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What was your take-away from last night's call?

Discussion in 'General Discussion Subforum' started by North Star, Mar 26, 2014.

  1. North Star

    North Star Beloved Grand Eagle

    If you missed the call from last night, be sure and listen to the recording of it…it was just great!

    The SteveO you grow to love in the book is the same SteveO to hear speak. His knowledge and passion for helping others heal shines through.

    On that note…what was your biggest take-away from last night?

    For me, it's hard to pick just one thing. I really appreciated the encouragement concerning Achille's tendon swelling. With something that visual, it's easy to go into panic mode wondering if something structural is going on. Come to find out, some of the TMS docs and Steve himself have dealt with this.

    I also loved hearing the different voices. Mala, I love your British accent! (I know, we Americans have a thing about that.) I was also so impressed that you speak SEVEN languages! Walt, you're just as I envisioned….gentle and kind. Rose, my New Joisey friend! Tennis Tom, your passion shines through and you always add so much. MiffyBunny, I wish I could take you away to a deserted island (except for some servants who would wait on you hand and foot), for a few weeks where you could just be pampered and free of all responsibilities. Ah, what a great group of people.

    But back to the call...I think the biggest thing though was the "are you enjoying your life" question. Those weren't the exact words but it was the gist. (Actually, I'm wishing I wrote down a few particularly insightful statements; I'll have to listen to the recording to get them.)

    If you're busy enjoying life, you don't have time for TMS distractions. This really struck home with me this morning.

    After the usual morning rush of getting everyone out the door (I still have two kids at home), I had my usual wave of fatigue wash over me. I mean F-A-T-I-Q-U-E. It's arrival midmorning is something that's been part of my life for as long as I can remember. I used to joke that it's just become my serum caffeine levels have dipped. It occurred to me for the first time that this is TMS. The urge to go to sleep at 9:30 in the morning isn't normal.

    I realized I need to dig deeper into this. I'm not enjoying my life. I can put up a good show; I don't think anyone benefits from a frownie face. I practice gratitude daily…make it a point to be upbeat.

    Which leaves me..uh…wanting to throw Steve across the room like I did Dr. Sarno's book when I first read it?

    Nah. Don't worry, Steve, you're safe. I won't shoot the messenger.

    But whoa. That's a pretty deep and serious subject. I'm not sure how to approach it because I can see where my life, for the past 20 years, has been spent raising my kids and pretty much serving my family. The empty nest is still a few years away so it's not like my mama duties are completed. (Are they ever?)

    I'm seeing a connection to this topic and my swollen Achilles and I gotta say…it scares the hell out of me. I'm down a new avenue of self exploration now.

    Okay. Don't want to end on such a heavy note. Overall, it was a fantastic phone call.

    Forest, you did a FABULOUS job moderating. Herbie, even though you were on the phone, it was great seeing your face. I appreciated the other faces too..Bruce and Mala.

    But the star of the show last night was Steve. THANK YOU for the time and encouragement you freely poured out!

    What are your take aways?
    Mala, G.R. and Becca like this.
  2. Pandagirl

    Pandagirl Peer Supporter

    Really enjoyed the call! As always, Steve was full of great information!

    My takeaways are that I cannot envision myself without symptoms and I calendar watch. I can tell you the exact date that this began, all with the pregnancy/birth of my first child. My experience as a mother is that of physical pain. I can't imagine myself without it...yet. I barely remember what it was like to not feel this way. And it's been 40 months! Although, really I've had TMS as far back as I can remember with migraines and other illnesses brought on by stress. Lots of things to think about today! :)
    G.R. and North Star like this.
  3. Walt Oleksy (RIP 2021)

    Walt Oleksy (RIP 2021) Beloved Grand Eagle

    Hi! I too thought it was a fantastic call-in. A real treat to hear Steve and get so much TMS knowledge from him.
    Also great to hear everyone's voices. I don't have a camera for my computer so I didn't get to see the Fuze video.
    I'll have to work on that. I get tired of trying to keep up with new technology.

    My takeaways were also to do as Steve says and forget about any pain or anxiety and just enjoy each hour of each day.

