am indeed building up a social life again. As well as being enjoyable, this has also brought up a lot of the fear and discomfort I’ve had in relationships and friendships. Fear of not being accepted, of inadequacy, of not fitting in, etc etc. Maybe the body is trying to protect me from all this? Or is it sabotaging me? I don’t know. Forgive the length of this post. I just needed to get it off my chest. Any suggestions etc, particularly from anyone who has been through similar stuff, would be really good. But thanks anyway for reading and for being there.