Im reading Tamaras book. Its amazing and im in chapter 5. Something ive struggled with and im hoping someone can answer this:
I am NOT a people pleaser, helper, over achiever or self critical but i am somewhat of a perfectionist, a procrastinator and worrier. Im also highly sensitive and get my feelings hurt easily and i also ruminate when i do. My 38 year marriage has been somewhat toxic with a lot of hurt feelings. Im trying to change my beliefs around my husband and ive made progress with this but its a work in progress. Im working on being over sensitive too. I also havent worked for 25 years so no stress there.
All this to say, did i have nervous system issues before, yes, and i had a bout of depression during peri menopause and years later, anxiety that led to my SSRI use. With all this im still not convinced that had i not had my butt kicked by withdrawal would i have ever become chronically ill. I was physically healthy before withdrawal and was in a good place mentally with the issue resolved that caused the anxiety when i started tapering off my medication.
i did not end up here organically by having a very stressful life and a history of childhood trauma. My TMS was triggered by a third party substance that directly affected my nervous system and threw it into dysregulation. Does this matter for recovery? Does it make it harder to recover? Ive struggled with this and hope someone can answer it.
I am NOT a people pleaser, helper, over achiever or self critical but i am somewhat of a perfectionist, a procrastinator and worrier. Im also highly sensitive and get my feelings hurt easily and i also ruminate when i do. My 38 year marriage has been somewhat toxic with a lot of hurt feelings. Im trying to change my beliefs around my husband and ive made progress with this but its a work in progress. Im working on being over sensitive too. I also havent worked for 25 years so no stress there.
All this to say, did i have nervous system issues before, yes, and i had a bout of depression during peri menopause and years later, anxiety that led to my SSRI use. With all this im still not convinced that had i not had my butt kicked by withdrawal would i have ever become chronically ill. I was physically healthy before withdrawal and was in a good place mentally with the issue resolved that caused the anxiety when i started tapering off my medication.
i did not end up here organically by having a very stressful life and a history of childhood trauma. My TMS was triggered by a third party substance that directly affected my nervous system and threw it into dysregulation. Does this matter for recovery? Does it make it harder to recover? Ive struggled with this and hope someone can answer it.
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