Do You Have a Habit of Intensity?

Do you have a habit of intensity?


I mean this in all seriousness. Do you approach your whole life with intense pressure? Intense expectations, intense responses to others, intense scrutiny of every thought and emotion that you have?


Especially after learning about the mind/body connection, we can become even MORE intense in our quest to solve our dilemma, find the repressed emotion, or unlock some hidden trauma. We quite literally start to chase this new TMS concept with all the intensity that we chased the medical treatments. This does not serve us. It just acts to fire up the nervous system further.


I believe that words matter. Especially the ones we mutter to ourselves. So, in that spirit, let’s talk about helpful words and concepts and take the intensity and fear down a notch or two in the process.


I really like the word “allow.” I like how it just sits there with open arms and lets what will be, will be. We allow emotions to rise in us. We don’t scratch and search and pursue. We open to them and allow them. Sometimes it takes a bit for our emotional selves to come forward. That’s okay. Allow the time it takes. Sometimes our emotions are just a jumbled mess. Great. There they are. A giant wad of emotions, being allowed to be.


Another well favored word is “understanding,” because it is only through understanding that we can feel authentic, true, deep, compassion for ourselves and empathy toward others. When I understand myself, why some events or situations are difficult for me, I can see the emotions without judgment or shame or self condemnation. When I have understanding, I am able to relate to all humans with more insight and sensitivity. And that includes relating to myself.


The last word I’ll introduce here is “gentle.” Please, please, please be gentle with your soul. Treat yourself with kindness and leniency. Sometimes when we finally grasp the concept that our TMS pain and symptoms are because of our own brains, our own triggers, and our own personality traits, we can become even more harsh and impatient with our recovery. Slow down. Slow way way down. Go gently, softly, with loving intention. No intensity in sight.
www.pathsbeyondpain.com

 

Intensity is an interesting one because it's different for everyone.

I still have no idea how my nervous system best works.
My brain really likes complexity and variety and has a hard time doing one thing at a time. Time flies faster than I can perceive it. I feel so behind at times amidst all this change. I also pressure myself a lot when I see how burnout limits me. I wish I could get past my current limits but self care is still a struggle. I'm interested in technology ethics, futurism, cognitive science, and neuroscience at the moment, but my time and energy is mostly spent working on engineering homework and figuring out how to get to FI and time freedom. The things I want require more energy and executive functioning than I currently have. I want to fulfill my potential but I'll have to put that on hold to recover from burnout. I want my gifts, personality, and life first because life hacks aren't cutting it anymore and blaming myself or "the system" makes me uncomfortably bored and frustrated. Any way to make this less complicated and more enjoyable seems to be helping.