Hai guys! Something that came up last week that I wanted to share was my realization that ever since I came back around to TMS in relation to my acne, I've become pretty obsessed with doing X for the *sake* of healing. More specifically, I could feel pretty strongly that part of my healing will involve being around people more / not being so nervous to show my true self to others (a self separate from the "pretty fit chick" I was previously only comfortable showing). As I previously mentioned, the month I really dove into e.d. recovery (absolutely terrifying for me) is the month my acne started. To speak symbolically, I believe my acne surfaced in part to hide / protect me - quite literally - because I was finally surrendering the mask I had been hiding behind all those years and attempting to really step into an authentic version of myself. Ok so upon making several realizations and connections like this, I started viewing everything I did through the lens of healing- almost trying to manipulate the way I lived in order to facilitate the most potential for fast-paced healing as possible. I get that a big part of the healing process IS doing the things we have been scared to do due to symptoms (so for me, simply being around people more despite the status of my skin), but I realized I was starting to live in an overly-obsessed way; almost trying to FORCE healing to occur and then becoming hopelessly frustrated with the slowness of it all. When talking about this all with my husband he suggested I take some pressure off; to stop trying to MAKE healing happen and simply go out and live my best life (still despite the status of my skin) because doing so will simply give me the best life- regardless of whether it speeds up healing or not. In other words, "thrive to thrive," not JUST "thrive to heal." Can anyone else relate to this?? I think I've felt frustrated / like I have to be more forceful or something because my back / hip / knee pain practically healed overnight after learning about TMS, but my acne has not. Def feeling like I need to stop focusing on making healing happen and instead focusing on being my best self, living my best life, and trust in the process of healing to consequently unfold in its own time.