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WRITING ONESELF OUT OF FIBROMYALGIA

Hi Mermaid and North Star - thank you for your kind words and support.

Mermaid - your story is inspiring and it's good to hear from someone who has managed to kick the drugs and come out the other side. Spring is a time for new beginnings, and I'm hoping to turn the warmer weather to my advantage and start the process of coming off my meds again. I do have a withdrawal when coming off them, which is generally increased pain. I was on a lower dosage for quite a few months last year, and tried to get even lower, but felt it was just a step too far, as the pain became unbearable. I know it's fear that's holding me back; I've been on this drug over 4 years now, and I'm afraid of what it's masking.

North Star - "The Fool" is a character from a series of books by one of my favourite authors, so I really don't mind if you call me by that particular moniker. I have read SteveO's book. He's been a real inspiration for me, and I do believe in Dr Sarno's theory. I think it's more than likely that the mind altering drug I'm taking at the moment is holding me back from a recovery. By the way, your dog looks a little sweetheart. One of the things that has kept me going over the last few years has been my daily walk with my dog, and his companionship of course.

Time to "bite the bullet" again.
 
The Fool said:
Most days, I'm coping, and I'm doing everything physically I need to do. But I never lose hope of getting off this treadmill.
Click to expand...

Hi,
I fully understand what you are saying, it is mostly not as easy as it looks, specially if you read Dr. Sarno's books. There are a lot of cases where people heal really fast, but we also need to remember that he was treating only a small percent of people that were willing to accept tms. I also think that due to these long years of symptoms we adapt our lives to this kind of new living style, even if it works against us, and it becomes extremely difficult to get out of this vicious circle. After following Sarno, Schubiner, Ozanich etc. I came to realize that being alone and experiencing a lot of criticism and indifference throughout my childhood and adult life has made me resistant to change. I am aware that together with the tms healing methods I need to get away from some people and also change a lot of my new and old habits that I developed in order to be able to survive. Hang in there and think how you can slowly make changes, never pressure yourself, do it in your own pace and try to find out what is stopping you, it could be rage, guilt, sadness and also conditioning: here is a link to an introduction to that phenomena:

http://psychology.about.com/od/classicalconditioning/a/pavlovs-dogs.htm

Good luck!

Leonor
 
Foot, good advice from Leonor.

Dr Sarno's books are great on telling the causes of TMS pain but they and others are slim on offering
ways to heal. You can find them by spending some time on TMSWiki.org for posts that tell success stories
in healing.

Also, a new book I wrote with Herbie offers many techniques to heal TMS symptoms:
God Does Not Want You to Be In Pain.
It's available in paperback from amazon.com books and also in a Kindle edition.
 
The Fool said:
Hi Mermaid and North Star - thank you for your kind words and support.

Mermaid - your story is inspiring and it's good to hear from someone who has managed to kick the drugs and come out the other side. Spring is a time for new beginnings, and I'm hoping to turn the warmer weather to my advantage and start the process of coming off my meds again. I do have a withdrawal when coming off them, which is generally increased pain. I was on a lower dosage for quite a few months last year, and tried to get even lower, but felt it was just a step too far, as the pain became unbearable. I know it's fear that's holding me back; I've been on this drug over 4 years now, and I'm afraid of what it's masking.

North Star - "The Fool" is a character from a series of books by one of my favourite authors, so I really don't mind if you call me by that particular moniker. I have read SteveO's book. He's been a real inspiration for me, and I do believe in Dr Sarno's theory. I think it's more than likely that the mind altering drug I'm taking at the moment is holding me back from a recovery. By the way, your dog looks a little sweetheart. One of the things that has kept me going over the last few years has been my daily walk with my dog, and his companionship of course.

Time to "bite the bullet" again.
Click to expand...

You know what, the drug isn't masking a thing. TMS isn't a disease it's emotional, you'll be fine. It was actually making me worse, so don't be afraid be bold and go for it ! It took me three attempts to actually withdraw fully. Spring is a great time to have another try, just remember to go slowly, but stay determined to finish the job. Lots of us have shared this experience, and we're all here to support you.
 
The Fool - Thanks for the clarification on your screen name. Not knowing you I wanted to be very careful because depression/ self deprecation can hitch hike on the back of TMS and I wanted to be careful. :) I'm a big reader myself, btw. (As are many of the regulars here.)

Leonar and Walt have added some great advice too!
 
Thanks everyone for your advice.

Leonor - thanks for the reminder about conditioned responses. I have many, and in true TMS fashion, they all seem to be out to take away the activities that are the most important to me. I hadn't read a book for three years until I made myself read Healing Back Pain, quickly followed by the Great Pain Deception. I still can't sit at my laptop and type for more than 20 minutes without excruciating pain. I gave up drawing, which in fact can be quite soothing, but I could never get myself into a comfortable position. Exercise is way out of my comfort zone, other than walking, and I have tried quite a few activities.

