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What to tell yourself
- Thread starter 2BT4U
- Start date
Ollin
Well known member
That's an excellent question, I believe that depending on how we react to the pain, it will persist or go away.
Simple, but far from easy.
When I feel the pain I look for a psychological event that triggered it. But instead of making me calmer, this thinking conditions me to react with pain to similar stressful events in the future. I don't think this road will lead me anywhere...
Well, I know my pain is TMS, but having it unchanging for 5 years, it's difficult to tell my brain that it will pass soon and disappear eventually. Should I make peace with having to accept it for the rest of my life? My subconscious thinks that accepting/ignoring the pain will only give my body permission to generate more pain, and spread to different areas (which is happening) and generates resistance in the form of negative emotions. So I've started working on this limiting belief but it's tricky.
Simple, but far from easy.
When I feel the pain I look for a psychological event that triggered it. But instead of making me calmer, this thinking conditions me to react with pain to similar stressful events in the future. I don't think this road will lead me anywhere...
Well, I know my pain is TMS, but having it unchanging for 5 years, it's difficult to tell my brain that it will pass soon and disappear eventually. Should I make peace with having to accept it for the rest of my life? My subconscious thinks that accepting/ignoring the pain will only give my body permission to generate more pain, and spread to different areas (which is happening) and generates resistance in the form of negative emotions. So I've started working on this limiting belief but it's tricky.
Tennis Tom
Beloved Grand Eagle
This is what Dr. Sarno recommends :
From the wiki:
"Dr. Sarno has also listed 12 Daily Reminders for people to review throughout their recovery. These can serve as a form of affirmations to be reviewed once a day. They are:
- The pain is due to TMS, not to structural abnormalities
- The direct reason for the pain is mild oxygen deprivation
- TMS is a harmless condition, caused by my repressed emotions
- The principle emotion is my repressed anger
- TMS exists only to distract my attention from the emotions
- Since my back is basically normal there is nothing to fear
- Therefore physical activity is not dangerous
- And I must resume all physical activity
- I will not be concerned or intimidated by the pain
- I will shift my attention from the pain to emotional issues
- I intend to be in control - not my subconscious mind
- I must think psychological at all times, not physical.
Walt Oleksy (RIP 2021)
Beloved Grand Eagle
Wendy, Tennis Tom echoes Dr. Sarno about how to deal with pain.
And I keep thinking positive. Like my mother used to say, "This too shall pass."
Olin, it isn't easy, but you must keep believing in TMS. Pills, surgery are not the answer.
If journaling about repressed emotions and what they might be creates pain,
try forgiveness. That usually involves a compromise with those who have caused you pain.
I've been able to forgive but not always able to forget. Now I work on forgetting by
asking God to bring peace to those who caused me pain, and it helps brings me peace.
And I keep thinking positive. Like my mother used to say, "This too shall pass."
Olin, it isn't easy, but you must keep believing in TMS. Pills, surgery are not the answer.
If journaling about repressed emotions and what they might be creates pain,
try forgiveness. That usually involves a compromise with those who have caused you pain.
I've been able to forgive but not always able to forget. Now I work on forgetting by
asking God to bring peace to those who caused me pain, and it helps brings me peace.
I'm having a bit of trouble trying to figure out what Dr. Sarno means by physiological at all times....I'm guessing he means you need to think about what I'm angry about?
I'm not getting notifications for some reason so if it takes time for me to get back you know why!
Thanks,
Wendy
I'm not getting notifications for some reason so if it takes time for me to get back you know why!
Thanks,
Wendy
Tennis Tom
Beloved Grand Eagle
I think that's "think PSYCHOlogical at all times."
12. I must think psychological at all times, not physical.
12. I must think psychological at all times, not physical.
Andy Bayliss
TMS Coach & Beloved Grand Eagle
Hi Wendy,
"Thinking psychologically" means that you turn your mind away from the habitual thoughts that the cause is physical --in whatever way you typically do, your specific thoughts like "I didn't take my cold foot baths tonight, that's why my feet hurt" or "Maybe my nerve is damaged, like those doctors said." We catch ourselves thinking in the usual, habitual ways that we think about the symptoms. When you notice this, often when in pain, you turn your mind to the possible causes: This can be done cognitively like you suggested about rage. "I wonder if part of me is enraged by what just happened?" "How does my inner child probably feel about the way I just pressured myself?" Also it can be done more somatically: sense into your body and feel. Notice what is up in you. Connect this as the cause.
As far as what I use when I am in pain: I use very effectively this mantra when I am in foot pain: "Stop the foot pain. I am willing to feel my emotions."
The whole point in thinking pychological is not so much that you figure out in-the-moment the exact emotional cause of the pain, as it is that you are turning your mind away from obsessing and fearing and planing about the pain (the normal behaviors) to another way, a truer way, to hold your pain. Then the reasons for the pain to continue are undermined.
