dreissner
New Member
I'm a long-time student of TMS pain and very familiar with the subject. I've had three episodes of different types of TMS:
From 2001-2007 I was suffering from excruciating pain in my hands, especially while typing on the computer. My hands and arms felt like they were on fire, burning with pain, and I also experienced a lot of numbness. It made my life hell, since I couldn't do my work. All of my waking hours were focused on the pain. Even at night, I was sleeping with arm braces, scared to injure my hands from lying "wrong" on them. During this time I went from doctor to doctor, and everyone I saw told me it was something else. The neurosurgeon told me it was arthritis, the spine surgeon and chiropractor told me there was a "subluxation" in my spine, and the hand surgeon told me it was carpal tunnel syndrome. I was convinced I had carpal tunnel syndrome. When a friend recommended Dr. Sarno's book, I instantly saw myself described in the book. I am the "Type T" personality that Dr. Sarno talks about. I saw the connection between the huge stresses in my life and the pain. The more I made these connections, the more the pain lessened, until it disappeared completely.
In 2010, during another stressful period, I suddenly began having knee pain. It started during a vacation that was extremely stressful (for positive reasons -- it was a lot more social activity than I was used to), and it meant that I had to spend a lot of time alone in the hotel room icing my knee. It was perfect. Only in hindsight did I see that the knee pain was serving a purpose. After the vacation, I continued to limp around for another six months. The pain was not going away. When I finally went to my family doctor, she said that it's a very common symptom, and that the cause is not really understood well, and that there is no effective treatment other than rest and icing. At that moment something clicked. This sounded just like all the other TMS symptoms: Mysterious origin, no known cause or cure. Only at that moment did I recognize it as TMS. I am not making this up: As I walked down the stairs from the doctor's office, I noticed that my knee pain was gone. Usually walking down stairs was the most painful movement for my knees. I was amazed. The knee pain came back for a few days a year later, but as soon as I made the connection to emotional stress it was gone again.
There was another TMS experience in 2010: After a very stressful event, I suddenly developed severe cramping pain in my testicles. Fearing something very serious (I immediately thought testicular cancer) I went to the hospital and had an ultrasound scan done. The diagnosis was "epididymitis", a very common pain symptom. It fit the TMS pattern: Epididymitis has no known cause, no known cure. The doctor told me that he himself once had epididymitis during a stressful time in college, and eventually it just disappeared. When he said that it clicked again in my head: I went home and looked up epididymitis in the index of Dr. Sarno's book. I couldn't believe it, but there it was: It was listed as one of the TMS symptoms. When I saw it in the book, I actually broke down and cried. I couldn't believe it, and at the same time, I knew it made sense. As I was crying out of relief, the pain disappeared within minutes. That pain has never come back.
Fast forward to 2013: I'm doing great, but my life is in transition for completely normal (and very positive!) reasons. In the summer of 2013, after having started a very heavy workout program in the gym, I suddenly develop excruciating pain in my right shoulder. It hurts to move my arm, especially in the over-head position. Push-ups, which I had recently started doing a lot of, were the most painful. I went to the doctor and had an MRI done. The diagnosis on the MRI was vague and included a lot of related conditions: rotator cuff tendinosis (tendinosis is a "chronic" form of the better-known tendonitis), mild thickening of the supraspinatus and infraspinatus tendons (but no tear), bursitis. The MRI also mentioned the words "subacromial impingement syndrome". [When I looked this up, it said that the cause of subacromial impingement syndrome is not entirely clear, and that surgery is only sometimes effective, and about as effective as just doing physical therapy. Even though this screams TMS to me now, it didn't click with me at the time.] After getting this diagnosis I was horrified. I felt very depressed and was convinced I would eventually need surgery.
The doctor said it was too early for surgery and he recommended rest, NSAIDs (non-steroidal anti-inflammatory drugs), and physical therapy. I went to physical therapy from October 2013 until April 2013. The shoulder pain only improved very slightly. It was still painful to do anything with my arm. During this time I had also been entering a new phase in my life, and the shoulder pain meant that I could not really participate in those new things. Over this last year I spent a lot of time researching shoulder injuries, staying at home and nursing my shoulder with various rehabilitation exercises and icing. I was visiting shoulder specialists, and was considering surgery. I had to be careful: I read that the subacromial impingement syndrome can get worse over time and can turn into a rotator cuff tear, or "frozen shoulder". All of this was occupying my mind 24/7, to the point that I could not do anything else. When I was talking to people, I wasn't really there, I was just thinking about my shoulder pain. Every time I raised my arm to flip on a lightswitch, my shoulder flared up. Everytime I shook someone's hand my shoulder flared up. Opening the car door hurt. Closing the car door hurt. My waking hours were dominated by the pain and the injury. Every time I thought about having fun, or meeting people, I always had an excuse for why I couldn't: I had to stay home and research shoulder injuries online, and do hours of rehabilitation exercises every day. The only thing that made it better was getting a massage on my shoulder, and taking a very hot shower. That provided temporary relief. Another thing I had noticed was that on rare days when the shoulder pain was gone, I would have splitting headaches instead. (Those details also scream TMS to me now.)
