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TMS is lovlier the second..third..fouth time around

P

phillyjoe

Peer Supporter
I have been quiet for a long time but needed to share that as I approach my one year anniversary of knee surgery I fianlly worked up the courage and confidence to play hoops for the first time in 18 months. So I played and although I remain slow and can't jump, the knee felt fine. While showering my TMS brain said "glad to see your knee feels fine, remember your back?" and I became stiff as a.. So my questions are, did I set myself up by trying to be overy confident that I would not damage my knee? Why would my TMS brain cause me to revert to the back issue? Should I have used less positive self talk preparing myself to play hoops? Here is the real interesting development. I told myself after the shower, "TMS, you are so tricky" and just tried to not become anxious or over think the situation. I worked, later mowed the lawn, went to bed and woke up feeing like nothing happen. I had this "aha" moment I have heard and read about for years, I even thought, now I can become a TMS therapist, then by the time I drove to work (about 30 minutes) I was stiff all over again, BUT the knee feels great. I kind of feel like an idiot that I'm missing something. Thanks fopr listening. Go Penn State.
 
You're making great progress. When you play hoops or do other exercise or mow the lawn, etc.,
try not to think about maybe you'll feel pain. Thinking you may get pain can bring it on.
Focus on the activity you are doing... Live in the present moment. Thinking about pain puts you
in the future.
 
Walt Oleksy said:
You're making great progress. When you play hoops or do other exercise or mow the lawn, etc.,
try not to think about maybe you'll feel pain. Thinking you may get pain can bring it on.
Focus on the activity you are doing... Live in the present moment. Thinking about pain puts you
in the future.
Click to expand...
 
PJ, don't OVERTHINK it, TMS is not rocket science. The Good Doc's theory is beautifully simple, we're the ones who over complicate it.

G'luck!
tt
 
Heya, PhillyJoe, that sounds like classic TMS to me. I think you're on the right track.

Here's my take: the self talk that you did worked wonderfully and helped you with your knee. There are always ups and downs with any area, so take solace in the way that your knee did so well. What makes this a classic case is that as soon as you had success with one area, another area flared up. We see this all of the time on the forums - once people have some success it is like their brains panic and create a new symptom. Worse, the new symptom that pops up tends to be one that really gets under people's skin and scares them. "This time it's different!" is what your TMS wants to tell you.

The key thing to remember is to stay the course, because this sounds completely normal to me. It might not feel normal, but, as Abraham Low wrote, "facts aren't feelings." You body probably just isn't used to all the work and is probably just a little sore. That's great. I assume you've already been checked out by a doctor, so just stay the course and try to enjoy the ride! Chances are the road will be rough, but the view is great. My grandmother spent her last years in State College and my sister in law and her fiancee went there. Go Penn State!
 
phillyjoe said:
Thanks Walt. that I get. But where did the back stiffness come from when I was concerned about knee pain?
Click to expand...
Hi Joe,
As other people tell you above, that's how exactly TMS works! Even though I already overcame major TMS pain on my knees, ankle, and elbows, pain comes and goes time to time. I was worried everytime that happened, but thanks to this forum's help I'm getting to the state where I don't care if it's there or not. Having no pain at all is good for sure, but the greatest success is not caring whatever since there is nothing wrong anyway. This epiphany is teaching me a lot of life lessons recently.

As soon as I focus on "why"s, the pain cycle just feeds itself. I'm a very logical and anxious person who always needs a clear answer that I can logically understand and accept, otherwise I get uncomfortable and worried. I figured this personality of mine was the best gummy bears for my TMS brain. This logical thinking helped me as a perfectionist banker in my career but never as a healthy, confident, nonchalant person--how can a brain and TMS work perfectly logically when even economics and financial market does not many times? Logic, answers... they are not the ones for us to expect from TMS. How we react and live our lives happily is the thing!
 
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Thank YOU, everyone!
I still have popping anxiety and 'logical thinking' on the pain when the pain comes up so randomly and continues longer than expected, as my recent posts show. But the recent discovery from my family confirmed the teachings and guidance I learned in this forum.