My pain began after a stressful few years with my son, and the death of my mother, so I know it was triggered by anxiety. I have had some sessions with a psychologist who has helped people with ME in the past, and have journalled and explored all aspects of my childhood. I'm just stuck, and the only thing I can think of that is impeding my progress is my meds.

Walt - thanks for your advice, I will certainly explore this website more fully, and look out for yours and Herbie's book.
 
I pity the Fool, but I refuse to get a Mowhawk,

I remember not being able to sit for more than 30 seconds. As you know, sitting at your computer is triggering your pain through conditioned response. Sitting is harmless.

Why is exercise way out of your comfort zone? We need to change that. Remember the good doctor's word "physicophobia?" The fear of physical activity is a more powerful distraction than the pain itself. You must get over your fear of movement. When I consult with people they often say "I believe I have TMS Steve, 100%!" I then say, "really?...then bend over and touch the floor." They normally say "no way!!" So they still fear, and have structural doubts.

I wrote about the stages of TMS, from "hoping you have it, to wanting to believe you have it, to thinking you might, to knowing you have it." When you know you have it you will do all physical movement without fear. So that should be one of your goals, to increase your confidence. It takes great courage to heal, not only to move through the physical stages but also to reflect on your life, and then to make the necessary changes. Change is the most frightening aspect.

2 quick thoughts. Be careful of "exploring all aspects of your childhood." It's not necessary and can lead to psycho-archeology. Dr. Sarno would often get calls from his psychologists telling him, "Dr. Sarno, your patient is wandering." Once they got into therapy they felt it was their duty to begin talking about mommy and daddy, but that's not the goal. The goal is healing. Dr. Sarno once said, "talking about childhood problems is all good and well, but that's not what we're after." Find a TMS psych like Margaret Chan.

Second, drugs are problematic in healing, even though some have healed while on them. But it's a touchy subject for several reasons. The thing that they are hiding from the person may be too powerful to experience, and so they're necessary, so the person thinks. But you are far stronger than you think. Mermaid had a brilliant response for you here. I can't wait to read her book someday, she expresses herself well in writing, and she hits all the main points with clarity.

Drugs can also inhibit the cognitive changes necessary to heal. From what I've seen those on meds are the ones having more troubles in healing. I don't have any scientific data or numbers, but I've been doing this full time for 12 years. At some point you need to make a decision. The emotional pain they're covering is facable, you will survive. But you have to get over the chemical withdrawal. The chemicals, it appears, are often triggering the pain through association. Some have stopped meds and have emailed me to say their pain suddenly quit. But not all of them....

I'm also excited for you because you're going to heal. You've started the process and are taking the correct steps. Good luck.

Steve
 
Last edited:
Steve, I've cut and pasted your post into a page I can refer back to often.
You give a refresher course to use in TMS healing with every post.

When I had back pain I didn't take any aspirin or Advil or anything.
I just set my mind to believing in TMS and in a little while, the pain went away.

As for tranquilizers, I find natural things are much better...
hot tea or milk, deep breathing, positive thinking, meditation, pleasant distractions, etc.

Hope you all have a Happy Easter or Passover.
 
Steve Ozanich said:
How about that guy Wolfe, he damaged more people than anyone I've run across over the past decade. Now he's changed his mind. I literally have hundreds of emails from people who were given the diagnosis of "fibro-disease." They were all in panic, crying, depressed, and debilitated, from the diagnosis itself. They were in pain but functioning until their doctor labeled them with the crippling word called fibromyalgia. I spend tons of hours trying to reverse the damage he did by telling people they're ok. They fall quickly with the words "fibro" but come out very slowly with the words "you're ok." Reversal is more difficult because the survival response is now engaged.

This is what I tried to convey in my chapters 8 and 9. The archetype of healer has a powerful influence on the deeper brain due to the authority the person gives a healer. If we gave no weight to our doctor's words they would never affect us either way. But sometimes they can save us, so we have to be judicious (no relation to delicious).

Now Wolfe says "nevermind"..."my bad." Ya have to say that at least he admits he made a mistake. That's something I suppose.

Steve
Click to expand...
I agree, I don't know of many folks that can say that and not get sued. But he has done it. I told my wife one night that the medical Dr. was the only person I knew of that could make a mistake and you still have to pay em for it. If this guy goes into mind body healing guess who'd all follow. I would be scared of his decisions cause he should have knew back then before he made a dis-ease out of something ya know but now he looks like a hero that he's breaking his new found knowledge out. This is good to know since we know how to be better but for all of the structural folks. What is it going to be called now? The disease formerly known as Fibro
 
Steve - thanks for your words; as always they never fail to inspire me. Your compassion always hits the spot, and makes me pause to really think about the way I'm trying to effect a recovery. We have talked before by e-mail - you were my "Baker Street Muse".

