SOMEONE PLS HELP

S

Safiya

New Member
SOMEONE PLEASE HELP


This is a scream for help from someone who is drowning. In advance-sorry for my English but i am from the Netherlands.

I really feel like i am a lost case with all this chronic pain. I was diagnosed a few years ago with small fiber neuropathy (now going on 6 years from my first pregnancy to now). I have extreme chronic nerve pain all over my body (sharp pains and tingling). They say that my nerves are damaged (they did a skin biopsy and counted the small nerves). Please tell me honestly whether this is a false diagnosis or something to overcome like fibromyalgia. I have a history of traumas and fit the personality prescription to a T. (People pleaser/perfectionism/i am a pisces.). I attempted suicide because of the pain and was in a coma but came out of it. I now have a husband, 6 year old and 6 month old and since my last pregnancy also panic disorder because of all this i think. Can you please help me i am begging you? You are my last hope really.

I had a month (!) Pain free last year after trip to Turkey and really thought i was magically cured. I dont know what i did then that was different from all that i tried in the past 6 years. Maybe i was so focused on my anxiety symptoms that my mind decided to shift?

Sincerely,
Safiya
 
I don't know how to help you. Can you do some small activities that bring joy to your life? You need to experience some form of joy, even if for a few minutes. Anything that you used to like: barefoot in nature, preparing and eating a fresh salad, going for a 5 min walk outside, listening to some music, dancing for a few moments etc. I don't know what you like. You know.

You do it even if you don't feel like it. Just do it. You'll feel better.

Take care.
(Get the pictures from the trip in Turkey and look at them, study them maybe you'll remember how you felt and maybe this will help you in some ways. Just an idea...)
 
Hi @Safiya
Welcome! There is a ton of hope here! But it will take a lot of work on your part, and it might take some time to heal. But what other choice do you have? There are so many stories of people who have healed from what you have. Check out the Success Stories. Read this wiki every day. Study what everyone is saying! Let it all soak in. Read one of the books by John Sarno. Healing Back Pain is the easiest to read. Every time you read “back pain,” replace it with your symptoms. It’s all TMS.

Take this quiz: https://ppdassociation.org/ppd-self-questionnaire (Self Quiz — Psychophysiologic Disorders Association)
it will convince you you have TMS. It’s by an association of TMS doctors.

There are so many resources here to help. I guarantee you there’s hope for you! Check out this post I wrote. https://www.tmswiki.org/forum/threads/3-months-in-what-i%E2%80%99ve-learned-on-this-wiki.28229/ (3 months in: What I’ve learned on this wiki)
 
@Safiya, to help yourself right now, can you just take a deep breath?

Now, can you take another deep breath, and make it a little bit longer as you inhale?

How about a third deep breath in, like the second one, this time pursing your lips and exhaling even more slowly through your mouth?

First question: how did that feel?
Second important question: Were you able to take all three of these deep slow breaths and feel slightly better? Or, did your panicked fearful brain fight against doing this?

The first step here is to calm your extreme anxiety. >>>You are not in danger of dying from any of your symptoms, but your fear response is completely out of control and as a result you are unconsciously and irrationally in an extreme state of primitive fear.

It is well known that the simple technique of therapeutic breathing can help your rational brain re-engage.

We want to help, but we have to be working with your rational brain, so let's start with that!
 
Safiya said:
I had a month (!) Pain free last year after trip to Turkey and really thought i was magically cured. I dont know what i did then that was different from all that i tried in the past 6 years
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From the (admittedly little) I know about sfn I would be surprised that it would just disappear for a month... I therefore surmise that you went on vacation/holiday, had a good time or at least had a break from whatever worries and troubles have been affecting you at home, and the relief from that break may have lasted for a while -- that is, until you the cares and worries and anxieties of your every day life crept up on you and affected you again and overwhelmed you. It is very common for people suffering with TMS to experience their symptoms reduce or go away altogether when they have been on holiday. (For some people who suffer with TMS, the opposite is true and their symptoms get worse in association with going on holiday - because they're having a bad or not so good time on holiday or they're worrying about what's going on at home.) TMS is all about anxiety, fear and anger.

Imo it's really great advice as to what to do from @Sita, @Diana-M and @JanAtheCPA in their postings above.
 
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Hi all,

Thank you all for the replies and tips.

Actually what i "did" different is that i run out of my medicines (benzos and lyrica) and i did not even crave the lyrica but the benzo. After i came back from the trip was when the month of no symptoms began (not even ONE TWITCH)?. I agan started my benzo but not the lyrica because why would i? I had no pain? It wasnt until my psychiatrist told me that why i still had anxiety was probably because i hadnt taken my lyrica which also acts on the anxious side. I again started taking them but was AFRAID my symptoms would crawl back because it would charge something in my brain chemistry. And then after about 2 weeks in i did start to experience it all again.

I will try and do the exercises and i am also reading all the books on this subject , but my greatest object standing in the way is my fear. I wake up with fear and panick attacks till i go to sleep.

I have a real hard situation at home- does this stop me from seeing some improvements when i do the work?

Safiya
 
It's difficult for anyone to know whether going back on Lyrica brought back your bodily symptoms - or whether it was your anxiety that Lyrica might possibly bring your symptoms 'crawling back' and change something in your brain chemistry, that brought them back. My suggestion would be to consider discussing with your psychiatrist about tapering yourself off the Lyrica to see if your bodily symptoms will reduce or disappear again and that you'd like to reduce your general anxiety in a mind/body way.

