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Thread:
Benign Fasciculation Syndrome and TMS
Words have great power. How we phrase things, how we express our intentions, this all carries the potential to heal or stagnate or harm. When someone tells me to relax, my body will tense against it in response. When someone asks me to 'soften' .... that evokes a gentle warmth. What some do not realize is that muscles do not stretch. Muscles contract and muscles release. Fascia stretches, but not muscle. That is what is occurring during a muscle spasm or 'lock down' (as I call it). And nerves can be whimpering distantly, or screaming in agony .... this is a reflection of those dark places within us. Everything we have experienced, and how we've responded to it ... these experiences are mirrored within the marrow of our being. In my hands, there are times when my nerves abruptly and completely fail to activate, causing me to drop what I am holding.

That latter experience came with additional clutter. A several months ago, I became concerned about a 'rash' on my lower palm. Red, abraded, with tiny dots. After watching it for about a month or so, I decided to seek medical attention. It did not hurt, but it was getting worse. The medical office set out an appointment for over a month out. Which was a blessing. One evening, as I was grating my cheese (for popcorn), I felt a little sting. Looking at my hand, I noticed the position. It is a sturdy, triangular grater, and I was holding it directly over the spice edge, where it is sharp and pokey. I could not feel it, but it was abrading my skin and causing tiny blood flecks. Because I had shifted my grip, another part of my hand felt the sting.

My inattentiveness was causing my very real injury. The numbness is almost constant, and travels in my arm with tingles, but I have (mostly) ceased to worry about it. So much so, I just forgot about it.

Attentiveness is vital. While being aware that so many of our symptoms are emotional, it is important to work with them and not cause actual damage to ourselves.

I do not think in terms of 'breaking' the fear/worry/anxiety. I think in terms of easing, softening, soothing those emotions. Nurturing rather than dominating. Loving rather than oppressing.

It is so much easier to be kind to others, and so much more challenging to be kind to ourselves.

You ARE worthy, and you ARE strong, and you ARE exquisitely lovable.

Love ~ Compassion ~ Kindness
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