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Tips for feeling the anger?

Discussion in 'General Discussion Subforum' started by vvill, Mar 14, 2018.

  1. vvill

    vvill New Member

    I’m having a great deal of trouble actually feeling these repressed feelings because my defences are very strong mentally and are essentially not allowing me to. Does anyone have any tips that can help me get in touch with these represssed thoughts and feelings?

    Thank you
  2. BruceMC

    BruceMC Beloved Grand Eagle

    I noticed this morning at the witching hour around 4:30 am that I felt my inner rage manifesting as sciatic pain along the outside of my lower left leg. It was just at the moment that my anger at the guy who bought my late parents' house this summer burst out in my mind.

    Maybe you should try accessing your repressed feelings at a time of day when your unconscious thought processes are more accessible? Mornings when you first wake up, evenings when you're going to go to bed, or during the night when dream states are closest to the surface.
    andy64tms likes this.
  3. vvill

    vvill New Member

    Okay, I’ll remember that. But how do you access them?
    andy64tms likes this.
  4. Andy Bayliss

    Andy Bayliss TMS Coach & Beloved Grand Eagle

    Here is a daily practice for you:
    Write out this sentence, copy many times on a page of paper

    "Right now I am angry about ___________________________."

    Use this by filling in the blank quickly with whatever comes to mind, at least 5 times in a row, without judging your responses. This is "inquiry" which means we're allowing ourselves to be surprised.

    Then sense into your body and notice the feeling of anger inside you: the texture, size, location, etc. Take some gentle breaths allowing the feeling to be there or change as it wants to.

    Then you might write out more about one of your responses which seems to have some importance in your life, sensing into your body occasionally as you write.

    Also, notice superego (Inner Critic) activity which might make you "wrong" for your feelings of anger. This is important to allow more consciousness of your anger to grow.
    andy64tms likes this.
  5. Mary80

    Mary80 Peer Supporter

    -ISTDP model? a Short-term Dynamic Psychotherapy
    the procedure is described in "unlearn your pain" by H.Shubiner , you can do it with a therapist but in the book the procedure is explained and the author writes that you can do it alone or with a friend.

    - writing exercises
    andy64tms likes this.
  6. vvill

    vvill New Member

    I’ll try it, I think the superego is very powerful and can be hard to deal with. Is there any that don’t involve writing, and can you vouch for this working? Have you actually been cured using these TMS techniques?
    andy64tms likes this.
  7. Mary80

    Mary80 Peer Supporter

    if you bother a dog you're sure it reacts ... try to find your anger you're sure it will come out
  8. andy64tms

    andy64tms Well known member

    Hi VVill,


    I wrote this thread back a while, initially it was for one repressed emotion. I added the other three stories later. My discovery was that we often repress emotions of all kinds. This seems to be for a variety of reasons. Here are some.

    We don’t have time to understand fully as in the ‘Anxiety repression story’.

    We fear what was said or encountered as in the first story about my ‘Blood Pressure’

    Often the emotion accumulates over time as in the ‘Windsurfing Story’

    The last story ‘Dangerous Emotion’ shows how my unawareness regarding my declining vision nearly caused an accident in Beverly Hills while driving. An emotion wasn’t repressed, maybe someone could tell me what emotion it was, perhaps stubbornness.

    Writing small stories does help reveal and access what’s going on in your head, give it a try.

    Good Luck
  9. andy64tms

    andy64tms Well known member

    I am curious does your name VVill mean you are Very Very Ill?:)

    If you don't want to write you could do what I call bullets and one line statements , but to write is to reveal, as you write a story your thought process reveals those hidden issues. Perhaps you not wanting to write is a form of repression in itself, TMS is most devious.

    "Have you actually been cured using these TMS techniques?"

    Not exactly cured, but you become emotionally content. What happened to me when I wrote "One Repressed Emotion" I understood the process.
    Last edited: Mar 15, 2018
  10. Celestialstar

    Celestialstar New Member

    I like this. I take it a step further- I write a stream of consciousness letter to the person, thing or situation I am angry at. Sometimes I write it to my subconscious even.

    I do not censor myself at all. I type it out ( I type much faster than I write freehand) and just let it all roll, curse words, selfishness, unfairness and all. I typically find the anger once I start typing and use phrases like "you made me feel...' and 'what you don't know is...' and things of that nature. Accusatory statements- the ones we DARE not make but likely feel inside. Write it all out and then read it aloud and then delete it. Let it go. Close the door on the conversation for that day on your terms- by pressing delete. It feels amazing.

    I think the inner child gets really pissed off with 'red tape circumstance' and we have to swallow it down because it's 'logical' and 'fair' and 'thoughtful to others.' I believe in all of the latter but I also believe that we have to deal with our own emotions ... somehow... and we can't just unleash on everyone we see at the moment we feel like it.

    Try this - see if it doesn't help you connect.
    andy64tms likes this.
  11. vvill

    vvill New Member

    I have written a lot and it hasn't worked much, I think where I'm expecting it to do something and it doesn't so I got a bit fed up with writing after a couple years. And vvill is just meant to be will but will's always taken. So I'm a bit reluctant to write because I'm starting to see it as a waste of time as it hasn't worked having done it for so long.
    andy64tms likes this.
  12. Celestialstar

    Celestialstar New Member

    Interested to know this too. My TMS started with illness which makes for a difficult situation because it's hard to know where to put your anger. I did not feel anger at all because of it. Whose fault is it anyway? It falls under the category of 'these things happen' and, as I said above, I think all of that is red tape circumstance. Illness terrified me, it did not anger me, and therefore I did not realize any anger- it was buried WAY down deep below grief and I am still working on it myself.
    andy64tms likes this.
  13. Celestialstar

    Celestialstar New Member

    Are you journaling or writing a "dear bob' type of letter? The former didn't work for me but the latter did. Very different.
    andy64tms likes this.
  14. andy64tms

    andy64tms Well known member

    Hi VVill

    Well done Celestial star for hanging in here I went back to bed with my cudely wife and got warm.:) Celestial you make good points for someone so new. Your comments nudged my thinking to my next question which is:

    VVill do you like any form of writing? OR

    Is your aversion to writing only about suppressed emotions?

    I did what AndyB offered; it helped because it was speedy which allowed thoughts to come. I noticed I was reluctant to write speedily coming from a background of mechanical drawing where every detail is important. The other aspect was it was hand written and untidy thus going against my accurate nature, printing on my mechanical drawings had to be exact. So you see all our comments and writing have released thoughts and emotions.

    I think you are at a disadvantage without some form of expressive writing. How about writing a a little more information on your home page, help the people that are helping you?

    Good luck
    Last edited: Mar 15, 2018

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