I suggest reading the book 'Hope And Help for your Nerves' by Dr. Claire Weekes (you can also listen to audio, it's on Audible and Dr. Weekes reads it to you). She gives very precise direction on how to deal with anxiety and has a very calming voice. Many people with anxiety and/or TMS have been greatly helped by her.

Safiya said:
I have a real hard situation at home- does this stop me from seeing some improvements when i do the work?
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Any reduction in anxiety is liable to help with bodily symptoms caused by TMS. Sometimes it's enough to just realise what's causing your anxiety for symptoms to reduce or even go away (there might be more to your anxiety than currently 'meets the eye' and TMS work helps you get to the bottom of this), and sometimes people find that changes need to be made to their circumstances (home, relationships, work etc) to be fully free of TMS.... Doing TMS work helps you to realise exactly what's going and gradually work this out for yourself.

I also suggest putting some salient points regarding your history on your profile. That way when you post up with any more questions, you can mention that a brief summary of your history and symptoms and any treatments you've tried are on your profile (so that you don't have to keep repeating them). It greatly helps people like me to try to answer your questions as best as we possibly can... In your initial posting you didn't mention anything about having stopped your medications and not knowing about that got me 'barking up the wrong tree' in my previous reply to you.
 
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Hi everyone,

I just started my journaling journey, however i have a question. I already read a few posts that some of us are prone to 'editing' their journals, and i am certainly one of them so i promised myself not to do that. However- how about journaling about this TMS issue (including it)? It has become the biggest trauma of all- and even though my pain started BEFORE -at this point i am sure this trauma in and of itself contributes to the pain or at least my anxiety. Or is this only going to emphasize the problem and therefore my thoughts and feelings- as in staying obsessed about the issue etcetera.

I hope some of you have some ideas on this. Or maybe i am overthinking again and there isn't a right or wrong?

Thanks in advance. :)
 
@Safiya
I’m gonna be totally honest. I think you are going to need professional help. Is there any way you can get some therapy?
 
@Diana-M thank you for replying. I actually started therapy sessions already (not with a TMS therapist but a "normal" therapist and also signed up for a programme with a TMS coach here where i live but there is a small waiting list and i wanted to start already with the knowledge i have right now..
 
Safiya said:
@Diana-M thank you for replying. I actually started therapy sessions already (not with a TMS therapist but a "normal" therapist and also signed up for a programme with a TMS coach here where i live but there is a small waiting list and i wanted to start already with the knowledge i have right now..
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That’s fantastic! You are doing some great things to help yourself! :) What were you asking about the journaling? I wasn’t clear on that. Should you edit your journal entries? No. Just write anything you feel. And then tear it up and throw it away. Be really honest! Have you ever heard of a thing called JournalSpeak by Nicole Sachs? It’s a great way to journal. https://www.yourbreakawake.com/journalspeak (JournalSpeak | BreakAwake by Nicole Sachs)
 
@Diana-M bear with me here - i have just updated "My Story" for some background info (more like a book ). I dont know if this was required but even when not- i will accept as a form of therapy.

Also thank you for your advice. I was more interested in ideas on writing/journaling about this tms issue among other things. Is this a good idea or will this empasize the symptoms therefore because i will again be focusing on it (the "problem")?
 
Write about any issues that upset you and try and get your rage out. That’s what I understand is the best way. Check out the link I gave you on Nicole Sachs. She also has a book called: The Meaning of Truth. I highly recommend it.
 
Safiya said:
@Diana-M bear with me here - i have just updated "My Story" for some background info (more like a book ). I dont know if this was required but even when not- i will accept as a form of therapy.

I was more interested in ideas on writing/journaling about this tms issue among other things. Is this a good idea or will this empasize the symptoms therefore because i will again be focusing on it (the "problem")?
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It depends on the person, in this case, on you. You can try it and see how you feel, is it helpful or it makes your situation worse.

Journaling forever didn't help me. Daily meditation did. And a few other things, like keeping the mind relaxed and clean. This means to stay away from any type of drama, reading about pain, violence in the movies/written words/conversations with morons etc.

I also used tools like: working on my hobbies daily, working out (Pilates, walking outside in nature, dancing, QiGong, lifting weights etc), reading spiritual books, or silly fun books, listening to joyful music, staying in the company of fun and happy people, letting go of mean/freaks friends. And some other tools like shooting pistol, boxing etc.

I don't like Nicole Sachs, but some people find her helpful. To each his own.

Take care.
 
Sita said:
keeping the mind relaxed and clean.
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@Sita
I love all your advice, here! I especially like “keeping the mind relaxed and clean.” I’ve been trying to do this, but I didn’t have this great name for it. I love to read good literature, but so much of it has disturbing topics. So I can’t read anything like that right now. It’s hard to find good books to read. I agree, silly books work for now. It’s also hard to get all the negative, depressing and/or draining and aggressive people out of my life, but I’ve almost done it. It also involves grief as you say goodbye to some of them. (They don’t know you are saying goodbye, but you are.) I’m working on getting consistent with my daily meditation. I really know it helps!
 
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