Although the superficial situation (that I still feel pain here and there and new TMS symptoms also linger) has not been fully resolved, I know there is nothing wrong with me and I deserve a happy active life. This feeds my confidence and self-esteem more and more. I have much more way to go, since I'm still quite an anxious one, but I'm sure I'll do better and better. And I need is a full support through it, which I'm receiving a lot from this forum :)
 
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Appreciate the thoughts. The concrete, objective part of me is always looking for the abc type answer. I think (there I go again over thinking) is part of the reason I remain stuck at times in my anxiety symptoms then when I get a back attack I go into how did this happen mode. Especially in this particular case where I was so focused on my knee. The funny thing is, I wish the knee had hurt instead. That's the beauty or mystery of TMS.
 
Dear Phina, WOW! do you get it! I can't recall anyone in my many years of posting at the two TMS boards making such a rapid transformation from all symptom talk (crutches, cushions, wrist supports, ,injured butts, sitting doing damage, etc., etc., etc., etc.--to thinking, talking, and JOURNAL SPEAKING as Nicole Sach's coined phrase. I'm heartened to have had a hand in your TMS thinking transformation. Don't forget, it took you MINDBODY a long time to develop the conditioned patterns creating your psychosomatic pain. From an existential view it starts in the womb (the Mozart effect) and karmically to/from infinity. So be PATIENT with yourself taking back control of your destiny from the inner-gremlin who is still trying to PROTECT you from yourselves. Rejoice in your rapid strides, feel them in the now, as they say-- and, can I have a low interest loan--or a toaster?

Cheers,
tt, lsmft
 
Hi, Phillyjoe. You are definitely getting it.

Do what you think you can't do, and you can do it!

I love a quote from Eleanor Roosevelt I heard last night in the Ken Burns tv series
on The Roosevelts. During the dark days of World War II she said,
"Courage is more exhilarating than fear."

And, of course, FDR said, "There is nothing to fear but fear itself."

Onward with TMS believing and healing!
 
LOL, PJ - we do get distracted, don't we? You are clearly getting it - all you need to do is relax and not overthink it, as both you and Tennis Tom said.

I don't believe that TMS is something that can be cured. It's not just part of the human condition, it's wired in to our primitive brains, although clearly not very useful in our modern world. So it will keep coming up for the rest of your life. You'll get new symptoms, and when those don't work to distract you, your brain will attempt to go back to the old conditioned symptoms.

The difference now is that you know what it is when a symptom does appear, and you can dismiss it. This will become easier and quicker over time. For a personal example, you can read the success story I recently posted. The story is not only an example of being able to dismiss a symptom quickly, but also that you don't always have to dig deep to find the trigger behind the symptom.

~Jan
 
phillyjoe said:
...While showering my TMS brain said "glad to see your knee feels fine, remember your back?" and I became stiff as a..

You hadn't used those "muscles for a long time, it's natural for them to feel sore. But as a TMS'er your sub-c has conditioned you to interpret soreness for injury. That's why TMS docs dx by palpating the TMS "tender spots", TMS'ers are hyper sensitive to these.

...So my questions are, did I set myself up by trying to be overly confident that I would not damage my knee?

Dunno' maybe, the sub-c works in weird ways, you may have needed a new distraction, the symptom imperative.

...Why would my TMS brain cause me to revert to the back issue?

Symptom imperative?

...Should I have used less positive self talk preparing myself to play hoops?

Ya, maybe you were focused on your physical symptoms and not the emotional, playing ball should have been a positive distraction taking you away from worry, but your sub-c fear of doing damage over-rided that. Maybe it feels you don't deserve to be happy.

...then by the time I drove to work (about 30 minutes) I was stiff all over again, BUT the knee feels great. I kind of feel like an idiot that I'm missing something.

Your sub-c doesn't like going to work--who does? Your work place brings about TMS emotional issues, maybe you need a vacation, a new job or retirement? Feeling like an "idiot" would be "the universal inferiority complex" shared by TMS'ers--it's mostly ass-holes or the transcended who don't have it, you are not alone.
Click to expand...

Boiler-plate: This is all conjecture on my part, I am not licensed to think, I'm only a tennis player, and I haven't had my second cup of coffee.

Joe, call me if you like if you still have my #, pm if you don't.
 
TT: I have lost your number and I would like to talk I'm not a techie guy so pm? But thank you for breaking down my questions. Helpful.
 
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