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Day 12 Still working...

Irene

Irene

Peer Supporter
Greetings!

Back on SEP 9, after journaling for a while, I decided to google the person on my mind to see if she is still alive. She is, but I also found an obituary for her son. So, I decided to write a letter to her, after no contact for 20 years, and mail this one. I finished that just now, and will send it out tomorrow.

SEP 10 had a great article, but when I went to the writing, I took something from my lists and ran it through The Work, whose link I had found in a post somewhere on this site. Anyway, I've found that to be a great way to take a current stresser and play with it to see what's really going on, and how many other ways I might look at it, how many unexpected truths might be uncovered.

I used the same way to work on SEP11, after reading the articles. Personally, I found SEP12 to be rather weak, but having finished my difficult letter today, I'll consider SEP12 finished, and move on tomorrow to 13.

Thanks for reading!
 
Irene, you're doing great with the ESP program and how you do journaling.
Keep it flexible, comfortable.
Your friend is going to appreciate your letter very much, and I bet it did you good to write it.
Now be sure to mail it.

As Christmas approaches, I am reminding myself that it is not Santa's birthday
so my emphasis is spiritual, not gift-wrapped.
 
I have such a fear of rejection. I sent a letter to my step-daughters telling my story of what happened to me as a child. I heard nothing. It was very painful. It is the same Story listed for me on the TMSwiki. I heard nothing. Friends have sent me a response of "this is an amazing story." But I heard nothing from them.

I had to journal about my fear of rejection, my anger, my fear of disappointing them. Maybe I did not write it correctly (perfectionism). Maybe I should have written it differently. Maybe the timing was wrong. Maybe I should have never sent it. I replayed over and over and over my options.

But I was able to "manage" what felt like rejection from learning all the tools on the TMSwiki.
 
I mailed the letter today, Walt. So, it's on its way!

Stella, strangely, I felt peaceful mailing the letter, although, there are definitely rejection issues surrounding this person. Perhaps because of the death of her son, I feel emboldened. I can't explain all that here. But, on the other hand, it may have been easy to mail because the rest of my life is sooooo extremely stressful right now.

Ellen, I'm looking forward to using The Work for other people on my list. Actually, even just thinking about doing that challenges my thoughts about others. I like that!
 
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