To my fellow 'Type Ts'... what's your occupation?

alexross_pa_bloom

alexross_pa_bloom

Newcomer
Hi all,

I'm Alex, a recovered TMS chronic pain sufferer, current Mind-Body Practitioner, Physician Assistant, and mom...

...I am also a recovering perfectionist, high-achiever, & people pleaser! I know I'm in good company here, anyone else?!

Unsurprisingly, my 'Type T' personality traits helped me achieve a rigorous scientific & medical career where I studied and worked with the best and the brightest (at least on paper), had great publishing success, job offers, salaries, etc.

Of course, though, these same personality traits contributed LARGELY to my development of chronic pain (daily migraines x3 years), as I have ALWAYS been my own harshest critic. It took me years of unraveling my own chronic pain personality type to realize that in some areas of my life, being a Type T serves me very well (aka my career & organizing a household/ motherhood). Yet, in many other aspects of my life (my relationship with my Self, & relationships with family & friends), being a Type T causes more harm than good.

In going through my own chronic pain self-healing journey, I've learned how to 'turn up' or 'turn down' the volume on my Type T personality traits, depending on the context in which I am operating. This has helped immensely with moving through my own pain story, all without sacrificing the parts of me that make me great! Now I help other folks like me to do the same, which is beyond rewarding!!!

SO....

I'm very curious! For all you other 'Type T' folks out there...

What do you do for a living?

Have your Type T personality traits (perfectionism, people pleasing, & desire to be high-achieving) BENEFITTED you in some aspects of your life?

I'm intrigued to hear your responses. :)

Sending well-wishes,
Alex Ross
 
I have changed careers a couple of times. But I started as a visual artist. Unfortunately I developed a lot of trauma at my first professional job as a lead designer. I worked for a verbally and mentally abusive boss. My work was never enough. In fact in the 5 years I was employed at that job I don’t recall her complimenting my work, except I was kept around and beaten up which years down the road led me to believe there was something she was projecting onto me. I developed perfectionist tendencies. Rechecking my work. Making sure things looked perfect. It never felt enough.

Right before the pandemic took over, I switched careers into the IT world. I work alongside some very intelligent people who help our nation’s veterans. Unfortunately at first I took some of those toxic tendencies from my last job. I began fearing female managers even though my work was praised. This felt very confusing to me because the one thing I took away from my last job/toxic manager is I was stupid and my work was never enough. It took me a couple years to feel safe enough in the environment, and to actually realize that hey, I’m actually very good at my job and I do good work, and all the things my last boss beat me up verbally over were completely false.

I wouldn’t say I’m high achieving but my last job had certainly instilled a fear of people not thinking I’m good enough so I try to do the best I can so people think otherwise, being helpful and kind, etc. Sure it’s led to promotions and praise and it still sometimes surprises me to this day.

However with doing the TMS work this whole year I am finally coming to realize and truly deeply believe that I am good enough.

Thanks for this thought provoking topic. I feel like this was very therapeutic for me like journaling.
 
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I’m a journalist and copywriter. But you know what, I think you could do any job with TMS traits and it could be bad for you. It’s the traits, not the job that does you in, I suppose. Although, journalism has a high stress level built in (especially with daily deadlines) and I’m pretty sure I was attracted to the Adrenaline rush from it.

HealingMe said:
I began fearing female managers
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@HealingMe
Don’t get me started! Women bosses have been the bane of my existence. I feel like I was constantly maneuvering to survive them throughout my whole career. And it was so easy for me to rapidly lose self confidence under the thumb of the evil ones. Looking back now, it’s easier to see that they all had low self esteem themselves and were trying to make themselves feel better by putting me down. They also could sense I was an easy target, because of my people pleasing and other traits.

It’s sad. I guess it also happens with men bosses, but I hate to say they seemed to possess maybe a little more sense of being empowered and didn’t need to put someone else down. It was uncanny how it was older women who were the tough ones for me. The more you grow from your TMS journey (which is ultimately a journey of mental health), the less of a target you will be because they will sense your strength.

In one of her books, Claire Weekes says to combat stressful bosses by owning your work. Do it for your own purpose. Don’t let other people take that away from you. I guess she recognizes the anxiety these situations can create. It’s in Freedom From Nervous Suffering (Ch. 5 of the audio book). I love this book!
 
Diana-M said:
I’m a journalist and copywriter. But you know what, I think you could do any job with TMS traits and it could be bad for you. It’s the traits, not the job that does you in, I suppose. Although, journalism has a high stress level built in (especially with daily deadlines) and I’m pretty sure I was attracted to the Adrenaline rush from it.


@HealingMe
Don’t get me started! Women bosses have been the bane of my existence. I feel like I was constantly maneuvering to survive them throughout my whole career. And it was so easy for me to rapidly lose self confidence under the thumb of the evil ones. Looking back now, it’s easier to see that they all had low self esteem themselves and were trying to make themselves feel better by putting me down. They also could sense I was an easy target, because of my people pleasing and other traits.

It’s sad. I guess it also happens with men bosses, but I hate to say they seemed to possess maybe a little more sense of being empowered and didn’t need to put someone else down. It was uncanny how it was older women who were the tough ones for me. The more you grow from your TMS journey (which is ultimately a journey of mental health), the less of a target you will be because they will sense your strength.

In one of her books, Claire Weekes says to combat stressful bosses by owning your work. Do it for your own purpose. Don’t let other people take that away from you. I guess she recognizes the anxiety these situations can create. It’s in Freedom From Nervous Suffering (Ch. 5 of the audio book). I love this book!
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Yes, I do believe my old boss had a low self esteem. You bring up a good point.

My perception of female managers definitely shifted once I had a little more experience in my current job. My current manager is very supportive and very kind to me. I feel very lucky now.

I will have to read Freedom From Nervous Suffering. It sounds very interesting.
 
alexross_pa_bloom said:
Have your Type T personality traits (perfectionism, people pleasing, & desire to be high-achieving) BENEFITTED you in some aspects of your life?
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Hi Alex, and welcome.

Jan A the retired CPA here. My type T traits certainly benefited my career as a public accountant, most of it running my own tax practice. I had many clients who appreciated the attention to detail and especially the personal service I brought to my work and my relationships with them. That being said, I quickly learned where to draw the line, as I realized that I was good enough to make the rules and to put my foot down, say No, or even show someone the door if necessary to maintain my equanimity and self-respect. I had many friends in the profession, and watched too many of them let clients call the shots, apply unreasonable pressure, and treat them unprofessionally. I figured there was no point in running my own business if I couldn't enjoy it!
 
Please don't hate on female bosses! When I was young I thought I would like male bosses better. Then I had the greatest boss and she was female. Energetic, enthusiastic, motivating. Then I became a female boss myself. :)
 
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