One week ago I looked up "shoulder" in Dr. Sarno's book "The Mindbody Prescription". For some reason I didn't remember it mentioning shoulders at all, but in the book Dr. Sarno clearly states that he considers shoulder pain to be just another TMS symptom. In fact he specifically mentions rotator cuff problems, and he says that most tendon pain, in fact, is due to TMS. His other book, "The Divided Mind", has even more mentions of shoulder pain, and also includes all the terms that were on my MRI: bursitis, impingement syndrome, tendonitis. He even says that rotator cuff tears (which I don't even have) are a part of the aging process, and are usually asymptomatic.
Suddenly I felt like a huge burden was lifted from my shoulders, literally. I made the connection. The shoulder pain, while extremely frustrating, had been serving an important purpose: It was keeping me emotionally closed off from the world.
The day after reading about shoulder pain in Dr. Sarno's book ", I woke up for the first time without any pain. I had been waking up with a very stiff and painful shoulder every morning, but the day after reading the book: no pain! Over the next few days the pain continued to lessen. Raising my arm didn't hurt. Opening and closing doors: no pain. Shaking hands: no pain. (I did notice feeling more nervous, as there was now nothing for me to "hide" behind). A few days later there was only a tiny amount of pain left. I was not thinking about the shoulder pain at all! All of this happened over the course of last week.
The reason I'm concerned now is that after doing push-ups again the last couple of days (the exercise that was the most painful right after the shoulder injury happened), my shoulder feels like it has flared up again. I keep thinking to myself: If the pain went away so dramatically just after reading the Dr. Sarno book, then it must be TMS. My shoulder pain had never decreased like that before. But now, after doing the exercise that I originally believed caused the injury in the first place, and the shoulder flaring up again, doubts are setting in.
I would appreciate any comments, especially if you've had any similar experiences.
P.S.: It took me about an hour to write this post. After I finished writing it I noticed that my shoulder actually felt much relieved. However, I also developed a headache, which I did not have when I started writing this post.
From 2001-2007 I was suffering from excruciating pain in my hands, especially while typing on the computer. My hands and arms felt like they were on fire, burning with pain, and I also experienced a lot of numbness. It made my life hell, since I couldn't do my work. All of my waking hours were focused on the pain. Even at night, I was sleeping with arm braces, scared to injure my hands from lying "wrong" on them. During this time I went from doctor to doctor, and everyone I saw told me it was something else. The neurosurgeon told me it was arthritis, the spine surgeon and chiropractor told me there was a "subluxation" in my spine, and the hand surgeon told me it was carpal tunnel syndrome. I was convinced I had carpal tunnel syndrome. When a friend recommended Dr. Sarno's book, I instantly saw myself described in the book. I am the "Type T" personality that Dr. Sarno talks about. I saw the connection between the huge stresses in my life and the pain. The more I made these connections, the more the pain lessened, until it disappeared completely.
In 2010, during another stressful period, I suddenly began having knee pain. It started during a vacation that was extremely stressful (for positive reasons -- it was a lot more social activity than I was used to), and it meant that I had to spend a lot of time alone in the hotel room icing my knee. It was perfect. Only in hindsight did I see that the knee pain was serving a purpose. After the vacation, I continued to limp around for another six months. The pain was not going away. When I finally went to my family doctor, she said that it's a very common symptom, and that the cause is not really understood well, and that there is no effective treatment other than rest and icing. At that moment something clicked. This sounded just like all the other TMS symptoms: Mysterious origin, no known cause or cure. Only at that moment did I recognize it as TMS. I am not making this up: As I walked down the stairs from the doctor's office, I noticed that my knee pain was gone. Usually walking down stairs was the most painful movement for my knees. I was amazed. The knee pain came back for a few days a year later, but as soon as I made the connection to emotional stress it was gone again.
There was another TMS experience in 2010: After a very stressful event, I suddenly developed severe cramping pain in my testicles. Fearing something very serious (I immediately thought testicular cancer) I went to the hospital and had an ultrasound scan done. The diagnosis was "epididymitis", a very common pain symptom. It fit the TMS pattern: Epididymitis has no known cause, no known cure. The doctor told me that he himself once had epididymitis during a stressful time in college, and eventually it just disappeared. When he said that it clicked again in my head: I went home and looked up epididymitis in the index of Dr. Sarno's book. I couldn't believe it, but there it was: It was listed as one of the TMS symptoms. When I saw it in the book, I actually broke down and cried. I couldn't believe it, and at the same time, I knew it made sense. As I was crying out of relief, the pain disappeared within minutes. That pain has never come back.
