My personality trait of perfectionism makes me feel overwhelmed. I try to be as good as I can in everything I do. I don’t like to half a** projects or anything I do, whether it be at work or school or personal life, I don’t get a good sense of completion or satisfaction if I don’t put 100% of myself into it. I don’t feel as gratified or as fulfilled. I need to know I gave something everything I could. I have a strong desire to uphold my morals and character. I have a strong work ethic. I like to feel successful and accomplished. But I am learning that there are sacrifices to this type of trait. I often use it as a means to distract myself from underlying emotions or feelings that may be trying to resurface that may be unpleasant or uncomfortable. I admit that I have ignored my own needs by trying to be perfect in what I do…if I am so focused on a task or activity, I don’t have to think about what’s going on inside of me. That’s too much work first of all. And second of all, that could get messy and unpleasant. Who wants to deal with that? I am learning, though, to recognize hidden emotions and feelings, and to give them more attention. Self talk. Tell myself that I am ok and that I am safe. I grew up most of my childhood not feeling safe. I felt insecure, unsure, fearful and anxious. These feelings never fully left, and often there are triggers that bring them out again (social settings, new people, being put on the spot, speaking up, etc). I feel that if I perform things perfectly and well, then no one, not even myself, will notice my emotional insecurities.. I can hide them more easily.