You just catch yourself doing the same old trip about the cause of your pain, and you "re-think" and contemplate the (possible) psychological causes. As others have suggested, it is not easy for most, and it also does not have to be done perfectly in my experience. It is an on-going training!
Andy B.
"Thinking psychologically" means that you turn your mind away from the habitual thoughts that the cause is physical --in whatever way you typically do, your specific thoughts like "I didn't take my cold foot baths tonight, that's why my feet hurt" or "Maybe my nerve is damaged, like those doctors said." We catch ourselves thinking in the usual, habitual ways that we think about the symptoms. When you notice this, often when in pain, you turn your mind to the possible causes: This can be done cognitively like you suggested about rage. "I wonder if part of me is enraged by what just happened?" "How does my inner child probably feel about the way I just pressured myself?" Also it can be done more somatically: sense into your body and feel. Notice what is up in you. Connect this as the cause.
As far as what I use when I am in pain: I use very effectively this mantra when I am in foot pain: "Stop the foot pain. I am willing to feel my emotions."
The whole point in thinking pychological is not so much that you figure out in-the-moment the exact emotional cause of the pain, as it is that you are turning your mind away from obsessing and fearing and planing about the pain (the normal behaviors) to another way, a truer way, to hold your pain. Then the reasons for the pain to continue are undermined.
You just catch yourself doing the same old trip about the cause of your pain, and you "re-think" and contemplate the (possible) psychological causes. As others have suggested, it is not easy for most, and it also does not have to be done perfectly in my experience. It is an on-going training!
Andy B.
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Thank you for the reply!
A few questions....
So if I get a pain in my hip, groin, leg etc...I should think to myself why do I have this pain....and think back to whatever may have happened to bring it on?.......Or, should I think to myself,....ok, I'm not getting enough oxygen or blood to the right hip...then tell myself to send oxygen and blood to whichever hip is causing the pain?......maybe I should either think on or the other, whichever works?
I find as the weeks go by I'm not in as much pain....However, I could be just sitting or laying down and have a spot on my leg or hip, back or anywhere it's there then it's gone, is this part of it?
In Dr.Sarnos the divided mind he suggest to do the following and I'm wondering if I'm reading the directions correctly.
Read his books which I have.....then read the psychology or treatment chapter everyday.
Set aside time 15 minutes in the a.m. And 30 minutes in the evening to review the below
Unconscious painful threatening feelings....
Write a list of all things that may contribute to those feelings......(does he mean the feelings I've had throughout the day)?
Forgiving is easy forgetting is the hard part!
A few questions....
So if I get a pain in my hip, groin, leg etc...I should think to myself why do I have this pain....and think back to whatever may have happened to bring it on?.......Or, should I think to myself,....ok, I'm not getting enough oxygen or blood to the right hip...then tell myself to send oxygen and blood to whichever hip is causing the pain?......maybe I should either think on or the other, whichever works?
I find as the weeks go by I'm not in as much pain....However, I could be just sitting or laying down and have a spot on my leg or hip, back or anywhere it's there then it's gone, is this part of it?
In Dr.Sarnos the divided mind he suggest to do the following and I'm wondering if I'm reading the directions correctly.
Read his books which I have.....then read the psychology or treatment chapter everyday.
Set aside time 15 minutes in the a.m. And 30 minutes in the evening to review the below
Unconscious painful threatening feelings....
Write a list of all things that may contribute to those feelings......(does he mean the feelings I've had throughout the day)?
Forgiving is easy forgetting is the hard part!
Tennis Tom
Beloved Grand Eagle
See the Rahe-Holmes list for stressful life events that cause TMS dis-ease:
THE HOLMES-RAHE STRESS SCALE:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Holmes_and_Rahe_stress_scale
THE HOLMES-RAHE STRESS SCALE:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Holmes_and_Rahe_stress_scale
Andy Bayliss
TMS Coach & Beloved Grand Eagle
Yes, you can do either or both. The main thing is to turn your mind away from the habitual "causes and worries around pain" and toward what Dr. Sarno is teaching you!
Tennis Tom
Beloved Grand Eagle
The H-R Scale is for events in the "past year":
From the Wiki:
"To measure stress according to the Holmes and Rahe Stress Scale, the number of "Life Change Units" that apply to events in the past year of an individual's life are added and the final score will give a rough estimate of how stress affects health."
SusieQ
New Member
Just out of curiosity I re-took the "Holmes & Rahe Stress Scale". My therapist first introduced me to it a number of years ago - my score today?
Same as its been for 3 years ... 675!
I don't entirely agree with the "past one year" statute - regardless of when stressful events took place in your life, if you're still living with the pain, fear, anger - it has to be figured into your ability to heal! Lingering emotions that lead to TMS just don't disappear without hard work!
Same as its been for 3 years ... 675!
I don't entirely agree with the "past one year" statute - regardless of when stressful events took place in your life, if you're still living with the pain, fear, anger - it has to be figured into your ability to heal! Lingering emotions that lead to TMS just don't disappear without hard work!