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Stuck! Help, please!

Discussion in 'Support Subforum' started by Dahlia, Jan 24, 2014.

  1. Dahlia

    Dahlia Well known member

    I discovered Dr. Sarno last November and soon after got huge relief from TMS. I have worked the the SEP and the psychological program on this site.

    Since then, progress has been up and down but general trend had been better. Now, last couple of weeks, lots of MBS of all kinds all over the place. I know I need to do something different, but not sure what to pick up first.

    I'm not sure that just re-re-reading Dr. Sarno books is enough. I could journal more, but not sure what to tackle at this point. I am already working through the Power of Now. Also, I just printed out the comments Balto posted that were written by Ace, and I will review and apply that.

    What do you think I should do next? I can't do everything at once so what more thing should I add: is there another book or program written by someone other than Dr. Sarno that would be a good next step? I know that there are several to chose from but I'd like a recommendation for which to pick.

    Thanks for your help.

    P.S. I think I have a lot of RAGE toward my MBS. I thought I had it on the ropes.:mad:
  2. Ellen

    Ellen Beloved Grand Eagle

    Hi Dahlia,

    I think sometimes it's best to just let what we've already learned kind of seep in and settle. At least, that has been the case for me. Also, rather than adding new things, try doing the old things differently--like using a different format for journaling, such as dialogues between different parts of yourself if you haven't tried that yet. Perhaps a dialogue between the 'you that is aware of your rage' and the 'you that is raging'? What can they learn from each other? Are you including some mindfulness meditation practices? They are invaluable to me.

    But just taking a little time off can work too, as long as you use the time to enjoy life and be good to yourself.
  3. Dahlia

    Dahlia Well known member

    Good advice, Ellen. Thanks for your response.
  4. Walt Oleksy (RIP 2021)

    Walt Oleksy (RIP 2021) Beloved Grand Eagle

    I couldn't give you better advice than Ellen.
    If you do try more journaling, it looks to me like the focus should be on the rage you
    have for your MBS. What started all that?
  5. Dahlia

    Dahlia Well known member

    Hi Walt:
    I guess I got angry at having almost 60 years of suffering due to MBS. It started with asthma when I was about 5 and has been one thing or another until now.

    I know that if I look at negatively, it feels like a waste: that my body was fighting me and making everything more difficult for me and now I find out it was "needless" suffering and now that I know it can go away, it won't?! I get angry at it as though it were something separate from me, imposing this incredibly unfair sentence on my life, for what? for trying to be good?! How perverse is that?

    In the light of the new day, I realize that there is another way to see this: everyone has suffering and for many it is much much worse. Plus I have gotten to live this long and have a chance to learn and grow from this suffering. Many other don't even get to live to my age. Many don't ever grow psychologically or spiritually (that does take some courage, doesn't it?), and I have that opportunity. I guess I have developed courage as a result as well.

    Plus I have the opportunity of some years (I hope!) less pain and more joy of living. So I am blessed.

    Yesterday I was just feeling overwhelmed with sadness. Some days the sadness becomes like a strong gravity, pulling me in.

    Thanks for being there.
  6. North Star

    North Star Beloved Grand Eagle

    Oh Dahlia, I so understand. I'm nearly 50 and I've had rounds of anger to deal with…resentment at seeing others go off and lead vibrant lives (or so from my perspective), while I've stayed home hurting or seeing doctors. NO MORE!

    When I have the days of sadness I turn to my happy music and exercise. Of late, the "Piano Guys" really fill the bill for me. Especially their Youtube videos. I'm always surprised at the power of music to pull me out of the heaviest of funks. Yes, somedays it is more persistent. But I am learning to remind myself that this too shall pass. Spring will come. It won't always be January.

    I think the suffering we've gone through DOES deepen one's character and understanding and this is of immeasurable worth. I look at the preoccupations of so many people and it all just rings hollow with me. I mean - God bless 'em - I'd just rather connect on heart level with people. Conversations that matter with with people who care. :)

    I hope you're having a better day today.
    nancy, Ellen and Dahlia like this.
  7. Dahlia

    Dahlia Well known member

    Your empathy has touched my heart and brought tears to my eyes. It is good to know one is not alone. Thank you. And, yes, I am having a better day today.

    Thanks also for the reminder about music: it has such a strong power for me. I will remember to use it more often: to calm, to find my peaceful center, to get energy and joy.

    You are right about these life challenges giving us insight into the deeper meaning of life and an appreciation for things that others, who are living "on the surface", do not see at all.

    Also, because we are meeting these challenges in creative and brave ways we are able to experience greater heights than we would have otherwise, do you agree? It does help to think of these as challenges and opportunities to be creative in meeting them.

    Wishing you peace and joy.
    Ellen likes this.
  8. North Star

    North Star Beloved Grand Eagle

    I am so glad I was able to encourage a little, Dahlia. You're not in this alone!

    And I absolutely agree, I believe we DO have a deeper appreciation for all that life brings. My appreciation for the smallest of things has brought me so much richness. From marveling over the symmetry of a flower, seeing acts of kindness or even…as in right now, my sweet cat nuzzling the back of my head.

    It even warms my heart when I hear Walt speak so affectionately of Annie, his faithful dog. It's amazing how good stuff like that just multiplies when it's shared.
    Ellen likes this.
  9. Walt Oleksy (RIP 2021)

    Walt Oleksy (RIP 2021) Beloved Grand Eagle

    Hi, Dahlia. I too lost years to pain before I learned about TMS last year when I was 82.
    I'm not feeling sorry for the lost years. I learned a lot during them and now I know how to
    handle anxiety, stress, and pain. The next 18 years to 100 are going to be great.
    Dahlia and North Star like this.
  10. Walt Oleksy (RIP 2021)

    Walt Oleksy (RIP 2021) Beloved Grand Eagle

    I sometimes think I overdo it talking about Annie so I'm glad it's okay and cheers you and hopefully others.
    It's not that I love her. I adore her.

  11. Mermaid

    Mermaid Well known member

    Hi Dahlia

    Sorry to hear you've having a bad spell. I've just had a one myself, so I know how disappointed and frustrated you must be feeling. I get mad at myself when I have a flare up, like I'm in some sort of competition! Just thank your body for the alarm call, and try not to be afraid of your symptoms. I just recently read a excellent TMS recovery book by Nicole J. Sachs, "The Meaning of Truth", you can get it on Amazon. It helped me enormously so perhaps you could give it a try.

    Much love & big hugs :)
    Dahlia likes this.
  12. North Star

    North Star Beloved Grand Eagle

    Walt, I never weary of Annie tales. :happy:
  13. Dahlia

    Dahlia Well known member

    Mermaid, thanks for the book recommendation. I'll check it out.

    Even more thanks for the hugs! Back atcha!

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