    Also, we need to be good to ourselves... balance serving others with serving ourselves.

    And to constantly remind ourselves that our symptoms are not structural but psychological from TMS and
    not to judge progress by a calendar.

    All in all, last night was like a free private session with a TMS therapist. The audio will be great to listen to and save.

    I slept like a baby last night. I thought my head would be too full of heavy thinking to sleep, but it was fine.
    North Star likes this.
  4. LindaRK

    LindaRK Well known member

    I thought the call in was great .... it's one thing to correspond with folks via posting, but to hear voices and see faces makes it all that much more real.

    Northstar, you're absolutely right (and Steve) that we need to start enjoying our life to do away with our TMS symptoms. Hubby and I are self-employed - business is always cyclical. When it's slow, the first thing my husband reminds me about is how "things" start happening (TMS symptoms). Yep, that's absolutely right. Down time is my enemy, although there is a happy medium. I don't want to be a busybody doing mindless work and activities either.

    I did have an "aha" moment last night from something that Forest said .... about "structure" ...... I want to follow up on that. If I understood what he said, it's that TMS doesn't like structure? If that's true, oh my ..... I think this will add to my journaling activity.
    North Star likes this.
  5. Forest

    Forest Beloved Grand Eagle

    Heya, Linda, it was more that TMSers tend to structure their lives very heavily and that feeling like we need to adhere to that structure can, for some people, contribute to our unconscious reservoir of rage. Learning to feel like we don't have to follow that structure and can be more free can sometimes help us relax.

    Updated 3/28/2014:
    I originally posted a rough preliminary recording of the call to give people access to the recording sooner rather than later. Here is the final recording of the event:

    Click here to download the mp3 audio
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 28, 2014
  6. North Star

    North Star Beloved Grand Eagle

    Pandagirl- I think motherhood today is more challenging than ever. There is little support for families; every one is so busy just trying to keep their heads above water. When my three kids were little, I would have given my eye teeth for a helpful sister or grandparent…but alas… I can look back and see where my TMS kicked into high gear under those pressures.

    Thankfully, having this knowledge is so empowering. And yes, like Walt said, last night was like getting free time with a TMS therapist!

    Linda, we're self employed too. Hubby's a CPA which means mega mega hours and then come April 16, the speeding train stops. So I understand the ups and downs.

    Forest, thanks for getting that audio up so quickly, I can listen on my iPod!
  7. Ellen

    Ellen Beloved Grand Eagle

    Yes, it was a wonderful call. Forest, you did a great job of moderating, and thanks so much for organizing it. And thanks to all of you who asked such great questions. And, of course, Steve was great! I have no doubt that everything he said is Truth and is the path to healing. And I appreciate the clarity, compassion, and passion in which he delivers his message. Thanks, Steve!

    I did walk away feeling a bit overwhelmed by the work ahead for me. It seems to me that TMS healing is like trying to thread a needle that has a very small hole with a large and rather frayed thread--it can be done, but takes a lot of patience, clear focus, and a steady hand. As I looked over my notes from the call, I could see why I walked away with this image. My summary:

    The Yin and Yang of TMS Healing:
    • take control of your life, but de-structure your life
    • confront TMS, but don't try to heal
    • find your passion in life, but let go of attachments
    • visualize yourself as healed, but don't focus on your body

    OK.....I can do this. :)........with the help of all you wonderful people.
    G.R., North Star and Forest like this.
  8. Forest

    Forest Beloved Grand Eagle

    During the call, we also discussed existential anxieties (death, connection, etc.) as a source of TMS. In particular, Steve talked about an article by Peter Zafirides, MD, about the existential therapy and TMS. Dr. Zafirides has given us permission to cover this article during our call in discussion group, so if people want to take a look and see what it is about, here is the link: Existential Psychotherapy: How The Search For Meaning Can Heal Us

    If you are more of an audio person, Dr. Z did a series of podcasts on the four existential anxieties. Here's the link to get you started: The Role of Existential Anxiety in TMS Pain. About this podcast, @JanAtheCPA wrote,
    Don't forget that you don't have to read everything, though. Healing from TMS is about a process of relaxing and unwinding. It is about cooling down your nervous system. Many people with TMS have highly agitated nervous systems, so you might look at the links above and have an unconscious feeling of dread come over you. Don't! You most definitely don't have to read everything to heal. Healing is about finding the joy that Steve talked about in the call. Steve put a great deal of thought into the sentence that he closed his book with: "Happiness first, and good health will certainly follow...." Sometimes reading can help us a lot in doing this, but it's important to remember that the most important things you need are already inside of you.

