Discussion in 'Mindbody Video Library' started by Forest, Apr 30, 2014.
This is excellent Forest. Like many TMSers I've have been "noceboed" within an inch my life by well meaning doctors. I was once told when being given a new medication "In all likelyhood you will get a lot worse before you start to improve, and even then it may not work for you". How helpful was that ??!!
I hear you. It can be tough, though, because sometimes you want to prepare someone for bad news. So how do you do that without noceboing them? (I think we've coined a new verb. If a third person uses it, we'll have to contact a dictionary.)
Jerome Groopman, author of "A Knife in the Back" (about back surgery) has a book about the challenge for doctors of giving bad news in a way that is both realistic and hope inspiring. He is a cancer doc, so he very often has to lay it on the line in a way that is both honest and compassionate. He says that there are no easy answers.
I struggled with this the other day when I called a pair of TMSers, to hear their stories and share my own. Both of them were just starting their journeys, and I wanted to let them know that there would be ups and downs and that that was okay. Basically, I wanted to give them a little outcome independence by inoculate them against the inevitable ups and downs that they would face on the path to healing.
What do others think? When you are speaking with someone who is just learning about TMS, do you let them know that there will be ups and downs? If they know that they ups and downs are coming and that they are normal, then maybe they can face them with greater equanimity and have an easier time of it. On the other hand, you don't want to nocebo them. I'm not sure, but in both cases, I held my tongue. The time to learn that lesson is probably later.
I always mention the ups and downs, but emphasize that it is all part of the healing process so not to pay it undo attention. I then add that in my experience when I emerged from a "down" spell, my healing had usually progressed to a higher level, so I ended up feeling better than I was before.
Without hope there can be no healing.
I like to say that there are people who just read a TMS book and are healed--to put the possibility out there. But then I say that for many of us it takes more time and work and there are often ups and downs along the way.
Well said, both. Thanks for the tips. I guess that it just comes down to how you say it.
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