On reflection, I appear to be still at the "thinking I might have TMS" stage. My fears are many and all-consuming. It's true, I have done a lot of reflecting about the past, and more recently, have been trying to focus on the here and now - what's really bugging me about my life now. Your post about SMTs resonated with me, because since my son left home and I finished work, I have been searching for something to focus on. But I've been prevaricating for far too long; switching between drawing, writing and different forms of physical exercise, never settling on just one or maybe two activities that I can really get my teeth into. The truth is I'm having a hard time disengaging "ego" from these activities, and the result is added pressure and pain. I try far too hard at everything, instead of just doing things for the fun of it. At the moment, painting the house, while listening and whistling along to the velvety tones of Paul Simon have been more beneficial than anything.

I used to do a lot of running in my younger days, only entering races on rare occasions, because I just liked the running, and wasn't interested in competing. I stopped because of niggling achilles, knee and IT band injuries. My knee still niggles just walking.

Because I failed this year to come off my meds, I was trying to talk myself into believing that I was just taking them to alleviate the symptoms of TMS; reducing them again, with a goal of coming off them entirely, when I felt a significant reduction in pain. But that hasn't happened. So, I must now take Mermaid's advice - keeping those words of "it was the best thing I ever did" firmly fixed in my mind, and try once again to come off the drugs.

Cath
 
Hi, Cath.
I always feel better when I'm busy, and doing things I enjoy.
I'm very fortunate in that I love writing and my mind is sharp as ever.
I write books for all ages on all subjects (see a list at
walteroleksybooks.com

I'm always researching and writing on a new book idea.
I've had many books published by traditional publishers but
they're taking few new manuscripts so I'm selfpublishing, free,
from CreateSpace and love it.

You need to find one or two projects to interest you.
If possible, volunteer at hospitals, retirement homes, etc.
A cousin found great fulfillment and use of her spare time in
being the person who delivered mail at a retirement home.
 
The Fool said:
Steve - thanks for your words; as always they never fail to inspire me. Your compassion always hits the spot, and makes me pause to really think about the way I'm trying to effect a recovery. We have talked before by e-mail - you were my "Baker Street Muse".

On reflection, I appear to be still at the "thinking I might have TMS" stage. My fears are many and all-consuming. It's true, I have done a lot of reflecting about the past, and more recently, have been trying to focus on the here and now - what's really bugging me about my life now. Your post about SMTs resonated with me, because since my son left home and I finished work, I have been searching for something to focus on. But I've been prevaricating for far too long; switching between drawing, writing and different forms of physical exercise, never settling on just one or maybe two activities that I can really get my teeth into. The truth is I'm having a hard time disengaging "ego" from these activities, and the result is added pressure and pain. I try far too hard at everything, instead of just doing things for the fun of it. At the moment, painting the house, while listening and whistling along to the velvety tones of Paul Simon have been more beneficial than anything.

I used to do a lot of running in my younger days, only entering races on rare occasions, because I just liked the running, and wasn't interested in competing. I stopped because of niggling achilles, knee and IT band injuries. My knee still niggles just walking.

Because I failed this year to come off my meds, I was trying to talk myself into believing that I was just taking them to alleviate the symptoms of TMS; reducing them again, with a goal of coming off them entirely, when I felt a significant reduction in pain. But that hasn't happened. So, I must now take Mermaid's advice - keeping those words of "it was the best thing I ever did" firmly fixed in my mind, and try once again to come off the drugs.

Cath
Click to expand...
I know this is for Steve but I had to say, you mentioned how you felt better
listening to Paul Simon. So if you can go back to doing the things you
always loved to do. That will be a powerful tool to add to your
growing knowledge. Bless you
 
Walt - took a peak at your website. Wow! You certainly have written a lot of books on a variety of different subjects. And you've led such an interesting life. I'm really not a serious writer, but have always been an avid reader. Reading is very important to me; I can lose myself in a book, and it also helps to subdue my constant internal chatter.

Eric - you're so right about doing more of the things I have always loved to do. I would like to get back to the running - and this has to become my goal. I have tried, but know I need to take it steady. Sneak up on it with short bursts, rather than trying too hard.

Thank you to everyone for your replies and support.
 
The Fool said:
Walt - took a peak at your website. Wow! You certainly have written a lot of books on a variety of different subjects. And you've led such an interesting life. I'm really not a serious writer, but have always been an avid reader. Reading is very important to me; I can lose myself in a book, and it also helps to subdue my constant internal chatter.

Eric - you're so right about doing more of the things I have always loved to do. I would like to get back to the running - and this has to become my goal. I have tried, but know I need to take it steady. Sneak up on it with short bursts, rather than trying too hard.

Thank you to everyone for your replies and support.
Click to expand...
Awesome. I started back with the Goal to be able to run again too.
I know exactly what your saying, one step at a time will get you there.
You will turn it all around when you just believe and flow.
Bless You
 
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