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Hi, everyone!

I put together the following for myself and am starting to implement it as, although vastly improved from being bedridden and functioning pretty well by comparison these days, I felt in need of a plan to incorporate and make a daily habit of giving myself 'messages of safety' to hopefully get me over the finish line.

I thought I'd share my 6 month plan in case it will be of any interest and help to anyone else on the forum.

(I realise that it won't gel with some members of the forum so I post this up purely on a 'take it or leave it' basis rather than for it to be a discussion piece regarding 'messages of safety'.)

6-Month Baby Steps Programme: Safety Messages for Mind/Body Pain and Other Symptoms

Month 1: Foundations of Safety

• Week 1: Grounding Breath

• Practice slow breathing (inhale 4, exhale 6) with the message: “I am safe in this moment.”

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• Week 2: Gentle Self-Talk

• Respond to discomfort with: “It’s okay to feel this. My body is trying to protect me. I am safe.”

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• Week 3: Body Scan Check-In

• Spend 2 minutes daily noticing sensations, repeating: “Whatever I notice is okay. I am safe to feel.”

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• Week 4: Soothing Touch

• Place a hand on your heart or comforting spot. Say: “I am here for you. You are safe.”

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Month 2: Comfort, Gratitude, and Self-Compassion

• Week 5: Thumb-Forefinger Comfort Gesture

• Gently rub thumb and forefinger together for comfort, focusing on the sensation and repeating: “This touch is safe and soothing.”

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• Week 6: Start a Gratitude Jar

• Each day, write one thing you’re grateful for and place it in your jar.

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• Week 7: Safe Place Visualization

• Imagine a place where you feel completely safe and visit it in your mind daily.

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• Week 8: Breath Pleasure (a la Shinzen Young)

• Focus on the pleasant sensations of breathing, using it as a gentle anchor for comfort and safety. Focus on the subtle pleasure of the breath entering and leaving your body. Notice and appreciate how your chest muscles relax on the out breath and also how pleasant it is to be filling your lungs with oxygen on the in breath.

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Month 3: Deepening Mind-Body Safety

• Week 9: Self-Compassion Pause

• When self-criticism arises, pause and say: “I’m doing the best I can. I deserve kindness.”

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• Week 10: Affirming Journal

• Write a daily affirmation of safety or kindness.

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• Week 11: Supportive Movement

• Add gentle stretching or mindful walking, affirming: “Movement is safe and nurturing for my body.”

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• Week 12: Visualization for losing symptoms

• Visualize your body losing symptoms — imagine light, warmth, or gentle waves soothing areas of discomfort.

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Month 4: Expanding Comfort and Resilience

• Week 13: Peter Levine’s Holding Exercises

• Practice holding exercises such as gently placing one hand on your forehead and the other on your heart, or crossing your arms to hold your shoulders, allowing yourself to feel contained and safe. Stay with the sensations and notice any shifts toward calm or comfort.

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• Week 14: Gratitude Jar Reflection

• Once a week, read a few slips from your gratitude jar to reinforce positive moments.

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• Week 15: Sensory Soothing

• Use a calming scent, sound, or texture daily, saying: “This sensation is safe and calming.”

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• Week 16: Loving-Kindness Meditation

• Spend 5 minutes sending kind wishes to yourself: “May I be safe. May I be at ease.”

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Month 5: Integrating Practices

• Week 17: Bedtime Self-Soothing Ritual

• Each night before sleep, slow your breathing, then gently stroke your arms, legs, chest, face, forehead, and cheeks. As you do, repeat: “Everything is all right; I am safe.” Continue for as long as feels comforting, without timing it.

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• Week 18: Morning Self-Soothing Ritual

• Upon waking, before getting out of bed, repeat the same self-soothing practice as at bedtime, setting a peaceful tone for your day.

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• Week 19: Safety Anchor

• Use your thumb-forefinger gesture or a chosen object as a “safety anchor” whenever you need reassurance.

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• Week 20: Mindful Acknowledgement and Redirection

• When symptoms spike, acknowledge them for a few moments and then gently shift focus to a pleasant activity, reminding yourself: “It’s safe to enjoy this moment.”

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Month 6: Sustaining and Personalizing

• Week 21: Review and Reflect

• Reflect on your journey and the habits that helped most. Add new gratitude notes for milestones reached.

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• Week 22: Teach or Share

• Share a safety message or practice with someone else, reinforcing your own learning.

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• Week 23: Personalized Safety Message

• Create your own unique safety mantra and use it daily.

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• Week 24: Ongoing Practice

• Continue the habits that resonate most.

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Tips:

• Peter Levine’s holding exercises and the self-soothing rituals can be used anytime you need extra comfort, not just at scheduled times.
• Pair physical self-soothing with gentle, reassuring self-talk for maximum effect.
• Think of the bedtime and morning rituals as helping you to bookend your day with safety and tranquillity, supporting nervous system regulation and emotional resilience.
• Place your gratitude jar somewhere visible to encourage daily use.
• Use the thumb-forefinger gesture and breath pleasure anytime you need immediate comfort.
• Pair visualization and affirmations with physical relaxation for deeper effect.
• Celebrate small wins and revisit your gratitude notes during tough times for a boost

Smiling

• Smiling triggers release of endorphins (natural painkillers), serotonin (mood regulator), and dopamine (reward neurotransmitter), which together reduce pain perception and stress.
• It activates the parasympathetic nervous system, promoting relaxation and safety signals to the brain.
• Smiling during pain and discomfort has been linked to lower heart rates and more positive emotional states, supporting resilience.
• Even forced or gentle smiles can improve mood and pain tolerance, making it a practical tool for mind/body pain management.

Where to add smiling in the programme

Throughout the programme, encourage smiling as a gentle, supportive practice:

• Daily Reminder: When practicing self-soothing rituals (bedtime and morning), add a soft smile while stroking your arms, chest, and face, silently repeating, “Everything is all right; I am safe.”
• During Breath Pleasure and Visualization (Week 8 & 12): Include a gentle smile as you focus on breath sensations or healing imagery to deepen relaxation and positive feelings.
• When Using the Thumb-Forefinger Comfort Gesture (Week 5 & Week 19): Smile softly to reinforce comfort and safety.
• During Gentle Movement and Affirmations (Weeks 11 & 10): Smile as you move or write affirmations to boost mood and reduce pain perception.
• Whenever Pain or Discomfort Arises: Practice a spontaneous or gentle smile to help lower heart rate and ease distress.