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Alan has completed the new Pain Recovery Program. To read or share it, use this updated link: https://www.tmswiki.org/forum/painrecovery/
TMS lists
- Thread starter Mani
- Start date
JanAtheCPA
Beloved Grand Eagle
That's a smart question. I do think it's ill-advised, because that's exactly why the TMS brain gives you symptoms - so that you will stress about them instead of examining the things that are emotionally more difficult and uncomfortable to face.
How about the things in your life which are different/hard/not ideal/etc. because of the symptoms. Housing, work, exercise, activities, friends, dating - I know you have thoughts about some or all these things. The only advice I would give is to only say "my TMS" to refer to any of your symptoms. (A big reason we still use the TMS acronym, even though it's a bit out of date amongst many practitioners, is that it's so convenient and it covers ALL the symptoms, and everyone on this forum knows exactly what we're referring to).
How about the things in your life which are different/hard/not ideal/etc. because of the symptoms. Housing, work, exercise, activities, friends, dating - I know you have thoughts about some or all these things. The only advice I would give is to only say "my TMS" to refer to any of your symptoms. (A big reason we still use the TMS acronym, even though it's a bit out of date amongst many practitioners, is that it's so convenient and it covers ALL the symptoms, and everyone on this forum knows exactly what we're referring to).
Mani
Well known member
Mani
Well known member
Thanks Joule,
I am no longer able to speak; imagine how long that list is
. Its a great topic to journal about cause when i sit down and think about it im incredibly frustrated about a whole lot of things. I just thought about things that I do that are stressors, but for me the stressors are to not be able to do something -- which is basically everything.Maybe to ask you and others: do you think those things are actually frustrating? Humans are really flexible. Say if I were to become blind or whatever, would that be frustrating eternally, or do you adapt and it stops frustrating you?
I could imagine coping with these difficult circumstances you kind of start creating exactly the things TMS are; just coping mechanisms to protect you.
Its kind of philosophical i guess but i would love to hear your thoughts
Joulegirl
Beloved Grand Eagle
I have no idea if my answer is right-but it's how I think about it.
For me, I could not recognize anger and rage. That when one of the forum members told me to look at what annoys me and what frustrates me well, that list was a mile long! I had learned long ago that anger was bad. I was taught that anger meant you were out of control and that you couldn't express it by any means. It was not safe so I downgraded anger/rage into something that was safe. Unfortunately for me, that meant I was downgrading/repressing my emotions and I was also rationalizing other people's behavior instead of holding them accountable.
You may not turn your anger into other things. I did it to cope and clearly that didn't work out so well as I am here! But that advice helped me to look at things differently when I was starting to look at anger/rage and stressors currently in my life.
As you go through the SEP you will learn more about how TMS works. These are a lot of good questions, but I'm not sure I have the right answers-just ones that worked for me!
For me, I could not recognize anger and rage. That when one of the forum members told me to look at what annoys me and what frustrates me well, that list was a mile long! I had learned long ago that anger was bad. I was taught that anger meant you were out of control and that you couldn't express it by any means. It was not safe so I downgraded anger/rage into something that was safe. Unfortunately for me, that meant I was downgrading/repressing my emotions and I was also rationalizing other people's behavior instead of holding them accountable.
You may not turn your anger into other things. I did it to cope and clearly that didn't work out so well as I am here! But that advice helped me to look at things differently when I was starting to look at anger/rage and stressors currently in my life.
I generally feel frustration and when I do I don't try to decipher it. To me, it's frustration if I feel myself getting agitated. I know the feeling in my body now. So that will be up to you to learn how your body reacts.
As you go through the SEP you will learn more about how TMS works. These are a lot of good questions, but I'm not sure I have the right answers-just ones that worked for me!
Cactusflower
Beloved Grand Eagle
It's far less about the symptoms themselves and more about the situation they place you in.
Write about how you feel to have to become more vulnerable and uncover hard truths. That means not just writing the story about the truths, but the situation you have been placed in.
What about the future. I know you are young. Write about your hopes and dreams or your lack of them. Write about how you feel you can fulfill those at this time.
Write about any of the beliefs you have uncovered, or are developing. You are at the age where you are beginning to solidify your belief system and that encompasses many things in life. Your beliefs in compassion, fairness, equality, money, work or at least your place within this planet, things you enjoy - (yes! You can write about the things you love and how they make you feel). Eg. you wrote that you love babies - write about what babies signify for you. You might even try writing a little story or song or even a letter to yourself when you were a baby: all the things you would hope for that tiny little being.
Write about the things you used to enjoy as a smaller child vs. the way you developed current interests of any kind: music, sport, intellect, arts, outdoors - whatever that is and where you are at with all that now. How much are you actually enjoying yourself and life at this moment - write about it!
Write about how your symptoms are "holding you back" or "changing your life" at this time and how you feel about it. Don't write about the actual physical symptoms but focus on how it is impacting your life - social life, family life independence vs. dependence (which I think might be a big one for you re: your need for parental comfort before sleeping).
Write about the process you are going through from childhood to adulthood in your personal experience. Your thoughts, your struggles and your expectations for both yourself and others.
There is a LOT you can write about surrounding symptoms without actually writing about them.
Write about how you feel to have to become more vulnerable and uncover hard truths. That means not just writing the story about the truths, but the situation you have been placed in.
What about the future. I know you are young. Write about your hopes and dreams or your lack of them. Write about how you feel you can fulfill those at this time.
Write about any of the beliefs you have uncovered, or are developing. You are at the age where you are beginning to solidify your belief system and that encompasses many things in life. Your beliefs in compassion, fairness, equality, money, work or at least your place within this planet, things you enjoy - (yes! You can write about the things you love and how they make you feel). Eg. you wrote that you love babies - write about what babies signify for you. You might even try writing a little story or song or even a letter to yourself when you were a baby: all the things you would hope for that tiny little being.
Write about the things you used to enjoy as a smaller child vs. the way you developed current interests of any kind: music, sport, intellect, arts, outdoors - whatever that is and where you are at with all that now. How much are you actually enjoying yourself and life at this moment - write about it!
Write about how your symptoms are "holding you back" or "changing your life" at this time and how you feel about it. Don't write about the actual physical symptoms but focus on how it is impacting your life - social life, family life independence vs. dependence (which I think might be a big one for you re: your need for parental comfort before sleeping).
Write about the process you are going through from childhood to adulthood in your personal experience. Your thoughts, your struggles and your expectations for both yourself and others.
There is a LOT you can write about surrounding symptoms without actually writing about them.