It's day 17 of my SEP today. A few days after starting the SEP a glimpse of hope arose when I noticed a slight feeling of relaxation in my lower back. Unfortunately it was not persistent (maybe because I was thinking about my pain level and my healing progress too often). I must admit that I haven't really managed to realize the benefits of journaling so far. When I do my daily journaling It kind of reminds me of doing my homework at the times I went to school. After journaling I feel like "Yeah, I'm through with it for today." and sometimes "I wonder if that really served any purpose." I haven't experienced any supressed emotions being revealed by journaling yet. When reading other stories I sometimes think my worst childhood memories do not even come close to what other sufferers have experienced. Not in the least have I experienced something like abuse, divorce, serious illness or death of a close friend or family member. I think I have to focus more on the present than on the past. Another point that keeps my occupied: I haven't experienced emotionally driven flare-ups (at least I haven't recognized them as being emotionally driven). My pain level has been pretty steady for over 8 years now. The flare-ups I sometimes experience are always generated by action, e.g. sports, gardening, sleeping on an uncomfortable mattress. And to keep up my basic pain level it's enough to just sit or stand (while expecting that sitting or standing is painful). Is ist possible that my biggest problem is conditioning?