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TMS Symptoms Sadness and Grief instead of rage and anger?

Discussion in 'General Discussion Subforum' started by sev1988, Mar 1, 2017.

  1. sev1988

    sev1988 New Member

    Can TMS symptoms be caused by deeply buried sadness and grief instead of rage in anger? My grandmother died 10 years ago and I've never finished grieving for her. My very first TMS symptom, started the after she died. This symptom involved burning nerve pain in my wrist and hands. Since then more symptoms have piled themselves on top of one another (my hyperacousis and arthritis.)
     
  2. FredAmir

    FredAmir Well known member

    Yes, certainly. When my dad died I felt a lot of grief but also a lot of angered surfaced. I did not have any physical symptoms but was surprised at all the anger.

    I had forgiven him completely in my heart, so I thought, for all the abuse I endured when growing up. As I matured more, I began to see him as a wounded child in the body of an old man. I used to hug him and give him the love he did not receive as a child.

    After he passed away I talked to a grief counselor who told me this was quite natural. I had forgiven my dad but not completely. So I did and that brought me a lot of relief.

    Even though you primarily feel sadness and grief, there might be some repressed anger, possibly toward yourself for not being the "perfect" grandchild. Or you could be really angry because you loved her so much and she is not with you anymore. Or it could simply be that is how your body is reacting to grief. Regardless, what is important is that you know it is TMS and you can take steps to counter it and recover.

    My sincere condolences for your loss.
     
    Durga and MWsunin12 like this.
  3. Steve Ozanich

    Steve Ozanich TMS Consultant

    Sadness and grief cause rage and anger. You can parse the emotions down into any category, flavor or shade you want, but there are really only two categories of emotions; good ones and bad ones. They each exist upon the other.

    I worked with a lady years ago who had 20 of her friends die. Once I got her into grief counseling she healed. She learned in the process that she was deeply enraged at the loss of her loved ones.

    So the type of emotion doesn't matter. If you lost someone you loved then you are deeply angry.

    SO
     
    MWsunin12 likes this.
  4. JanAtheCPA

    JanAtheCPA Beloved Grand Eagle

    Sev, when I experienced two losses in a row in 2012, it was thanks to the things I learned doing this work, that helped me realize that my grief was actually the deep emotion of abandonment. I think that our primitive brains repress this emotion, because it feels selfish. It's the loved one who has lost their life, they are the one that suffered - and for ME to feel abandoned feels terribly selfish.

    Add to that the rage that we all experience at the unfairness of death and of our knowledge of death.

    Acknowledging that rage, and especially acknowledging and allowing myself to experience the depth of my abandonment, freed me to grieve, oddly, in a much more satisfying and conclusive way.
     
    Ellen likes this.
  5. FredAmir

    FredAmir Well known member

    A good friend of mine died suddenly due to a heart attack. It was a devastating shock. I felt overwhelmed and heart broken. So I felt dizzy (overwhelmed) and was having chest pains (heart broken). I did call my doctor and agreed with me that it was a stress response.

    I do want to share here a blogpost I wrote on heart attacks. As is the case with back pain, not all tests and treatments useful.

    http://www.fredamir.com/single-post/2016/07/11/Heart-Attack-Avoid-Angiogram-Angioplasty-and-Bypass-Surgery (Back Pain Workshop)
     
  6. EricFeelsThisWay

    EricFeelsThisWay Peer Supporter

    I definitely do believe repressed sadness and grief can be the source of TMS symptoms. But also bear in mind that it's rare to experience grief without some shade of anger. And everyone gets angry in different ways. Societally expected forms of anger like yelling and violence don't apply to everyone. You can also be resentful, spiteful, indignant, or experience a quiet festering. I would recommend to get in touch with your own unique kind of anger and how you express it.
     
    Durga likes this.

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