    At some point, I'd love the discussion group to do a five week sequence on the existential anxieties, where we cover one existential anxiety each week. We can read a portion of the article and listen to the corresponding podcast (there are five podcasts - one for each anxiety and one that is an intro).
    LindaRK likes this.
  9. miffybunny

    miffybunny Beloved Grand Eagle

    The call was the boost I needed! I was a ball of tension the whole day and I realized that I needed to call in despite my anxiety. Thanks Forest for sending me the desert island wishes! Even a hotel stay on Rt 17 in NJ would seem like paradise! It was wonderful to hear everyone's voices and the discussion was truly enriching. I also wanted to chime in about the Achilles tendon thing....In Nov. in the midst of my RSD situation, my Achilles tendons swelled up so bad I had to use a wheelchair for a month. I was told that the RSD was feeding it or perhaps spreading (!) but somehow I knew that was a crock. I decided to ditch the wheelchair and within a few weeks the swelling went down to normal. Every once in a while, I get a twinge or the sensation of a needle piercing the tendon but it doesn't bother me because I KNOW that's TMS. I just have to get a better handle on the RSD. A couple of the take aways for me were: not to think of myself as an exception or look for other people's examples, and finding ways to "break the loop" as Steve said. I also think confidence and patience in the process of integration are key. I feel so lucky to have access to this knowledge and I really appreciated the opportunity to ask questions!
    G.R., Ellen and North Star like this.
  10. North Star

    North Star Beloved Grand Eagle

    Ellen, your Yin Yang of TMS Healing is brilliant! And I love your analogy of threading a needle with a frayed thread…that's just perfect.

    Oh, Forest, you know us TMSers too well. I can get overloaded by my drive to JUST.HEAL! And NOW, Damnit! And that quote about "Happiness first, and good health witll certainly follow" is one of those quotes that I thought, "I need to write that down" and then I didn't. ;)

    I LOVE the idea of a 5 week sequence on anxieties. I love what Doc Z wrote about and I'll will listen to those podcasts…at my leisure, that is. It is so cool that he takes the time to offer the encouragement and information.
    G.R., Ellen and Forest like this.
  11. North Star

    North Star Beloved Grand Eagle

    Miffybunny, we were both posting at the same time. I really should just laugh over my Achilles issue. It was just the one ankle for a few years and then poof! It's start doing it on the other foot. And then back to the other. And then back again…It's ridiculous. Through out the course of a day, it can look normal..and then dreadful. I'm learning not to have a knee jerk reaction to compulsively check when it feels tight.

    I'm really giving a lot of thought to "what emotion is hiding out" in the tendons!

    I'm glad you were encouraged by the call. If anyone deserves a boast of encouragement…it is you. tiphata
    Ellen and Forest like this.
  12. tigerlilly

    tigerlilly Well known member

    What I took away from the call, in a nutshell (because there were so many awesome tidbits that I'm still absorbing), was to learn about TMS and how it works, then to learn about yourself (through journaling, meditating, deep breathing, etc), and then...........simply........move forward and live life. Such a simple thought, but there is so much in that. It reminds me of a Scripture I love in Philippians 3:13 where the Apostle Paul was looking toward to the prize of life: "Brothers, I do not yet consider myself as having taken hold of it; but one thing is certain: Forgetting the things behind and stretching forward to the things ahead." Steve makes it sound so easy - find happiness/joy/something you love - and move towards that. The negative and pain will melt and fade away.

