1. Alan has completed the new Pain Recovery Program. To read or share it, use this link: http://go.tmswiki.org/newprogram
    Dismiss Notice

Day 23 Unavoidable stress, how to handle?

Discussion in 'Structured Educational Program' started by Hedger, Dec 19, 2020.

  1. Hedger

    Hedger Peer Supporter

    So let´s see if someone can come with good tips, or at least encouragement on this one.

    I think it is good to manage your stress by doing less and prioritize yourself. But some things can not be cut off:

    So I´m coming into this already a bit exhausted and a bit frustrated from last weekend. Planning to have a week more focused on me. And then, both my kid and I get sick! So I´m already tired, now I´m sick. And in this state I have to ignore that and take care of my kid.

    So after several days of a sick kid crying, screaming and fever bla bla bla - my pain is again rising a lot and my energy is 0 since I´m sick myself (it´s not Covid-19, we had that earlier). I can feel the anger, I just want to be alone and rest. But I can't. This is the worst pain setback so far. And I can't do anything about it.
    - You have to take care of a sick kid.
    - It´s Corona times so you can't ask anyone else to take care of a sick kid (except my wife but she works during days).

    Now its Saturday and my Wife takes the sick kid, it got me relaxed and now my back and hip pain is going down again.

    So is it just acceptance here? It sucks, but soon it will end and you can lower your stress and pain again?
    Or any other tips?
     
    Balsa11 likes this.
  2. Baseball65

    Baseball65 Beloved Grand Eagle

    Well, you obviously know where the pain is coming from. Being aware that parental responsibilities generates rage takes a lot of courage and honesty...but now, What to do?

    This is where Sarno was silent. He told us where it came from and implies awareness removes it..and it does, MOST of the time. But in situations where we feel stuck, we might need 'more'. I guess he knew we'd figure it out one way or another.

    After I got better from the majority of my TMS symptoms, I was left with a residue of rage that I knew if not handled properly would bring back my symptoms. I was afraid of ME....I got some therapy for a few months. I also went and dove into every single spiritual discipline that made sense to me. After much study, I narrowed it down to a few practical systems. Any time the crap tries to come back I write a list of rage makers (you already seem to be aware of this), than crack open one of my old standby's and reflect on how spiritual I am NOT. (LOL)

    It's kind of like that story Jesus tells in the Bible. A guy has a demon cast out of him (TMS). The demon goes looking for a new home but finds only dry desolation. Then he returns home and find the place neatly swept but EMPTY.(I didn't fill up or replace that unconsciousness) The Demon goes and gets six other demons (other weird symptoms) and they all move in and now the guy is worse off then before. (shoulder, teeth, stomach issues, hand issues, ad nauseum)

    It was amazing how much of the bible that made no sense to me came alive after TMS. I just replaced Demons with TMS, Dragons and Imagery with the unconscious, the mountain with healing and so forth. I learned a lot of that from Emmet Fox and it has been uber helpful

    I loathe that word... it's been kicked around so long it's lost its original meaning .... I was 'accepting' tons of crap when I had TMS . I prefer 'surrender'. It signifies the end of hostilities...and pain.

    I watched my Mom with Dementia for a couple of years. It was tough. TMS made many incursions but I always beat it back with the support of my understanding friends and spiritual study. I personally ended with Eckhart Tolle, Emmet Fox and the bible, but I am certain all roads lead to the top of the mountain.
    . and if you just need a bro to vent to, PM me.

    it's totally beatable....

    peace
     
    Balsa11, MWsunin12 and Hedger like this.
  3. Hedger

    Hedger Peer Supporter

    Yeah, the fact that parenting is very difficult sometimes, even rage producing, does not lower the amount of love involved. It feels good to allow myself to express to other adults that I feel angry at situations involving my kid (but not acting out on it). Having kids is the best thing that ever happened to me, yet sometimes exhausting. It´s like now I really know what "unconditional love" means in terms of feeling it and not intellectually. But that doesn't mean that everything is easy...

    Thanks! Maybe I´ll take you up on that some day.
    I live in a non-religious country in Europe, so discussing the bible is unlikely hehe. But I do understand how faith can help. Sometimes I wish I was more spiritual and less scientific. But I´ll start with exploring the emotional me!
     
    JanAtheCPA likes this.

Share This Page