Day 1 Sharing My Story

Hello,

I've never shared before, but I am excited that I found this forum. I have struggled with chronic pain in many forms and anxiety symptoms over the past 20 years. It started with testicular pain as a teenager. Then pelvic floor pain off and on, eventually becoming more consistent and more painful. I saw PCPs, urologists, pelvic floor PTs. PT would help briefly, but no one could find anything "wrong".

Fast forward a few years and symptoms really started to impact my life. I was very active growing up, riding bikes, playing sports, working out. My symptoms slowly ate away at what I felt I could do physically without causing a flareup, to the point where it was limited to walking.

Looking back, movement was my best ally in not only physical health, but also my mental health. I became more and more anxious, in situations when I wasn't before. I started avoiding situations or trying to plan ahead to mitigate future anxiety. It took me years to understand the cumulative impact this had on my identity and how I viewed myself . How I related to words like anxiety and depression.

I saw more providers: urologists, new pelvic floor PTs, a therapist. Tried medications, electrostimulation, gait exercises. All the while, my symptoms continued to change. I had an acute episode (stress-induced) where previous symptoms became much worse and new symptoms showed up, including pain while sitting. Then more new symptoms including sharp glute pain that would wake me up, hip flexor pain, knee pain, insomnia, and most recently ankle pain. I was constantly worried about the pain - what "should" I be doing to make it go away, when would it come back. Putting immense pressure on myself to figure it out, deal with it.

Fast forward to this spring. I heard about Dr. Sarno for the first time in a patient recovery story I listened to. I had read The Way Out in the past, but for some reason it didn't land the same way. I immediately checked out The MindBody Prescription. I've since read it multiple times along with The Divided Mind.

I'm by no means pain free yet, but I have longer stretches of little to no pain. I have a greater frequency of exceptions to the pain. I know this its TMS through and through - strong positive reinforcement by some symptoms disappearing like ankle pain when I stopped doing exercises specifically for it.

I sometimes get discouraged that I still have bouts of pain, that I still wake up with painful glutes or have insomnia. But my belief is that I've been in these patterns for such a long time, and that it still will take some time to relearn.

I finished The Mindbody Workbook this week and this has been helpful. Completing a symptom timeline also allowed me to see that it's been even longer into my childhood with GI issues that I've been able to figure out were stress induced.

A year ago, I would have said my issue was chronic pelvic pain. Singular. That any other symptom like GI or anxiety that I was experiencing was somehow unrelated. I now know there's so much more to me that also needed to be unwound. The years of repressing emotions and feelings, internalizing everything. My intense self-criticism and feelings of inadequacy.

My wife and therapist have known for years about my symptoms, but I never told anyone else. I felt that I couldn't. That pelvic pain, especially as a male, is too sensitive to share, too taboo to talk about. I've since shared with my family and while it's been at the summary level so far, it's a start. And each sharing experience has been positive.

I'm grateful for the opportunity to also share my story here. If you're dealing with something similar, know that you are not alone.

 

Hi, @reit34 !

welcome aboard! Looks like you’re already well-versed in everything with your Sarno readings. That’s great! And I’m so glad to hear it already is helping you. So many of us have had lifelong TMS symptoms. It’s such a relief to find Dr. Sarno. This forum is fantastic. You can learn so many things and get so much support. I’ve been on here a year and I’ve loved every minute of it. Great people! I see you’re starting the structured educational program. You will learn so much! Some people knock out all their TMS just with that class. Please share everything you want to with us —we like learning from each other.

Here’s a search on pelvic pain on the forum. Yes, there are lots of folks like you! https://www.tmswiki.org/forum/search/8549857/?q=Pelvic+pain&o=date (Search Results for Query: Pelvic pain | TMS Forum (The Mindbody Syndrome))

 

Welcome!
Are you aware that there is an entire youtube channel devoted to Men's pelvic TMS? He has various guests and approaches TMS from different angles because not everyone is able to "hear" Sarno's approach outright, But he offers some great insights especially in his own story. https://www.youtube.com/@TransformPelvicHealth/videos

 

@Cactusflower - I was not aware of this youtube channel, thank you for sharing!