Hi all, I'm currently working through the education program and am finding it very beneficial. It has naturally brought some questions to mind and one I'm having some difficulty with is if I'm supposed to be able to identify the cause of the TMS I am experiencing or should it be unknown to me because they are repressed. I have been trying to piece together the emotional source for my pain and have two theories but am unsure if these thoughts are unhelpful to me or natural in the healing and discovery process. I moved back in with my parents in May last year to save up some money with a plan to move back out into my own accommodation around Feb this year. In January this year I started having panic attacks in work which then progressed to panic attacks outside then started having them in my sleep. These attacks eventually stopped but replaced by painful widespread body soreness and burning and which I am still experiencing. I was living by myself for four years before moving in with my parents and was in constant financial difficulty which was very stressful and made me feel very miserable feeling. I often berated myself for not achieving more in my life and for not having more money because of my life's failings even though I was in full time employment. I frequently felt very angry and deeply disappointed with myself because of these thoughts. I have strongly desired to be self employed all of my adult life, but have felt unable to because of my lack of confidence and self esteem. I have been in sick leave from work for the last seven months. As I mentioned I have two theories on the emotional source for the TMS....... 1) That because I am now living at my parents and my id wants to remain here out of fear of going 'back into the wilderness' in my own accommodation again and possibly being placed back into an upsetting and stressful financial setting (which wouldn't be the case this time), battling with my superego who knows I need to be moving on in my own accommodation again. This though is confusing to me because I consciously want to move out anyway to have my own space and privacy again because I often feel suffocated in my parents home. OR 2) That my id wants me to remain off work because of my desire to be self employed and trying to force the issue with my eventual retirement from work on medical grounds if I don't return soon, battling with my superego who knows I need to get back to work again so that I can move out and on with life. Again, I am not even sure if I should be aware of the cause at all. I recall reading in one of the books that unconscious thoughts rarely break through to the conscious mind but am unsure if this means before being educated in TMS or at any time in my life. Or it could have nothing to do with the above examples and be something completely unrelated. Oh its all so confusing!! Many thanks, John.