    It was wonderful to meet some of you and to hear so many of your voices - it's kind of like putting a face with the name, only it's a voice to the avatar! I appreciate all of you and all of your thoughts and encouragement.

    Walt - Smeagle sends puppy love to Annie!

    Attached Files:

    North Star likes this.
  13. LindaRK

    LindaRK Well known member

    Oh, such a cute dog!
  14. North Star

    North Star Beloved Grand Eagle

    Beautiful thoughts, Tigerlilly. And your doggie is just ador-i-bib-ble!
  15. Walt Oleksy (RIP 2021)

    Walt Oleksy (RIP 2021) Beloved Grand Eagle

    I didn't know Smeagle's body was so gorgeous.
    G.R. and North Star like this.
  16. tigerlilly

    tigerlilly Well known member

    Thanks guys - he's a little sweetie-pie to be sure! When the UPS guy comes, he runs out, jumps up in his truck and waits for his doggie cookie. Once he gets it he runs back inside!
    Walt - here's a picture of Smeagle as a puppy and a picture of his parents; dad is on top, mom is the bottom pic - he definitely takes after his mommy!
    I tried to go through a rescue group when we decided to get a Rat Terrier, but nobody would return my phone calls or emails (and my application showed I was a vet tech; we had a large fenced in yard; stated that he would be an inside dog, etc.) Go figure! So we ended up going through a breeder. But otherwise I'm all about adopting and rescuing!

    Attached Files:

  17. yb44

    yb44 Beloved Grand Eagle

    I just listened to the recording and thoroughly enjoyed it. I know I am one of those living abroad that can't take part because of the time difference but it didn't matter. I got just as much out of it listening to it days later. The information is timeless anyway. There were so many take-aways that I would have to go back and listen again to jot them all down but there are two concepts that stick in my mind. The first is about how the unconscious does not have any concept of time so past and future are happening in the present moment. The other is the concept of deception. We think we are happy or okay about events or conditions in our lives but are we really? The one thing that springs to my mind as I have been pondering it anyway lately my job. I thought this was the ultimate job for me and that I had reached some sort of goal but somehow I feel like I took a wrong turn somewhere and I am not where I want to be. Something else I noted was what happened to my physically towards the end of the webinar. I couldn't help but notice my sciatic pain had ramped up several notches. I haven't been aware of this pain for a couple of months now. I believe the pain hit round the time SteveO talked about how people reading his book would experience strange reactions. Yes, I thought, you are talking about me. It took me over a year to read GPD from cover to cover. I struggled to read other books during this time. Despite his book being packed with useful healing tools and concepts I couldn't concentrate. Whilst reading it I suffered a massive TMS attack, worse than ever before. This was after I had read Chapter 13 and completed SteveO's questionnaire. It was a real OMG moment. It took months to get beyond Chapter 13 and its effect on me was so powerful I had to email SteveO to ask him what the heck was going on with me.

    It was also great to put voices to names/avatars. I felt as if I knew many of you already. Thanks to all who participated, Forest for co-ordinating and hosting, Becca for sorting out the recording and most of all to SteveO because he's just the greatest. :joyful:(N.B. This is the 'joyful' emoticon)
  18. Walt Oleksy (RIP 2021)

    Walt Oleksy (RIP 2021) Beloved Grand Eagle

    Tigerlilly, I love the photo of Smeagle as a puppy and his parents. No wonder you took him!

    Annie also loves UPS trucks. One of the drivers always has a milk bone for her.
    Since that began a few years ago she looks for the trucks and her treat.
    She ignores other trucks. They say dogs are blind, so it must not be the color of the UPS brown truck
    that excites her.
  19. tigerlilly

    tigerlilly Well known member

    That's so cute, Walt, about Annie and the UPS truck. Dogs are waaaay more intelligent than some give them credit for. Smeagle even knows the general time of the day that the UPS guy comes around and will start perking his ears up listening for him. He listens for the sound of his engine, and then anticipates whether he will stop and come to our door. If I don't answer the door (since I'm usually stuck in bed!) the UPS guy will now leave a cookie on top of the package so Smeagle can get it later!

    Attached Files:

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