Urbanjourney
Newcomer
I find it interesting to see how my mind wanders up and down the list to pick one and try to pay attention if it's avoiding others. I've got plenty of events to work through but chose starting a new job at a company and after a very long drive (around 8 hours) to get there, I ended up having an anxiety attack and went to bed rather than going out to dinner with the team. This job turned out to the one of the most toxic jobs i had and although i felt it easy to write continuously about the experience, i still had this sensation of being disconnected from the actual feeling of it - I have memories (like a short film of the sequence) however I couldn't actually connect in with the feeling.
I've always found it difficult to do body scans etc that my wife explains to me but i just can't seem to feel it....perhaps this is contributing to my TMS.
I remember being nicely forced by my ex wife to see a psychologist because i was always disconnected from certain emotional events that others felt i should have more empathy of...try as I might, i felt like i was faking it.
Writing this has actually given me some more insight on where to focus next - the power of writing!
On activities that I really enjoyed doing and have stopped out of fear of bringing on more pain, one is taking a night time walk at a stunning lake near us that is close to the city. It's around a 4.8km loop and theres usually only a handful of people still out so it felt magical. This is what i'm going to commit to this week.
I've always found it difficult to do body scans etc that my wife explains to me but i just can't seem to feel it....perhaps this is contributing to my TMS.
I remember being nicely forced by my ex wife to see a psychologist because i was always disconnected from certain emotional events that others felt i should have more empathy of...try as I might, i felt like i was faking it.
Writing this has actually given me some more insight on where to focus next - the power of writing!
On activities that I really enjoyed doing and have stopped out of fear of bringing on more pain, one is taking a night time walk at a stunning lake near us that is close to the city. It's around a 4.8km loop and theres usually only a handful of people still out so it felt magical. This is what i'm going to commit to this week.