Day 11

I just read the armchair linguist story. I found it interesting how she began to observe a pattern to her symptoms. I haven’t quite figured out my present ones, but having learned about TMS now, I see patterns of it showing up before. They were not enough to stop me in my tracks like now, but I definitely see them as TMS now.

When I have a lot of work to do, and I either have a time crunch, or I’ve given myself a time crunch, and I want to crank through it, I have had back pain. I used to always attribute it to hunching over at my desk. I would try walking around while grading papers, but so many things require the computer that I have to sit. But I found that even when I wasn’t sitting, I would have that pain and then it would alleviate after I got through the pile as it were.

When I’ve been in extreme focus, hard work mode, I have seen tension all through my body, but particularly my arms. For many years, I just pushed through it, because I always knew relief was getting the work out of the way.

This year new symptoms have come and made me stop in my tracks. Maybe after all these years, my body and my brain decided the old tricks were not enough. That’s when I eventually found TMS.

in the article, she also took time to give thanks for her Small successes, recognizing that they were not small at all. I’m trying to do that too. It’s a fine dance between focusing too much on TMS and yet being aware of your own progress. I’m trying to figure that out.

 

Focusing too much on TMS almost always entails fear and anxiety thoughts, that's what gets you and what keeps you obsessed. I wouldn't worry about being aware of your own progress when it comes to this, that is actually the opposite and can combat that fear and anxiety