Fast forward to 2013: I'm doing great, but my life is in transition for completely normal (and very positive!) reasons. In the summer of 2013, after having started a very heavy workout program in the gym, I suddenly develop excruciating pain in my right shoulder. It hurts to move my arm, especially in the over-head position. Push-ups, which I had recently started doing a lot of, were the most painful. I went to the doctor and had an MRI done. The diagnosis on the MRI was vague and included a lot of related conditions: rotator cuff tendinosis (tendinosis is a "chronic" form of the better-known tendonitis), mild thickening of the supraspinatus and infraspinatus tendons (but no tear), bursitis. The MRI also mentioned the words "subacromial impingement syndrome". [When I looked this up, it said that the cause of subacromial impingement syndrome is not entirely clear, and that surgery is only sometimes effective, and about as effective as just doing physical therapy. Even though this screams TMS to me now, it didn't click with me at the time.] After getting this diagnosis I was horrified. I felt very depressed and was convinced I would eventually need surgery.
The doctor said it was too early for surgery and he recommended rest, NSAIDs (non-steroidal anti-inflammatory drugs), and physical therapy. I went to physical therapy from October 2013 until April 2013. The shoulder pain only improved very slightly. It was still painful to do anything with my arm. During this time I had also been entering a new phase in my life, and the shoulder pain meant that I could not really participate in those new things. Over this last year I spent a lot of time researching shoulder injuries, staying at home and nursing my shoulder with various rehabilitation exercises and icing. I was visiting shoulder specialists, and was considering surgery. I had to be careful: I read that the subacromial impingement syndrome can get worse over time and can turn into a rotator cuff tear, or "frozen shoulder". All of this was occupying my mind 24/7, to the point that I could not do anything else. When I was talking to people, I wasn't really there, I was just thinking about my shoulder pain. Every time I raised my arm to flip on a lightswitch, my shoulder flared up. Everytime I shook someone's hand my shoulder flared up. Opening the car door hurt. Closing the car door hurt. My waking hours were dominated by the pain and the injury. Every time I thought about having fun, or meeting people, I always had an excuse for why I couldn't: I had to stay home and research shoulder injuries online, and do hours of rehabilitation exercises every day. The only thing that made it better was getting a massage on my shoulder, and taking a very hot shower. That provided temporary relief. Another thing I had noticed was that on rare days when the shoulder pain was gone, I would have splitting headaches instead. (Those details also scream TMS to me now.)
One week ago I looked up "shoulder" in Dr. Sarno's book "The Mindbody Prescription". For some reason I didn't remember it mentioning shoulders at all, but in the book Dr. Sarno clearly states that he considers shoulder pain to be just another TMS symptom. In fact he specifically mentions rotator cuff problems, and he says that most tendon pain, in fact, is due to TMS. His other book, "The Divided Mind", has even more mentions of shoulder pain, and also includes all the terms that were on my MRI: bursitis, impingement syndrome, tendonitis. He even says that rotator cuff tears (which I don't even have) are a part of the aging process, and are usually asymptomatic.
Suddenly I felt like a huge burden was lifted from my shoulders, literally. I made the connection. The shoulder pain, while extremely frustrating, had been serving an important purpose: It was keeping me emotionally closed off from the world.
The day after reading about shoulder pain in Dr. Sarno's book ", I woke up for the first time without any pain. I had been waking up with a very stiff and painful shoulder every morning, but the day after reading the book: no pain! Over the next few days the pain continued to lessen. Raising my arm didn't hurt. Opening and closing doors: no pain. Shaking hands: no pain. (I did notice feeling more nervous, as there was now nothing for me to "hide" behind). A few days later there was only a tiny amount of pain left. I was not thinking about the shoulder pain at all! All of this happened over the course of last week.
The reason I'm concerned now is that after doing push-ups again the last couple of days (the exercise that was the most painful right after the shoulder injury happened), my shoulder feels like it has flared up again. I keep thinking to myself: If the pain went away so dramatically just after reading the Dr. Sarno book, then it must be TMS. My shoulder pain had never decreased like that before. But now, after doing the exercise that I originally believed caused the injury in the first place, and the shoulder flaring up again, doubts are setting in.
I would appreciate any comments, especially if you've had any similar experiences.
P.S.: It took me about an hour to write this post. After I finished writing it I noticed that my shoulder actually felt much relieved. However, I also developed a headache, which I did not have when I started writing this post.
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((((..there was a physyotherapist who is sort of spiritual (cigun, yoga, vegan, martial arts...) dude, who told me there is a big tension in my body, and told me everyting seems to normal about my health problems.......