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What helped me heal my pain and porn addiciton

Discussion in 'General Discussion Subforum' started by Secret Habit, Nov 23, 2018.

  1. Secret Habit

    Secret Habit New Member

    Hey everyone - Something I wrote about on my blog a while back that I thought I would share

    Its not groundbreaking news regarding TMS exercises BUT I thought it may be encouraging and simple reminder of the power of reflection, understanding and forgiveness

    This helped me overcome wrist pain, eye pain, back pain, porn addiciton, and much more!


    • Ask Yourself Questions
    1. Find a quiet spot and take some time to calm down and get focused (Have ZERO expectations on the time it may take)
    2. Start asking yourself simple questions (Do not be "PC"... This is for you alone)
    -ex. "Where does my fear of ___ come from?"; "What still hurts me from my childhood?";
    "Why am I so bothered by ___?"; "What are the 10 worst moments of my life?"
    3. Write down everything and anything that comes to mind - Positive or negative, it all plays a role in what you do today.


    • Do an inventory
    1. Categorize your Wounds - ex. People, Experiences, Objects and take the time to reflect on each of them.
    2. Follow the chart at the bottom of the page (Or see the headers below in bold) - Fill out with total honesty for each Person, Experience, and/or Object (There may be 10, or there may be 1000... There is no set number nor is there a set time frame on how long it may take)

    (The chart wouldn't paste so here's the list in non-chart form lol)
    Person/Experience/Object - Who or what is the object of my resentment or fear
    The Cause - Which specific action/situation hurt me?
    The Effect - What effect did that have on my life?
    The Damage - What damage did that do to my basic social, security, and/or sexual instincts?
    My Part - What part of the emotions feet am I responsible for?
    Who are the people I have hurt?
    How have I hurt them?


    • Take the next step
    1. Get a foothold on these Wounds - Read over each chart you filled out for the individual Person, Experience, or Object and start to reflect on each of them. The "My part" section was very revealing for me personally as I realized SO many of my resentments, and so much of my pain was self-inflicted... it was very healing but also very difficult to admit this.
    2. Do what needs to be done - Forgiveness must happen... As a Christian, my outlook on forgiveness may differ from yours but a lot of religions and value systems involve forgiveness so its time to exercise this muscle! This is the time to forgive them in your heart before you do so in person. A couple of options are:
    1. Writing a letter that you later throw out - The release of writing it all on paper is very healing.
    2. Visualize meeting with the person or object and sharing how what they did was hurtful but you have chosen to forgive them.

    One thing that I recently did do was write letters to my parents and actually gave them to them! In the letters I had:
    1. things they did that I appreciate
    2. Things they did that wounded me
    3. My forgiveness
    It was and has been powerful since! Thought this may be an encouraging word for someone as it was something I out off for a loooong time and am now SO glad I did it :)


    Hope this helps!


     
    HattieNC, Tirian and readytoheal like this.

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